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Reddit user /u/__beepboopbeep__'s Detransition Story

Transitioned: 12 -> Detransitioned: 18
female
took hormones
regrets transitioning
trauma
influenced online
started as non-binary
doesn't regret transitioning
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic.

There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or not a real person. The comments show a consistent, personal narrative with specific details about medical history (dosage, appointment dates), emotional vulnerability, and a timeline of evolving self-reflection that is typical of a genuine desister. The advice given to others is supportive and nuanced, which aligns with a lived experience.

About me

I started identifying as transgender at 12, partly because I grew up without my mom and lacked a female example. I began testosterone at 16, believing it would fix me, but I later realized my desire to be male was a wish, not my reality. I had to stop the hormones on my own when my doctor was unhelpful, which was frightening. Now, at 18, I've detransitioned and am learning to define my own femininity without pressure. I don't regret the journey, as it helped me understand that my feelings stemmed from trauma, and it's okay to just be myself.

My detransition story

My whole journey started when I was around 12 years old. I never really had a female influence growing up because my mom left when I was younger, and I think that played a huge part in it. It was like a coping mechanism for me; being male was what I knew and what felt comfortable because I didn't have that example of how to be a woman.

I wished so badly that I was a man. I wished it so hard that I convinced myself I could actually become one. I think I started to believe that if I wanted it enough, that made it true. I officially came out as trans and started using a new name and pronouns when I was 12. I was really young and I got a lot of my ideas from being online.

I started taking testosterone when I was 16. I was on a dose of about 3.1. For a while, it felt like it was the right path for me, like I was finally fixing something that was wrong. But over time, I started to realize that my feelings were more complicated. I had to separate the feeling of wishing I was a man from actually being one. I realized that just because I would choose to be a man if I were born again, doesn't mean I am one now.

I decided I needed to stop testosterone. It was frustrating because my doctor was being really dodgy and hard to get ahold of, which made the process scary. I wasn't sure how to safely come off of it. I missed a shot and was three days late, and I was worried about what to do. I decided to taper down my dose slowly to be safe, doing half a dose for a while before stopping completely. I had my last doctor's appointment in mid-February to finally end it.

Now, at 18, I've detransitioned. I don't really care if people still use my old trans name or pronouns; I'm just existing as I am. I'm trying to figure out what kind of woman I want to be and exploring femininity on my own terms, which isn't as scary as I thought it would be. I don't have any serious health complications from being on T, and I'm thankful for that.

I don't exactly regret transitioning because I think I needed to go through it to get to where I am now and understand myself better. But I do think my reasons were tied to trauma and a lack of female role models, not an innate male identity. My thoughts on gender now are that we need to be more careful and separate our wishes from reality. It's okay to just be yourself without any big labels.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

Age Event
12 Came out as transgender, started using a new name and pronouns.
16 Started taking testosterone.
18 Decided to detransition, stopped hormone therapy.

Top Comments by /u/__beepboopbeep__:

7 comments • Posting since January 16, 2024
Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) explains that her issue was wishing she was a man so badly she thought she could become one, and that we need to separate these feelings from reality.
32 pointsJan 17, 2024
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For me, I think the issue was I WISHED I was a man. And wished it so bad I thought I could be one. If I were to be born again I would choose to be a man. Although I’m not one now like I thought I was. We need to start to separate some of these feelings

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) advises a younger user considering detransitioning to go off blockers and experiment with femininity, sharing her own experience of exploring her identity since age 12.
13 pointsMay 22, 2024
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Honestly I’d say go off blockers and maybe try to experiment with femininity or however you would like to express being a girl! I’m on the younger side too and once I gave myself a chance to figure it out and see what kind of girl I wanted to be it wasn’t so scary, if your parents supported your transition I bet they would support you exploring your gender in other ways. If you ever need advice feel free to reach out to me! I’m 18 but I’ve been “trans” since I was 12.

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) explains their decision to detransition, citing a lack of female influence after their mother left and plans to stop HRT after a February doctor's appointment.
11 pointsJan 16, 2024
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Thank you so much for this response, gonna get personal a bit here, but my mom left when I was younger and I never really had a female influence, I think it was almost like a coping mechanism for me, it was what I knew and was comfortable with. I’m definitely gonna stop hrt asap, I have a doctors appointment mid Feb so I will continue to take my doses until then just for safety, idk how coming off T works. I reallly appreciate you!

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) asks for advice on tapering off testosterone and how to handle a missed dose.
6 pointsFeb 16, 2024
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How should i taper it down? I think im gonna do half a dose now, and next week. Then after that half of that dose for two weeks then stop. Dunno if that’s too quick etc… also I missed my T shot and am 3 days late, should I just take it now, I’ve never missed a T shot like this 😭 I rlly appreciate your responses

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) explains that detransitioning can be a gradual, low-pressure process, noting that it's fine to take years and that she is comfortable with people still using her old name and pronouns.
3 pointsMay 22, 2024
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dw that’s literally what I did too lmao, it’s a great starting point or even if you enjoy that a good point to stay, you could literally take years to de trans and it would be chill. For me so many people still use my trans name and pronouns and idrc, I’m just kinda existing and that’s fine! So don’t feel like you need to make a huge decision or be one way or another

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) comments on the difficulty of contacting her doctor, whose phone number has disappeared from the website, while trying to manage her 3.1ml testosterone dose.
3 pointsJan 17, 2024
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Tbh my doctor is being super dodgy rn, I’m trying to email her and no reply, and then I go to call and her telephone number is gone from the website? It’s all so weird and not to mention frustrating, I think I just have to wait until my appointment in Feb. I’m on 3.1 or something like that

Reddit user __beepboopbeep__ (detrans female) explains her plan to confirm a doctor's appointment and discusses the difficulty of finding physicians in Canada.
3 pointsJan 17, 2024
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I’m pretty sure it is, if not I’m sure she would have emailed or something. I’ll just go on Feb 12th and if they are there than fantastic 😭and I have a family doctor I could probably go to worst case scenario. I’m Canadian so doctors are a bit hard to find otherwise