genderaffirming.ai 

Reddit user /u/YU5AKU's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 19 -> Detransitioned: 23
female
low self-esteem
hated breasts
took hormones
regrets transitioning
escapism
trauma
depression
influenced online
influenced by friends
got top surgery
now infertile
puberty discomfort
started as non-binary
anxiety
benefited from non-affirming therapy
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, there are no serious red flags indicating this is an inauthentic account. The user expresses consistent, nuanced opinions about gender dysphoria and detransitioning, referencing personal experiences (e.g., a friend, a sister). The language is natural, with varied sentence structure and emotional tone (passionate, supportive, analytical), which is not typical of a bot. The account appears to be a genuine person, likely a desister or someone close to the issue.

About me

I started feeling uncomfortable as a teenager when I developed breasts and hated the unwanted attention. I thought becoming a man would be easier, so I started testosterone in my early twenties. I eventually realized I was using transition to escape deeper issues like trauma and low self-esteem. After stopping hormones, therapy helped me address my real problems and learn to accept myself. Now I'm learning to be happy as a woman, just the way I am.

My detransition story

My journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I was deeply uncomfortable with my body, especially when I started developing breasts during puberty. I hated them; they felt like they drew unwanted attention and made me a target for sexualization. I just wanted to be left alone and not be seen in that way. I felt like being a guy would be easier, a way to escape all that. Guys seemed to be able to just throw on clothes and exist without their bodies being constantly noticed or commented on. It felt like a low-profile, more chill way to live.

This led me to believe I was transgender. I started identifying as non-binary first, around the age of 19, because it felt like a less permanent step. But the discomfort with my female body didn't go away, and I became convinced that fully transitioning to male was the only solution. I think a lot of my feelings were influenced by what I saw online and by friends who were also exploring their gender. It felt like the only way to fix the deep unhappiness I felt.

I started testosterone when I was 21. I was on it for about two years. During that time, my voice dropped, and I grew facial hair. For a while, it felt like I was solving the problem. I was running away from the things that made me anxious about being a woman. But the underlying problems were still there. The depression and anxiety didn't magically disappear; they just found new things to latch onto. I realized I had been using transition as a form of escapism.

I started to understand that my issues weren't really about gender. They were about trauma, low self-esteem, and a deep discomfort with being sexualized. I had a lot of internalized issues about being a woman who didn't fit a feminine stereotype. I’m a tall girl with broad shoulders, and I’ve always preferred guys' clothes and hanging out with guys. I thought that meant I wasn't a "real" girl, but I've come to learn that's not true. There is no one way to be a woman.

I stopped testosterone when I was 23. It was a difficult decision, but I knew it was the right one. I needed to deal with my real problems, not just cover them up. I benefited greatly from non-affirming therapy—therapy that helped me work through my trauma and self-esteem issues instead of just affirming my desire to transition. It was a long and hard process, but it helped me learn to love myself the way I am.

I don't regret exploring transition because it led me to this understanding, but I do regret the permanent changes. The voice drop is permanent, and while I’ve made peace with it, it’s a constant reminder of a time when I was running from myself. I also worry that I might have made myself infertile, which is a serious and sad consequence to live with.

My thoughts on gender now are that it's often much more complicated than we make it out to be. For me, it wasn't about having a male soul in a female body; it was about struggling with the social expectations and discomforts that came with being female. I see now that you can be a woman and be any kind of person you want—tall, strong, flat-chested, masculine. You are still valid.

I am happy to be detransitioned now. I'm learning to embrace being a woman on my own terms.

Age Event
13 Started puberty, began to feel intense discomfort and hatred toward developing breasts.
19 Began identifying as non-binary, influenced by online communities and friends.
21 Started testosterone hormone therapy.
23 Stopped testosterone and began the process of detransition.
23 Began non-affirming therapy to address underlying trauma, depression, and anxiety.

Top Comments by /u/YU5AKU:

6 comments • Posting since February 14, 2020
Reddit user YU5AKU posts a message of support for detrans girls, telling broad-shouldered, tall, flat-chested, and masculine-presenting women they are valid and don't need to feel dysphoric to be a "normal girl."
47 pointsApr 8, 2020
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Shoutout to all the broad shouldered girls, all the tall girls, the flat girls, the girls that enjoy working out, doing martial arts, skating, weight lifting. To the girls who like hanging out with the guys more, the girls who'd rather shop in the guy's clothes section.

You're all valid and don't need to feel off. There are no criteria to being valid as a girl. You don't need to feel or behave a certain way to be a normal girl.

This is coming from a big brother who is very happy that his little sis could work through her dysphoria in time and love herself the way she is.

Once again:

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#YOU ARE ALL VALID THE WAY YOU ARE AND I'M PROUD OF YOU

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Reddit user YU5AKU explains why rejecting a community can be a healthy decision for your mental well-being, arguing that you adopt its responsibilities, opinions, and image.
13 pointsJul 27, 2020
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Rejecting communities can be one of the healthiest things ever for your mental well-being and your nerves.

You're just needlessly adopting responsibility, opinions and stances, image and more. Because when you join a community, you are the community. You sail under their flag. You don't represent them, they represent you.

Reject community, return to monke

Reddit user YU5AKU explains the cultural norms in their country, highlighting a lack of gender-based payment expectations, relaxed socializing between men and women, and a non-sexualized view of nudity exemplified by topless sunbathing. They also compliment deep voices on women.
9 pointsMar 9, 2020
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Well funny enough, over here there's indeed a great deal of equality. People are always shocked when they see each person paying what they got in a restaurant. We don't treat women any different than men. We socialize and go drinking together, don't get awkward around each other or all the nasty stuff that goes on in the business world.

Don't sexualize each other either, probably because we have such a chill and open approach to sexuality. You perhaps heard of our infamous nude beaches or "sun's out tits out" mentality. Ladies just chill in their gardens bathing in the sun topless and no one cares. We're chill folk. I promise we're nice people but we can't help but make fun of Americans and their fear of tits. Or shoulders. Sorry lol

Anyway, deep voices on women are hella nice. A lot of people find it either warm and welcoming or straight-up hot.

Reddit user YU5AKU explains how the constant sexualization of women can fuel gender dysphoria, describing the male experience as a more "low-profile" escape from being an object of attraction.
9 pointsFeb 24, 2020
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Most definitely. One of my friends is struggling with dysphoria for that reason. Doesn't wanna have boobs cause of it, doesn't wanna be noticed. A common theme you'll see is that being a guy is kinda sexually more "low-profile". They don't have too prominent or "out there" kinda sexual characteristics like boobs or hips. Or they don't have to worry about showing too much or certain clothing/fabric drawing attention to parts of their body too much, upskirts, wardrobe malfunction. Just throw on whatever and done. They're (comparatively) not objects of attraction 24/7 kinda. So I can see being a guy being probably perceived as more chill and unbothered or an escape from sexuality.

Reddit user YU5AKU explains why they believe transitioning is like running from your real self, advising OP to cancel their testosterone appointment and seek psychotherapy instead.
4 pointsFeb 14, 2020
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I'm glad you came to this realization. Transitioning doesn't solve your problems, it only sweeps them under the rug and what you really do is run away from your real self.

It's terrible to hear that you're doing so bad. Honestly, the way you say people will be confused or even mad is a giveaway that you don't want this. Don't think you're obligated to do anything. This isn't a magazine that you put into your shopping cart because you thought it's free and instead of asking the cashier to put it away, you buy it just to avoid an embarrassment. Same sentiment like a tattoo. You do not do it when you aren't 100% sure about it or else you'll regret it for the rest of your life. And a tattoo can always be removed, fixed or improved. All it takes is money. Don't put yourself through this. Especially now that you've come to this realization and aren't oblivious, you know it's gonna gnaw on you forever.

I think what you desperately need is psychotherapy. A therapist who will actually try to solve your problems. Asap. Just know it might be a long and hard ride.

Reddit user YU5AKU explains the nuanced differences between sexualization, objectification, and sexuality, clarifying that women often seek to escape not just objectification but sexual contexts in general.
3 pointsFeb 24, 2020
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I'm aware of the differences of the words (hence I've used all three of those). Under sexuality I didn't mean specifically "sexual orientation" but sexuality itself as a whole. Sexualization comes close but without a subject. As objectification I understand exactly what you described. Specifically educing somebody to just their sex or attractiveness or whatever. What I wanted to convey is that girls and women often not only want to escape objectification specifically but just sexualization or sexual context in general.