This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. The posts describe a nuanced, emotionally complex personal journey that is consistent with a genuine desister. The language is personal, reflective, and shows a natural evolution of thought over time. The anger expressed is specific and contextual, aligning with the passion and pain mentioned in your prompt. There are no obvious red flags of bot-like behavior or inauthenticity.
About me
I started questioning because I hated my birth name and associated being a girl with a lot of pain. I mistook my internal hell for gender dysphoria and used a trans identity as a way to hide from my life. I woke up from that fog feeling like I had lost a lot of time and memories. Now, I’ve reconnected with my past and I’m finally able to use my voice again to pursue my passions. I don’t regret exploring my identity, but I’m glad I found my way out.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started because I hated my birth name. It wasn't about gender at first. I’ve hated that name my entire life; it’s very basic and it’s tied to a lot of trauma for me. I don’t think it was dysphoria, I just genuinely hated the name. I started leaning towards the idea of being non-binary because I didn't really like gendered names anyway. I thought an original, made-up name would be way cooler.
Around that time, I put a male username on Discord and it made me feel happy and cool. I experimented with both female and male pronouns and liked them both, but using any pronouns felt tiring, so I mostly avoided them. I was really just trying to become comfortable with who I am. I remember talking with an old friend about our past, and those memories soothed my heart. They were from a time before I ever thought I was a girl. Being a girl, for me, was nothing but pain.
I had this constant hell in my mind that I was trying to get through. For a long time, I mistook that feeling for dysphoria. When I identified as trans, that hellish feeling went away, but it didn't bring me any real happiness or sense of accomplishment. I realize now that for me, being trans was a way of hiding. It was an excuse to give up on life, to live on the bare minimum, and I was slowly going insane. I felt like I had blacked out for a long time, and I barely have any memories from that period, other than the most hurtful ones that will probably stick with me forever. I just woke up back to reality all of a sudden.
I’ve never liked the idea of therapy or taking pills for myself, so throughout all of this, it was just me and my brain, trying to work things out on my own.
Looking back, I feel like the trans community tries to normalize being trans, acting like anyone could or should be trans. But the truth is, it's not normal—and by that, I don't mean it's bad, I just mean it's different. Only a tiny percentage of the population is trans, and you won't be treated as normal either. It’s a sad and unpleasant truth that people need to accept before considering if they are trans. A lot of trans people are emotionally fragile, which plays into the delusion that being trans will be easy and will make your life a living dream. I was once attacked in a trans group for saying that a lot of trans people have issues with their parents, which is just a fact they didn't want to accept.
They throw around terms like "transphobic agenda" to make it seem like the whole world is against them. But not everyone who disagrees with you is transphobic. The world doesn't revolve around you. My best friend is trans and she's wonderful, but the community itself can be filled with ignorance. They claim only 1% of people detransition, but if you look at Reddit, the numbers tell a different story. The main trans subs have about 100k people, and the detrans sub has 22k. That's 22% right there, and if you count the people who never found this sub, the number is probably closer to 30%. That’s a lot.
I don’t regret exploring my identity because it helped me understand myself better, but I do regret getting so lost in it. I’m glad I found my way out. The best part now is that I feel like I can use my voice again, and I can finally follow my passion to become a YouTuber and a singer.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Early Teens (before 2021) | Hated my birth name due to trauma, associated being a girl with pain. |
| 17 (May 2021) | Started questioning gender, leaned towards non-binary. Felt happy using a male Discord username. Experimented with pronouns but found them tiring. |
| 17 (May-June 2021) | Realized my "hellish" mental state was mistaken for dysphoria. Understood that identifying as trans was a form of escapism and giving up on life. |
| 17 (June 2021) | Began to "wake up" from the experience, feeling like I had lost time and memories. Started to detransition socially. |
| 17 (Present) | Reconnecting with my past self and feeling able to pursue my passions again. |
Top Comments by /u/benji696:
"TrAnSpHoBiC aGeNdA" you constantly make it seem like the whole world is against you with these big terms that in reality don't even mean anything in the end. Wake the fuck up, not everyone that disagrees you on personal topics is transphobic, because guess what bucko, not the whole world is against you. I never said that they say everyone should be trans, I said that the say that everyone and anyone could be trans, which is completely untrue. You say you don't think that the whole world revolves around you, yet you call anyone with a slightly different opinion that is or was in the same boat as you transphobic. My best friend is trans, i was trans, I love her and she's the best friend I could ask for. Another claim you make is that I didn't delve deeper, yet that completely goes against what I said, the deeper you go into the rabbit whole, the worse it gets. On the surface is where the community seems good, otherwise no one would even be in that community to begin with. The community is filled with ignorance, not everyone there is the way I'm claiming, but they don't realise that there are a lot of people between them like that. The community also claims that only 1% detransition. Yet most trans subs have 100k people on it max and the detrans one has 22k people, which is 22%, if were going solely based on reddit people count. If we count the detransitioners that never came on this sub, that number would be higher, probably close to 30%, which is a lot. There are not a lot of trans people that never joined a trans sub, because they seek constant validation, but I'm sure there are at least 5k detransitioners that never found this sub.
Not only they don't get any warning, but trans activists and the trans community tries to normalise it constantly, like anyone could or should be trans, when, in reality, they should accept that its not normal, and by not normal I don't mean something bad, I mean something different. 0,9% of the population is not normal. And you won't be treated like you are normal either. Even though it's sad and unpleasant, it's a sad and unpleasant truth that they should accept and anyone should accept before they even consider the possibility of being trans. A lot of trans people are really emotionally fragile from my experience, which helps play into their delusion that it will be easy to be trans, that it will make your life a living dream. I was once attacked on a trans group for saying that a lot of trans people have parents issues, which is facts that they chose to not accept.
I feel the exact same way, I barely have any memories left, other than the most hurtful ones which will probably stick with me forever, I feel like the whole time I just blacked out and time passed, only to wake up back to reality all of a sudden. I'm someone that doesn't like to go to therapy and is against the idea of pills for myself, so all of this time it was just me and my brain, working things out. your reply is the most relatable thing I've ever read though, thank you so much. It really means a lot to me that you gave words to my exact experience, except for the therapy part. Take care of yourself wonderful person
Also, there’s hell in my mind right now, that I’m trying to get through. This is what I mistaken as dysphoria for a long time, hell in my mind. I still don’t know what it is or how to get rid of it, but being trans got rid of it, but it didn’t actually bring me any happiness or self accomplishment, probably because for me being trans was actually hiding and finding excuses to give up on life, living on the bare minimum and slowly going insane.
Thank you so much for the reply, tbh it still feels weird, as I still hate my birth name, but mostly because it sounds very uncharacteristic of who I am, it’s very basic and it’s the source of a lot of trauma. I don’t think I feel actual dysphoria regarding it, since I’ve hated it from the moment I was born. I don’t really like gendered names either way, as I feel like an original made up name is way cooler. I’m leaning towards the non-binary side, but I’m still trying to become comfortable with who I am. I just put a male discord username and it made me happy, and it made me feel cool. Also been trying both female and male pronouns and I like them both, but both seem very tiring rn so I abstained from using pronouns much in the first place. I really hope I can get back to who I was and I haven’t lost myself too much in the process, as being a girl wasn’t anything but pain. Been talking with an old friend about us in the past and the memories really soothed my heart, back before I thought I was a girl. And the best part is, now that I feel like I can use my voice, I can finally follow my passion in becoming a YouTuber and a singer!! 💜
Thanks so much for the reply. It’s very reassuring and it just pulled me out of a dark place. It means a lot to me. I’ll probably keep posting updates on this subreddit throughout my journey as a journal that others can interact with, and maybe someone that goes through the same things as me can relate, and maybe that helps them. Again, thank you for everything!