Your facial features scream marble statue to me, in all of the right ways. Not necessarily mainstream attractiveness, but classical and timeless. There is a beauty to your basic facial traits and bone structure, everything in your face works with everything in the pictures you've posted. I sincerely think your face is beautiful.

while I can't remove your pain and I am sorry that you went through all of this, please know that you are not bared from wearing wedding dresses or even bridesmaid dresses for not having breasts anymore. There are many women who have no boobs at all, my uncle's wife being one of them (she is a classic rectangle shape, very little hips, barely any ass, no boobs at all, had a short haircut when meeting him 25 years ago and marrying him and had short hair until about 5 years ago), alterations exist for that reason and some come with the dress as a package deal. My aunt's dress fit her so well, it looked gorgeous on her and she looked gorgeous in it but it had to be altered to fit her. There is nothing wrong with getting a dress altered to fit you properly, it's almost impossible to get a dress like a wedding dress or a bridesmaid dress that fits like a glove or well enough that it doesn't need alterations.
You will get to wear your wedding dress, and I promise that there are people who won't have the negative views of you that you have of yourself.

I had a therapist (which I no longer see for various reasons) who refused to accept she was a woman because of extremely similar circumstances to yours. She ended up rejecting most of her upbringing and now has a job helping women process through trauma, although she still can't bring herself to accept herself as a woman because of this. She got out of her home country and is in Canada. I think that what you're feeling is normal considering your circumstances. It's hard to be okay with being a woman when it automatically sets you as inferior and different in only bad ways. Best wishes to you

I've heard it's kind of always been a thing with butch lesbians? Don't quote me on that though, I'm not into the lesbian/bi women spaces like that, nor the overall butch ones. However, considering the fact that body dysmorphia or even just liking a look leads to extensive surgeries that masculinize men and feminize women to the extremes, I wouldn't be surprised if that's what it is for them but opposites, without any hint of gender dysphoria. Women take steroids (which are androgens, basically testosterone) to grow muscles, so it's not far fetched to imagine it.

So, to start with, you are very young. I'm 5 years older, and I can tell you, in the 5 years between me being 18 and 23, there's so much in my life that changed and in my life plans that have completely flipped on their axis. I used to want to get a hysterectomy as soon as possible, get rid of my breasts. I still want my uterus OUT as soon as possible (related health issues), however I don't want it out until I've had children. I never thought I'd ever want children, but I very much do. I am also very firm in my identity today in a way I didn't use to be, even just a year ago. I have life goals now, where I used to not have any. I think you should wait for a bit, don't jump into it until you're sure and until you have an idea of what you want your future to be like. So much can change so quickly, I think you should wait as long as you can if you're not feeling sure.

Transitioning can be good for some people, but be very cautious with it. If you don't need to transition to be able to go on with your life, do not do it. If you think that transitioning is the best thing for you, take it as slow as possible. Testosterone is not as reversible as they claim, and you can't put back what was removed surgically.

It's good that you reached out to people who have opinions that diverge from that of most people, just keep in mind that you're not transitioning for anyone but yourself. Ultimately, no one's opinion weighs as much as yours, but do make sure that you ask yourself the right questions and aren't doing anything that you're unsure about

It makes me really happy to see that you intend on waiting for a medical transition. Don't let friends pressure you into getting medical attention that isn't needed for your health and that you think you shouldn't be getting quite yet. I'm actually really proud of you for wanting to wait rather than jump straight into it.

there's nothing stopping you from making another (or possibly more than one if needed) account and start fresh.

Tbh for fanfics I just filter out certain key words where I can, and you can just avoid the hyper pro trans people. There's people who are balanced in there, they're just a bit harder to find because they tend to just hang out quietly. I don't know what you use for fanfictions, but AO3 allows you to filter out tags so that way you can avoid certain subjects and then starting from that pinpoint writers that have Discords and the such that at least aren't blatantly trans-ing out everyone left and right without stop and getting pissed that more people aren't doing it

Have you tried like a Viking haircut if you have fairly thick hair? Long hair with undercut, on days you want a more masc look you braid up the upper section of hair and the undercut shows more, the rest of the time you either have only one side showing or your hair covering both if you have enough density for it. You can put it up and have it look very feminine and it'd be an in-between. When I went through a phase of trying to look gender neutral, I did that and it worked out pretty well tbh, except for the fact that my undercut was a bit too high and didn't leave me with enough hair to properly cover said undercut

I used to be a manager and would be in charge of interviews. While seeing pronouns on a resume would not have stopped me from interviewing the person, I would already expect an age range (it is not common or recommended to put age in resumes where I live), political affiliation (usually communist leaning in ways that made them be awful employees) and one of a couple personality types, none of which were conductive to having neutral feelings about someone. My experience with the local 'pronouns-in-bio' people have always been quite negative. I believed (and still believe) in the exception but not all people do. If I had had a resume from a person and, upon meeting them, I would notice they were trans, it wouldn't have changed much for me at all. 'Pronouns-in-bio' people, trans or not, different story.

I definitely snaped out of my cognitive dissonance about myself and my gender identity when this trans woman I knew who saw herself as a succubus and some other sort of non-human got bottom surgery. I knew it was so damn wrong even with everything I believed in and advocated for. That shit made me go from far-left to moderate left to now making me pretty much a centrist on most issues. So yes, it did make me more conservative in the sense that I'm not at a leftist extreme anymore.