Aside from the terrible things it could do to your body, you will lose privileges. People will start to treat you funny. You will be seen as a political and social and even as a sexual threat. In my opinion, you will be happier to learn to remain as you are.

Well, I have tried to talk with a few mentor-type people about this, but I get the vibe that they approach it very carefully because of the tension surrounding transgender issues and churches, so it's been a little awkward. It seems like sometimes people hold back. Perhaps I could do a little looking around and see if I can find someone who the conversation is more flowy with.

LOL. Honestly I still dress and present pretty masculine or dare I say, butch. The only thing that's changed about my clothing since detransitioning is that I wear more sweatsuits now hahaha. But because of how my body is changing, I am starting to get she'd. I'm getting used to it but I feel a little nervous to respond vocally, cuz of my voice.

I'm kind of like this. I stopped testosterone because I wanted to follow Jesus. I still have a desire to take T and to look/feel a certain way. I'm learning to be okay with myself the way that I have been made but it's taking some getting used to. Its like I have to change the whole way that I think. I would constantly think of reasons why it would be "okay" for me to go back on T even though I don't agree with it and I think the world is going crazy with this gender ideology nonsense... it's like the pull between two different worlds and I'm stuck in the middle. That said, I think I'll be able to stay off it for life and get used to being the way I am.

You are welcome ❤️❤️❤️ I don't know you and I don't know how you present so I can't tell you what privileges you would specifically lose, but I can tell you that if you transition you'll find out. And I want to spare you that. Even if you pass, if someone ever outs you or you don't pass well enough in a certain situation, you can still be in a lot of trouble.

diet and weight training : )

in the least 'woo' way possible - imagine that you want to eat foods that will "raise your frequency", and that you want to ideally avoid foods that won't.

the food that feels too saturated or makes you feel slow or groggy, avoid it. and try to add foods that you notice help your sense of wellbeing.

you can up your protein intake, which will boost your body's metabolism. if you eat lots of healthy proteins you will notice yourself sweating a little more. you'll feel it.

try to cut (or greatly reduce) the amount of saturated fats you consume, that will make a huge difference for you.

& try to avoid lots of sugar, things like pops or cakes (though the occasional banana bread probably won't be a bad thing.) and eat more leafy greens.

if you can balance a decent diet with 3 gym trips (or other exercise) a week, it won't be long before you're feeling great.

best of luck friend :D

Thank you. I carefully consider your nuanced suggestion.

From my viewpoint, God is absolute truth, and I want to be open to the idea of having been created a certain way, but I believe there's honour in that. It's not without its own struggles of course. Because one ends up asking questions about women having the right to speak in church and things like that. Of course the answer always comes down to love. I think I'll find the cure to dysphoria in my religion but I can also see this taking time. I've almost always believed in God, so for me it's not quite the same as transitioning.

I really appreciate your comment.

if you keep up with training you might be able to offset it a bit, but you... will probably notice a difference. you may notice that you feel significantly weaker, but that you are able to "bounce back" in a sense once you've become more stabilized again.

it will probably be difficult to adjust for a while.

BUT once you get past the initial frustration, you'll be able to focus more on pushing yourself relative to your body's natural capabilities.

I hope things get easier for you. it doesn't have to be a dent in your masculinity. I'm sorry for the crass-ness, but if it helps at all, I've heard jokingly from other women that the balls are the worst part. 😅 I don't think you'll have a difficult time with dating, in fact I don't think this will affect that at all. I could never understand what this is like for you, but from an outsider's perspective, your orchiectomy definitely wouldn't affect how I perceive your masculinity. anyone with understanding wouldn't let it affect their perception either. please take heart.