This story is from the comments by /u/becauseimtransginger that are listed below, summarised with AI.
User Authenticity Assessment: Suspicious Account
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic user. The comments display:
- Personal, specific details: A history of sexual assault, family medical history (hormonal imbalances, hysterectomy, over-fertility), a long history with therapy, and a personal timeline for freezing eggs.
- Internal consistency: A clear, logical, and consistent narrative about wanting to wait before medically transitioning.
- Complex emotion and reasoning: The user expresses a nuanced perspective, blending personal experience with a logical, risk-averse approach, which aligns with the passionate and often cautious nature of the desister community.
- Natural interaction: The comments include genuine-seeming replies and gratitude directed at other users.
About me
I'm a female who has felt a disconnect from my body and a desire to be male since I was young, but I've never felt a rush to medically transition. A history of childhood trauma and a strong family history of serious hormone imbalances have made me very cautious. I'm taking a logical approach, so I plan to freeze my eggs and wait at least ten years in a social transition before considering hormones. I'd rather be sure than make a permanent decision for my future self now. My only regret is how difficult it is to have open conversations about the complex reasons behind these feelings.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been a long process of thinking things through, and I'm still in the middle of it. I'm a female, and from a young age, I've felt a disconnect with my body and a desire to be the opposite sex. But for me, it was never something I felt I had to rush into.
A big part of my life that I've had to work through is a history of sexual assault when I was a child. I've been in therapy since I was very young and I feel like I've come to terms with it, but I've noticed that a lot of professionals I've seen don't really know how to talk about it in the context of my gender feelings. They either avoid it or call it an "interesting point of view," which feels like a taboo subject nowadays.
I also approach things from a very logical, practical standpoint. I'm an aspiring physicist, so I tend to look at the biological facts. My family has a long history of serious hormone imbalances. My aunt, who I'm very similar to physically, had such bad problems she needed a hysterectomy, and my doctors have told me I'll likely face the same issues in my 30s. Because of this, taking opposite-sex hormones is a high risk for me and would need to be closely monitored. It just doesn't make sense to me to start that when my body isn't even fully developed yet. That seems dangerous.
Because of the family health history, which includes over-fertility, I've decided to get my eggs frozen when I turn 18. I'm okay with waiting on medical transition because I don't feel that urgency that other people seem to feel. For me, it was a no-brainer to want hormones, but the question is when. I'd rather be ten years into just a social transition and then decide to detransition, than be five years on hormones and have to undo all of that. I'm not mature enough right now to make a decision for my 30-year-old self. I've seen statistics that people who think about it deeply for a long time, like 5-10 years, rarely regret their decisions later, whether they transition or not. I'd rather be certain than play a risky game.
I've always been called strong-willed, but I see it as just being logical. It's been hard sometimes because people don't understand why I apply logic to something as emotional as gender identity. My friends and family have their opinions, but I have a difficult time accepting their views over my own intuition and way of seeing things.
I don't have any regrets about my transition so far because I haven't medically transitioned. My only regret is that it's so hard to have open conversations about the more complicated reasons behind these feelings, like trauma. I'm grateful I've given myself this time to wait and be sure.
Here is a timeline of my journey so far:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Very Young | Experienced sexual assault. Began therapy. |
| Childhood - Present | Felt a persistent disconnect from my female body and a desire to be male. |
| Adolescence | Went to a residential therapy program for adolescents. Have seen over 20 therapists in total. |
| Present (Teenager) | Socially transitioned. Planning to freeze my eggs at age 18. Decided to wait for at least 10 years of social transition before considering medical intervention. |
Top Reddit Comments by /u/becauseimtransginger:
That’s exactly what I said. As I have history with sexual assault as a child, which happens to be a large population of trans people. I want to be super sure, and 10 years seems like enough time to really think about it, half of that time being an adult. I’m not in a rush, and I don’t know why everyone else makes it out to be something to rush.
Who knows, that might happen to me too 🤷♂️. I would rather be 10 year into social transition and not medically transitioned and say “I’m detransitioning” than 5 years on hormones and have to go through the processes of undoing that. I don’t think I’m mature enough right now to make that decision for my 30 year old self.
You are wonderfully and incredibly helpful. Thank you so much for your comment. I was hoping someone who was enlisted or has severed could tell me their experience and what helped them. I will definitely be saving this is talk to some of the people discouraging me about that. Again, genuinely, thank you.
Thank you so much. I think I am also giving myself a good amount of time. And I do think about that 5-7 year statistic a lot. Rarely do I ever see pre-everything people who have thought about it deeply for 10 years regret it. Sometimes they don’t transition at all! And that’s okay, I would just prefer to know for certain, with a large time gap, than guess in the dark and play a risk.
Have a wonderful day u/Lottagain :)
Because my wanting to be the opposite sex has no effect on my belief towards the economy, who I will vote for, and why I serve my country. Frankly, it’s none of your business, as I only mentioned that to deter away people who feel the need to spill their beliefs about me serving “a country that hates your kind” lol. I’ve heard it all before and I’m not particularly interested in hearing it all again.
I will be getting my eggs frozen when I turn 18, as my family has a long history of hormone issues and over-fertility. I think I’m so okay with it, not necessarily because I don’t feel the disconnect between my body and how I feel, but mostly because, I don’t really feel the urgency. It was a no brainer for me to start hormones, but it’s a matter of when. Why would I start when I am not fully developed? That could be dangerous. I am also an aspiring physicist, and have always seen things from a more biological and practical standpoint. Hence the reason I am confused why people are telling me to NOT wait.
I asked a question about this earlier as I have been in therapy since I was very young, and do feel 100% accepting and open to talking about it now. I have come to terms with it, and most professionals I see, as I have been to many, just tell me that they aren’t sure how to approach it. Or they tell me that “it’s an interesting point of view” and move on. It’s very taboo these days.
I have always been what people described as strong willed, but I just see as logical. I do think it’s more difficult for people to understand why I would apply logic to something that is very emotion based like sexuality or gender identity. Thank you for your input, and I’m glad I posted here. I do like to consider my friends and families opinions, but I often have a difficult time accepting what they see over the way I see things and my intuition and such. Which can be good and bad. Regardless, I will wait, this post has helped me see that more than before.
Honestly, I’ve seen over 20 therapist in my life, and even went to a residential program made for adolescents. Even then, they wouldn’t really want to talk about that, or tell me that there are other things they want to work on. Currently I have a therapist who I kinda just rant to for an hour, who is a child psychologist lol.
My family has a history of hormonal imbalances, and my aunt, who I have recently discovered that I am very similar too in psychical shape and unfortunately most similar conditions that I will need surgery for. Her imbalance was so bad she had to have a hysterectomy, which is something my doctors have told me I will start experiencing around my 30s.
That being said, I am high risk for opposite sex hormones to really be a danger to me if not closely monitored. That and I’m not even totally developed yet.