This story is from the comments by /u/ali-pal that are listed below, summarised with AI.
User Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account "ali-pal" appears to be authentic.
There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or a fake account. The comments display:
- Personal, detailed narrative: The user shares a specific, multi-year timeline of their transition, detransition, and the physical/emotional changes involved.
- Internal consistency: The story remains coherent across multiple comments over several months, detailing a logical progression of realization and change.
- Emotional complexity: The user expresses a wide range of genuine, nuanced emotions (excitement, regret, fear, hope, anger) that align with the experiences described by many detransitioners.
- Engagement with the community: The user responds to others with personalized advice and shares their own experiences in a supportive manner, which is characteristic of a real community member.
The account's history and the depth of personal reflection strongly suggest it is a real person documenting their detransition journey.
About me
I was a depressed teenager who thought becoming a guy was the answer to my self-hatred, so I started testosterone at 16. For a while it felt like a fix, but the hormones made me emotionally numb and I later panicked when my hair started to thin. I found this forum and realized my transition was driven by pain and outside influence, not my true self. I stopped testosterone at 19 and reconnected with my body as a woman. I'm now 22 and finally learning to love myself, even with the permanent changes I have to manage.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was around 14. I was a really unhappy teenager, struggling with depression, anxiety, and an eating disorder. Puberty was awful; I felt completely out of place in my own body and hated the changes, especially my breasts and my painful, irregular periods. I felt like an outsider.
I found a community online, on Twitter, where all my friends were starting to identify as non-binary or trans. It felt like I had found the answer to all my problems. I became convinced that the reason I hated myself and my body was because I was really a boy. I came out as a trans guy when I was 15. I begged my parents for hormones. They were really hesitant and sad about it, but after about six months of me insisting it was the only thing that would keep me from being suicidal, they signed the paperwork. I started testosterone when I was 16.
For a while, it felt like a magic fix. The self-hatred seemed to melt away. I was ecstatic about the changes like my voice dropping and growing body hair. I passed completely as a guy; no one ever guessed I was trans. I even identified as a gay man for a time. But the hormones also made me emotionally numb. I couldn't cry anymore. I just felt "fine" all the time, never truly happy or sad, just flat. I lived that way for three years.
Things started to change when I was about 18. I began working out and eating better, lost about 50 pounds, and for the first time, I felt happy with my body because of my own effort, not because of the hormones. I started growing my hair out and dressing in a more feminine way, and it felt amazing. I started to enjoy the feminine parts of my appearance that I had tried to hide for so long. Then I noticed my hair was starting to thin and my hairline was receding. I panicked. I loved my long hair and the idea of going bald terrified me.
I decided to search online for other trans guys who had stopped testosterone because of hair loss. That’s how I found this detransition community. Reading the first story I saw was like looking in a mirror. It triggered a massive identity crisis. All the doubts I had been suppressing came flooding back. I realized that a big part of my desire to transition was influenced by my online friends and a deep-seated self-hatred. I had been trying to escape being a girl because I thought femininity was weak or undesirable. I even had a kind of obsession with the idea of being a feminine gay boy, which seemed cooler than just being a girl. I saw that my desire to transition wasn't coming from a true, innate identity, but from a place of pain and a need to run away from myself.
I decided to stop testosterone cold turkey right after I moved away for college at 19. It was a huge relief. The first few weeks were rough with hormone withdrawals, but once my natural estrogen started to come back, I began to feel a full range of emotions again. It was overwhelming but wonderful to feel things deeply, even sadness. I started to feel a connection to my body that I hadn't felt in years. When my period returned after about two months, it felt like my body was healing itself, and I felt whole.
Socially, I took it slow. I was living on a gender-inclusive dorm floor, so I had a safe space to be ambiguous. I started by just wearing a sports bra instead of binding, which felt liberating. I told my closest friends first, and everyone was surprisingly supportive. About two months after stopping T, I was at a party and introduced myself to a stranger using my birth name. It felt so right that I decided to come out to everyone on social media that night. Switching back to my birth name felt like I was reuniting with the girl I had tried to erase.
Physically, the changes from estrogen were amazing. My body fat redistributed to my hips and breasts, my skin got softer, and my body hair thinned out significantly after I shaved it all off. My breasts, which had been saggy and flat from years of binding and testosterone, actually became fuller and perkier. My face shape changed back to looking more feminine. The permanent changes are my voice, which is a deep baritone, and my facial hair, which I still have to shave every few days. I plan to get electrolysis for that. The voice is the hardest part to deal with; sometimes people see me as female until I speak, and then they get confused. It’s frustrating, but I’m learning to accept it as part of my story, and I might try voice training.
Looking back, I see that my transition was a way to cope with trauma, low self-esteem, and the general discomfort of female puberty. I was influenced heavily by the online communities I was in. I don't think I was ever truly trans. I believe I was a girl who needed to learn to love herself, and I took a very long and difficult detour to figure that out. I have a lot of regrets about the permanent changes, especially my voice, and I grieve for the time I lost. I'm angry that I was allowed to make such a permanent decision as a teenager. But I'm also incredibly grateful that I realized the truth when I did, at 19, before getting any surgeries. I'm now 22 and finally living as the woman I am, and I'm happier and more comfortable in my own skin than I've ever been.
My Transition/Detransition Timeline
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 14 | Diagnosed with depression, anxiety, eating disorder. Felt intense discomfort with female puberty. |
| 14 | Found online trans communities; friends came out as trans/non-binary. |
| 15 | Came out as a trans man. |
| 16 | Started testosterone after months of begging my parents. |
| 18 | Began to have doubts; started working out, lost weight, grew hair out, enjoyed feminine expression. |
| 18 | Noticed hair loss/receding hairline, which caused panic. |
| 19 | Searched online about stopping T due to hair loss, found detrans community and had a revelation. |
| 19 | Stopped testosterone cold turkey (August). |
| 19 | Moved to college, started presenting in a more gender-neutral way, told close friends. |
| 19 | Period returned (approx. October). |
| 19 | Came out publicly as detransitioning and switched back to birth name (November). |
| 20 | Continued physical and emotional changes from estrogen; body fat redistribution, softer skin, less body hair. |
| 22 | Present day: Living as a woman, managing permanent changes like deep voice and facial hair. |
Top Reddit Comments by /u/ali-pal:
Thank you!! Physically, the hormone withdrawals were rough for the first month, but once the estrogen came back, I’ve been feeling pretty great physically. The only thing is I’ve noticed my muscles are atrophying but I expected it. Mentally, the past few days I’m feeling better than I think I’ve ever felt in my life... totally content with my body, and my circumstances. I’m happy to be in school and I’ve made a lot of friends, I’ve learned to be happy with who I am, and I’m figuring out what I want to do in life.
I hesitate to make something like a “progress” post because I don’t want to think of finding my way back to womanhood as something I have to strive for... but... I am just very proud of how far I’ve come with loving and accepting myself in the past year.
I watched some old videos from a year ago, and I just seemed so dead inside. Everyone around me at the time was wondering if I was okay. I thought I was just going to feel that way forever. My body and mind were so detached from each other. It felt like I was fighting a battle internally every day. I was just so fucking different. A shell of who I used to be.
I think I’m much closer now to the person I’m meant to be... the person inside has begun to show herself more and more. Bright, happy, bubbly, unafraid to be herself. I’m glad she’s finally allowed to exist in me. And my brain and body have finally become one.
Lord. It’s hard to see this and try not to wish my mom had been the same way. Thank you for doing what you believe is right... thank you for sticking to your gut instincts.
Hearing my mom tell me that she didn’t believe I was trans from day one, but then taking me from therapist to therapist until I got my testosterone referral then signing the paperwork really messed me up. All I needed was a parent who was there for me like you are to your daughter. Thank you for being there for her.
Facial hair growth hasn’t stopped. I’m going to get electrolysis/laser at some point soon. My hair started falling out which is actually the reason I found this sub. Wanted to stop T so I didn’t go bald, but wondered if other trans men had done that. Turns out I’m not a trans man after all lol
I’m really grateful to this community for being a supportive place for people like to me find themselves and express all that comes along with the process of detransitioning. I wanted to throw my own story into the mix so that I can hopefully help someone the way I’ve been helped by seeing other detrans females speak out.
I got on T at 16 and everything that you described is what happened to me.
It really sucks knowing that my being born earlier was much of the reason this was allowed to happen to me. Doesn’t almost every teenage girl want to be a boy at some point? How did it get from that to medical transition?
Hey. I just want you to know I felt the exact same way. I was on T for 3 years. I was SO hairy on T. So fucking hairy. I thought I would never look like a girl again. I even said that.
But I’m 4 months off T now. I shaved my entire body once and my hair got SOOO much thinner and lighter. I think at least half my hair follicles don’t grow hair anymore.
My shoulders and back don’t grow hair anymore. My chest hair barely grows (it was heavy before) my stomach hair is basically gone also. What hair is left is very light colored. My thighs are also very blonde. My arms and calves are still pretty hairy but the hair is blonde there too.
I’m really really happy with the way estrogen has worked. It just takes time. I know it sucks ass to wait. But it will work. I look super female now. Like, insanely. My body fat has redistributed enough where anyone who looks at me reads me as female unless I haven’t shaved in a few days or speak.
The only thing is, you will probably need electrolysis or laser hair removal for your face. My facial hair hasn’t slowed down its growth at all. My voice is my biggest source of discomfort now, that’s the only thing I feel like I need to actively work on to appear female. Thankfully, almost everything else goes back to normal.
yes, i’m a freshman, just began college this semester! It was really rough at first to have the realization that I need to detransition while starting the biggest change of my life thus far. Moving out ultimately helped me to realize it though I think. I’ve met so many cool people who understand me and love me already and my group has been so supportive of my decisions to use a new name privately, then publicly coming out, etc. everyone’s been really amazing.
thank you very much! my birthday actually falls on thanksgiving this year so I’ll take that extra to heart :)
how can children understand the long term effects of transitioning? This is a decision for ADULTS to make. with fully developed brains. who can understand the consequences of their actions. NOT CHILDREN. and ESPECIALLY not pre-pubescent children. I admire her for speaking out. This must be incredibly hard on her mental health. I hope she’s doing well.
This is really incredible. You look gorgeous. And on hair loss: I was on T for three years and the reason I stopped is because of my hair falling out for a year. My hairline receded to a very masculine widows peak high up my head and after nearly 5 months off T my hair loss slowed and my hairline is smoothing out with many fine baby hairs and it’s definitely more feminine.