This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic user. The comments display:
- Personal, detailed history: The user shares specific, complex personal experiences (e.g., multiple surgeries, a motorcycle accident, working in mental health) that are consistent across posts.
- Emotional complexity: The tone ranges from analytical and passionate to vulnerable and humorous, which is consistent with a real person processing a difficult experience.
- Internal logic: The user's perspective—that they were convinced into dysphoria, the importance of treating primary diagnoses first, and their personal journey of detransition—is a coherent, if strong, opinion held by some in the detrans community.
The account presents as a genuine detransitioned man.
About me
I was a lonely young man with autism and anxiety who was convinced online that my discomfort meant I was a woman. I lived as female and had surgery, believing it would solve my problems, but a serious motorcycle accident forced me to confront the truth during my recovery. I realized my primary issues were never about gender and should have been treated first. I've since detransitioned back to male and am rebuilding my strength, though I live with permanent changes like infertility. I regret what happened but am using my experience to become a stronger man and advocate for more caution.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition was a long and complicated one, driven by a lot of confusion and a desperate need to belong. I was born male, but I never really fit in, especially during puberty. I was diagnosed with Asperger's, ADHD, and social anxiety, which made me a social outcast. I also struggled with body dysmorphia that led to bulimia. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin, but I now see that discomfort wasn't really about gender; it was about a lot of other things piling up.
I was heavily influenced online and by a group of friends who fully believed in gender ideology. When you're an outcast, you take any friends you can get, and I was glad to have them. They, along with internet videos and those simple "Am I trans?" quizzes, convinced me that my feelings meant I was a woman. I had thought about it maybe three times as a kid, but it was always triggered by trauma from bullying and seeing girls get attention. It wasn't a real, deep-seated feeling.
Looking back, I was sold lie after lie. I was so convinced I could become someone new and different, that I could escape all my problems. I was convinced into believing I had gender dysphoria. As humans, if you tell yourself a lie long enough, you start to believe it. I ended up on estrogen HRT for almost five years and I got bottom surgery.
The wake-up call came gradually. One day, I just looked in the mirror and I saw nothing but my old self. I felt him calling to me, screaming not to end his existence. I realized that my primary issues were my autism, anxiety, and body dysmorphia, and the gender stuff should have always been a secondary concern. Everything else should have been treated and well managed first. I regret that the professionals I trusted weren't properly educated on who would actually benefit from transitioning.
A serious motorcycle accident while I was on estrogen resulted in three slipped discs and a fractured vertebra in my lower spine. The recovery was brutal and left me homebound for months, which gave me way too much time to think. It was during this period that my questioning became intense. I started to realize that my body, weakened by estrogen, wasn't able to support my injuries well. This physical crisis forced me to confront the reality of what I had done.
I’ve since detransitioned and started testosterone again. It’s only been a short time, but I can already feel a difference—my muscles are sore but getting stronger, and my body is better able to support my damaged spine. I have to live with the permanent changes now. I'm infertile, and I have to dilate forever to maintain the results of my bottom surgery. I plan to get top surgery to remove the breast tissue I developed from estrogen, and I'll probably use tattoos to hide the scars.
I do have regrets about transitioning. I wish I could change the past, but since I can't, I try to see the value in the experience. It made me a better man than I could have ever hoped to be. I saw the world through a female lens and I learned a lot. The shame is a powerful emotion, but I'm trying to use it as fuel to move forward, not let it destroy me.
My thoughts on gender now are that there's no one way to be a man. I'm a guy who collects space and Disney memorabilia, carries golf clubs and fishing poles in my truck, and plays DND. However you choose to be a man is up to you. I hope my story can help others, and I really believe we need to stop informed consent HRT and surgeries until proper, long-term research is done.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 25 | Began taking estrogen HRT |
| 29 | Underwent bottom surgery (vaginoplasty) |
| 30 | Serious motorcycle accident on estrogen, resulting in spinal injuries |
| 30 | Began intensely questioning my transition during recovery |
| 30 | Stopped estrogen and began detransitioning |
| 30 | Started testosterone therapy again |
Top Comments by /u/aubreynicole96:
That definitely put a lot into a picture for me! Partly is why I came on here because I like to understand all sides of my thoughts or feelings to be able to help process things in my mind! While staying transitioned may still be the right thing, questioning it at times can be very intense thoughts! I agree as well with I have been through quite a bit! Going from fully healthy to basically spending the last 4ish months being home way too much and now possibly having a second surgery for injuries from the motorcycle accident Is very tough! I really appreciate your advice! Gaining perspective from more then just the people in my life is a big help for me to clarify and help resolve my thoughts.
To add in here I agree with many others a therapist is top priority! As well as medical help to see the possibility of you are still able to have your own children with how early you started but you’d have to be off hrt!
The good news is I can tell you there is no correct way to be a man! Some of us like football, others like golf or soccer! Some can cook in a grill or some learned to just cook with a camp fire! We all come from different walks of life that make us individuals! Some things that could really boost confidence like lifting some weights! As my dad use to tell me when I was in middle and high school “weights before dates and curls before girls”! But if you do detransition then how you be a man is all up to you! Hell I break the social norms because I’m both a nerd that collects space and Disney memorabilia and I carry golf clubs and 2 fishing poles in my lifted truck at all times! I’m somehow country as heck yet a nerd that would play DND! However you choose to be manly is yours to do! Even more effeminate gay men I still see as men they are just men a whole other way! So take your time, talk to mental health care providers and do some soul searching! Find your interests, things you don’t like, or maybe even make a dream of how you invision your masculinity! You got this!
I concur! We can see it happen in stages! Those on the spectrum with autism or Asperger’s like myself generally tend to be social outcasts! For example I have social anxiety, adhd, Asperger’s and body dysmorphia that cause bulimia! People like me tend to be identified by these groups that already believe in the gender ideology and are specifically targeted!
When you are an outcast you gladly take any friends you can get! And the issue also in gender ideology lays the fact the even the professionals we trust with our mental health are not properly educated on who would actually benefit from transitioning! We get sold lie after lie. Until one day most of us wake up and look in the mirror and I saw nothing but my old self and I felt him calling to me and screaming not to end his existence.
But when you take someone like me, throw in a few woke friends, internet videos, 10 question am I trans tests later confirmed by uneducated professionals you get the mix for a detransitioner. Sure I thought about it maybe 3 times as a kid but it was also triggered by trauma related to bullying and seeing all the girls get attention but I ended up back in reality! It took longer as an adult to do so but better late then never!
I was so convinced I could become someone new and different. I was convinced into gender dysphoria. As we all know as humans if you tell yourself or others a lie long enough, eventually we start to believe our own lies! I hope we can stop the social contagion spread and get better long term studies to educate therapists and psychologists! They seem to throw 5 dozen things to mean you’re trans in one diagnosis.
But the sad reality is would be most of us have a primary diagnosis and anything gender related should be secondary diagnosis! Everything else should be treated and well managed first! And if it were up to me I’d put an end to all surgeries and informed consent HRT immideatly until the research was actually conducted!
And your not really late to the party, from the other detransitioners I have met we seem to think similarly but the one event in our lives that brings us to that realization is all different. As well as any other diagnosis that was never properly treated!
I know it should help I guess my brain just is fighting me. And with therapist that aren’t equipped thanks to people trying to say detransitioners are super rare we don’t have much help for the mental warfare of it! Almost kind of a sense like why bother going back! I’m hoping T will help change that! And add a few good tattoos in to hide any future “gynecomastia” scars 😂
It’s perfectly natural to look back on decisions we have made that affect our lives so greatly and feel ashamed! But without said decisions we wouldn’t be the people we are today! What’s not good is to dwell on it but move forward with valuable life experience! I may have had grs but now I know after passing pretty well to the extent I can what life is like as a female! I saw the world through that lense! If I say anything I’d say I wish I could change the past but since I can’t, it has made me a better man then I could have ever hoped! So I have to get top surgery and dilate forever to keep some form of a life in the bedroom but it could always be worse! I’m blessed for the ability to see the light in the darkest scenarios but it can be learned! Maybe think about some life lessons you learned in your time spent transitioning, or how you can use it to help others even if it is just on this app!
Shame is a very powerful emotion but it’s up to you how we use it! We can let it destroy those of us with social anxiety or we can grab it by the nads and use it to move forward to new highs we could only heave dreamed about! Just like Bobby Boucher uses bullies as tackling fuel, we can turn our own emotions and lives into our own tackling fuel! 😄😄
Well coming from someone who had bottom surgery and was in hrt for almost 5 years, along with 3 slipped discs in the L spine and one fractured vertebra from a motorcycle crash while on E, T definitely has been helping me and I’m just back in it 2 weeks now! I feel my muscles sore every day but they get a little stronger as well! I can notice a difference in my bodies ability to support my spine a lot better! I’d say giving it time, doing a little working out here and there on your core and back muscles could do wonders! It has for me so far and of course a chiropractor showing me some tricks to crack my lower back too so it doesn’t lock up bad again!
I second what bullfrog said having worked in the mental health field for quite a while! Stability isn’t proven over 10 days. And I don’t think jumping into T and too surgery is your answer! Getting stable on your current regimen should be top priority!