This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user shares specific, detailed, and consistent personal medical and social experiences (e.g., surgical details, hormone timeline, workplace interaction) that are characteristic of a genuine detransitioner's narrative. The tone is passionate and personal, aligning with the expected perspective of someone who has lived this experience.
About me
I started transitioning because I hated going through puberty as a girl and felt my developing body was all wrong. I lived as a man for five years after taking testosterone and having top surgery. I stopped hormones because I realized I was trying to solve deeper mental health issues by changing my body. Now I've socially detransitioned and am finally dealing with my problems in a healthier way. I feel more stable and like myself, though I do have some regrets about my surgery.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started because I really hated going through puberty as a girl. I developed breasts around age 13 and I absolutely hated them; they felt completely wrong on my body and I was deeply uncomfortable. I think a lot of my feelings were wrapped up in a general discomfort with my body and some deep-seated self-esteem issues. I was also struggling with depression and anxiety, and I spent a lot of time online where I found communities that seemed to have all the answers. Looking back, I think I was heavily influenced by what I was reading and the friends I made in those spaces. It felt like an escape from all the things I was unhappy with.
I started identifying as non-binary first, and then that shifted to identifying as a trans man. I began taking testosterone when I was 19. I was on T for about five years. During that time, my voice dropped, I grew facial hair, and I passed as male. When I was 24, I had top surgery. I asked the surgeon to make me completely flat, but he left a small amount of breast tissue behind for "contouring," which I didn't really want. After surgery, I was a lot flatter, but not totally flat like I had hoped.
After being on testosterone for those five years, I stopped in 2021. My body started to change again. My voice got a bit higher—it settled into a deep woman's voice rather than a man's voice. My period came back, and it was much worse than before; it was longer and the cramps were terrible, so I started taking birth control to help manage that. Because I'm skinny, there wasn't a huge amount of fat redistribution, but the small amount of breast tissue that was left did grow back just a tiny bit. Emotionally, coming off hormones was really rough. My mood was all over the place, probably from the hormonal whiplash, and I ended up taking antidepressants for a while to help stabilize. Thankfully, that leveled out and I don't need them anymore.
I officially detransitioned in 2023. Telling people was scary, but my bosses were surprisingly understanding. I took a vacation day, they told everyone at work for me, and when I came back, all my stuff was updated with my birth name and everyone just moved on. It was a huge relief.
My thoughts on gender have really changed. I don't really believe in it the same way I used to. I think I was trying to solve deeper problems—like my low self-esteem, depression, and discomfort with puberty—by changing my body. I don't think that was the right solution for me. I do have some regrets, especially about the top surgery. I wish I had been completely flat, and I regret that a healthy part of my body was removed. I've even had trans people tell me it was a shame I had the surgery, not because I might regret it, but because I took the spot of someone who "desperately needed" it, which felt really hurtful and missed the point entirely.
I don't regret the entire journey because I learned a lot about myself, but I do regret not addressing my underlying mental health issues first. My mood is so much better now than it was when I was identifying as trans. I feel more stable and more like myself, and I'm finally dealing with my problems in a healthier way.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| 13 | - | Started puberty, hated developing breasts |
| 19 | - | Started taking testosterone (T) |
| 24 | - | Had top surgery (surgeon left some tissue) |
| 26 | 2021 | Stopped taking testosterone |
| 28 | 2023 | Socially detransitioned, changed name back |
Top Comments by /u/beemariiee:
I was on T for roughly 5 years and I had top surgery. My voice dropped and I grew facial hair so I passed pretty well. I went off T in 2021 and detransitioned in 2023.
When I went off T I did notice my voice went a little higher again (sounds like a deep woman’s voice rather than a high man’s voice), my period came back and it’s now longer and I get really bad cramps when before I rarely ever had cramps (I’m taking Lolo BC to help with this), I’m very skinny so not much fat redistribution but since my top surgeon left some breast tissue behind that grew a tiny bit. My mood in the beginning was super unstable, likely from messing with my hormones so bad, so I took Zoloft for a while but now I’ve leveled out and I don’t need the antidepressants anymore. My mood is way better now than when I was trans identifying but I’m not sure if that’s due to stopping T or due to detransitioning as a whole
I think a lot of trans people are so entrenched in their transition (because it’s so important to them) that it makes it hard for them to think about anything (or anyone) else. When you’re seeing the entire world through the lens of your own transition it’s probably very hard to “read the room” on detransitioner issues.
I try to give people grace but it is incredibly annoying. I’ve had trans people say to my face that it’s a shame I had top surgery, not because it was a removal of healthy body parts that I didn’t want removed, but because I took the place of a trans person who “desperately needed” that surgery.
I definitely get where you’re coming from and I don’t think you were being “transphobic”. I think people throw that word around way too easily these days
When I detransitioned I told my bosses and they agreed to tell everyone at work for me, I used a vacation day that day, and when I came back the next day all of my work stuff was updated with my new name (I went back to my middle name) and everyone moved on.
It depends if your surgeon left any breast tissue. I’ve had the smallest amount of regrowth (barely anything tbh) because my surgeon left some breast tissue behind for “contouring”. Im probably a just below a AA (I was a C before surgery) but not completely flat, although most of my tissue is focused to the side of my chest as that’s where my surgeon left tissue. But if you want to”breasts” again then you’ll need implants or fat grafting surgery
I had the same concern (I was also on T for 5 years) but after being off since 2021, friends I’ve known since pre-t have said my voice is pretty much back to the way it used to be. I don’t know how long you’ve been off T but maybe give yourself some time and see where your voice lands before making surgical decisions?