This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's story is highly specific, emotionally consistent, and reflects a common desister narrative: intense, lifelong dysphoria that resolved in early adulthood without medical intervention. The language is personal, nuanced, and shows engagement with others' posts, which is not typical bot behavior. The passion and perspective align with a genuine desister experience.
About me
I'm a woman who felt from age five that I was supposed to be a boy, and that intense feeling defined my entire youth. I made plans for a full medical transition but couldn't afford it, which frustrated me at the time. Moving to a new city for college broke that cycle and I poured my energy into my art and personal growth instead. I only began to feel at home in my female body once I stopped obsessing over my gender. I'm now free from that dysphoria and so grateful I never made permanent changes to my body.
My detransition story
My experience with gender dysphoria was a very long phase that lasted for most of my life, but it did finally pass. I feel like I need to share my whole story so others might see that these feelings can change.
It started when I was really young. I have a clear memory from when I was five years old of feeling sad that I wasn't a boy. That feeling never went away; it just got stronger as I grew up. Throughout my entire childhood and into my teenage years, feeling like I was in the wrong body was the main focus of my existence. It was all I could think about. In my teens, I even started identifying as male in some of my social circles. I made plans to medically transition—I wanted top surgery and bottom surgery. But I never did it because I didn't have the money, the access to doctors, or the support from my family to make it happen. At the time, I was really frustrated about that.
Everything changed when I was 20. I moved away from my tiny hometown to go to college in San Francisco. It was a huge culture shock and a complete change of scene. Being ripped out of my old environment totally broke the rhythm of my life. The image I had of myself—this small-town, lonely high school kid who was born in the wrong body—started to fade away. Being in a new place with new people gave me new experiences and new goals. I started to redirect all the energy I had been pouring into wanting to be a man into other things. I focused on becoming a better artist, getting into a career I loved, traveling, and just getting healthy in my mind, body, and spirit.
Slowly, my gender identity just wasn't a priority for me anymore. It’s almost counter-intuitive, but I only started to feel at home in my biological female body once I stopped obsessing over my gender. I began to wonder why I had ever thought I needed to transition to a man in order to love and accept myself. That idea stopped making sense to me.
Looking back, I think a lot of my discomfort was related to gender stereotypes. Even though my own family didn't push me to be a certain way, the rest of the world did. I have very distinct, uncomfortable memories from school when the teacher would divide the class into boys and girls. I always wanted so badly to be with the boys and felt completely out of place with the girls.
I consider myself extremely lucky that I was too broke to afford surgery when I was deep in those feelings. I am certain that if I had gotten top surgery or bottom surgery, I would have regretted it deeply now. The dysphoria symptoms disappeared for me right as I was becoming an adult, and I'm so glad I didn't make any permanent changes to my body before I had that chance to grow and change my perspective.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 5 | First distinct memory of feeling sad I wasn't a boy. |
| Throughout childhood and teens | Intense, lifelong dysphoria worsened; it was the main focus of my life. |
| Teen years | Began to socially identify as male in some circles; made plans for medical transition. |
| 18-19 | The intense dysphoria I had my whole life began to finally fade. |
| 20 | Moved to San Francisco for college; the change of environment profoundly changed my perspective. |
| Mid-20s | Was completely free from dysphoria; felt at home in my biological body. |
Top Comments by /u/almostdidbutdidnt:
My experience with severe dysphoria was absolutely, 100% a phase. It lasted a very long time, but shortly after I reached adulthood and had some new life experiences, the phase was over.
Real quick, my timeline: I developed dysphoria further back than I can remember. At 5 I distinctly remember feeling sad that I wasn't a boy. This endured and worsened and was the fixation of my existence throughout my childhood into my teens, at which point I began identifying as male in some circles. No medical transition due to lack of access, funds, and support, but I had a plan to make it happen.
At 20 I left my tiny home town for college in San Francisco. The scene change and culture shock was profound and absolutely knocked me out of the rhythm my life had thus far adhered to. Just being away from home, the image I had of myself as a small town, high school loner born in the wrong body began to fade away. New experiences and aspirations helped me redirect my energy, from trying to become a man, to simply trying to make my existence the most gratifying one possible. I focused on becoming a better artist, getting into a field I loved, traveling, getting healthy (mind, body, and spirit). Eventually my gender identity wasn't a priority for me AT ALL. I feel at home in my biological body today, and it's almost counter intuitive that it only happened once I stopped obsessing over my gender.
That's my story so far!
Are you still in therapy? You should definitely take these thoughts to your next session. Explore why the dysphoria symptoms seemed to disappear right before surgery. That feels significant to me.
All I can say as far as advice, is that while you're in the midst of questioning your current state, you should consider (safely) delaying anymore surgeries or treatments you may have scheduled and refocus your energy on further examining why you feel doubt.
This is my story too. I never had access to the funds to have the procedure. I consider myself extremely lucky for having been broke during that period of my life because I would have spent my money on top surgery and bottom surgery, and I'm certain I would have regretted it.
18-19 is when my lifelong dysphoria began to fade too. By my mid-20s I was dysphoria free.
Around 18 is where I started wondering why I could only imagine accepting myself if I transitioned to male. Eventually that whole idea -- that I'd have to first transition in order to love myself -- stopped making sense.
Great post! Gender stereotypes definitely feel like a factor for me, even though I was raised in a household that didn't push me to conform to any particular female stereotypes.
The schools did. Sports teams did. Other people (both kids and adults) did. The media did.
Some of my most distinct uncomfortable memories from childhood were when the teacher would divide the class into two: boys in one group, and girls in the other. I wanted so badly to be with the boys, and felt so out of place being with the girls.