This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or an inauthentic user.
The comments demonstrate:
- Personal, nuanced experience with dysphoria and therapy.
- Consistent, passionate ideology critiquing modern transgender concepts, which aligns with some desister/detransitioner perspectives.
- Emotional reactivity and a human writing style, including anger and sarcasm.
- Engagement in complex debate, showing an ability to process and respond to arguments.
About me
I started having intense genital dysphoria in my late teens, which I now see was deeply connected to my childhood sexual assault. I thought getting a penis would make me feel safe and powerful, but therapy helped me realize it was a trauma response, not a true need to be male. I never medically transitioned, and I'm so grateful I explored these root causes first. Now, I live comfortably as a female and understand my past feelings were about protection, not identity. My journey taught me the critical importance of addressing mental health before any medical decisions.
My detransition story
Looking back on everything, my journey with gender has been complicated and deeply tied to my past trauma. I was sexually assaulted as a child, and I think that played a huge part in the feelings I developed later. For a long time, I had what I called genital dysphoria, but it was strange. I didn't really have a problem with my body being female overall; my discomfort was very specific. I felt a strong desire to have a penis. I remember thinking that maybe a part of me believed having a penis would protect me, that there was some kind of power in having one. It felt like a shield.
I spent a lot of time in online communities, and I saw how a lot of people talked about transition. It seemed like everyone was saying that transitioning would solve all your problems, that it was a magic fix. I'm glad I was skeptical. I started to realize that for me, my feelings weren't really about being a man. They were tangled up with my trauma and a desire for safety. I was lucky to find a therapist who helped me work through this. We didn't just focus on affirming a transgender identity; we dug into the root causes. That therapy was incredibly helpful and really curbed my dysphoria, even though the feelings still flare up sometimes.
Through all of this, I've developed some strong thoughts on gender. I don't really understand what it means to "feel like a woman" or a man. What does that even feel like? To me, it often seems like people today use "gender identity" to describe their personality and interests, rather than a deep, physical dysphoria. I remember arguing with someone online who had a really fetishistic and misogynistic view of womanhood, and it made me angry. It confirmed for me that a lot of this stuff is based on stereotypes. I believe that for some people, being trans is a real thing based on a deep-seated incongruence with their physical sex, but I think the conversation has gotten really muddled.
I never took hormones or had any surgeries. My transition was entirely social and internal, and my detransition was about realizing that my feelings stemmed from other issues. I don't regret exploring my feelings, because it led me to understand myself better. But I am grateful that I didn't medically transition. I think if I had, I would have major regrets now, because it wouldn't have solved the real problem, which was my trauma. My advice to anyone questioning is to stay away from social media echo chambers, prioritize your mental health, and find a therapist who will help you explore the root causes of your feelings, not just affirm them immediately.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| My Age | Event Description |
|---|---|
| Early Childhood (exact age unknown) | I was sexually assaulted. |
| Late Teens (exact age unknown) | I began experiencing genital dysphoria, which I later connected to my childhood trauma. |
| Around age 20 (exact age unknown) | I started therapy that focused on the root of my dysphoria, not just affirmation. This was a major turning point. |
| Throughout my early 20s | I became active in online communities, forming my views on gender and realizing my feelings were not about being transgender. |
| Present Day (exact age unknown) | I live as a female and understand my past dysphoria as a response to trauma. I have no plans to medically transition. |
Top Comments by /u/bunz4daize:
Yeah, I have genital dysphoria too, except I was sexually assaulted as a child.
It’s strange, because I don’t really have much of an issue with my body being female aside from the lack of a fully functional penis. Maybe a part of me thinks a penis will protect me in a way? Like there’d be power in having one or something? I’m not sure.
All I can say is that therapy has helped me curb my dysphoria a lot, though it’s still there and does flare up sometimes.
No, I don’t believe in it. I have to agree that “feeling like a woman” (or a man, in any case) is such a strange concept to me because what does that even entail? What’s a “woman” supposed to feel like? So many people say this when asked about transitioning, but they can’t even define “woman”, let alone explain what being a woman is supposed to feel like.
Alternatively, I’ve asked older trans people about what gender identity meant and it was explained to me that it originally operated under gender and sex being synonymous and meant that you perceived yourself to be the opposite sex rather than the one you have. Tbh, this old definition makes the most sense.
Let me tell you guys something, girls can wear every single color excluded from NOTHING! have you guys seen the options with clothes? Want to wear boots? Shoot gun? Work on cars? Help your self and be empowered!
Please tell me you aren’t actually complaining about clothes... If women dress in a way that’s too “manly”, were shunned, harassed just as men are. Sure, the patriarchy holds men to this ridiculous standard of toxic masculinity where the way you dress and the things you’re interested in have to be stereotypically “manly”, but if women lean too far into masculinity too or ditch most or all of the feminine expectations pushed on us, we’re treated like shit too. Surprise! Gender is stupid and gender roles suck ass and we’re all boxed into them, whether we like it or not!
About 25% of every retail store is dedicated exclusively to your needs, have you ever seen a single father group residence? Nope, you won't, because people don't really want to help guys. Your chances of ending up homeless are a fraction of a man's, same with going to jail or being the victim of a crime or dying a violent death at work
Are you seriously bitching about us not free bleeding everywhere when we’re on our periods? Or complaining about skin/hair care products that you could use too? Really?
You have an entire gender that basically wants to make you happy, when you get married your partner saves u for months and gets down on one knee, you will be love We have an entire sex that want to fuck us. You’re absolutely delusional if you think all men are these caring, loving heroes that want to settle down and get married and have a family the good old-fashioned way. No one, not even other women, dedicate their lives to trying to make someone happy if they aren’t actually in love and planning to spend the rest of their days with that person. Most people just want to feel things out, make good memories, and have good times, not jump straight into commitment and especially not servitude to someone because they’re the opposite sex.
You know, I was originally going to break down your argument piece by piece, but I’ve already wasted enough time on your misogynistic, self-centered ass. You’re moaning about your boner for womanhood whilst simultaneously telling OP that her pain doesn’t matter because patriarchal society is patriarchal and also toxic toward men. You’re truly ignorant to think women don’t have problems just because they aren’t the same as a man’s, but you’re self-centered anyway, so even though women do share some of the same struggles that you listed off for men, you’ll happily ignore that for the sake of your self-pity circle jerk.
Anyway, tl;dr: you got downvoted to hell because you’re a creepy jerk with a fetish for womanhood and no actual respect for women.
I’d tell them two things:
Stay away from the social media crowd and do tons of research by yourself. Too many people pretend that transitioning is sunshine and rainbows and make it sound like all your problems will melt away if you transition and that’s just not the case.
Prioritize your mental health above all else. There’s this conception that transitioning is a physical thing, but truth be told, it’s honestly more mental. Go see a therapist, one that will try to get to the root of your dysphoria and caution you about transitioning the whole step of the way. Make sure that mentally, you’re prepared for the way your body could react to hrt and the changes that you’ll see. Make sure that above all else, you can except yourself regardless of the result, and acknowledge your sex, your reality without it being something that can break you.
I think these are the most important things, off the top of my head.
I’m not. I’m explaining to you how in modern times, the mainstream trans movement largely disregards the physical aspects of what makes a person trans- dysphoria. If anything, what I’m telling you is based on how most trans people describe “gender identity” today is synonymous with gender expression. Most trans people admittedly don’t have dysphoria, and transition for entirely different means than what most trans people transitioned for in the past. I hope that makes sense.
I know being trans is a real thing, and I know that it’s all about a mental incongruence between your mind and your body. I’m not sure if my initial comment made you think otherwise, and I don’t need scientific evidence of transgenderism.
Once again, it boils down to gender identity. The way that it’s used in modern day makes no sense, and the concept of “woman” and “man” is often referred to outside of physicality, which is what makes it so strange. People today use it to describe their personality and interests, rather than to explain physical, sex-based dysphoria.
Everything you said when describing yourself pretty much lines up with the original definition of “gender identity” and dysphoria that I’ve heard from older trans people.
Do you think, perhaps, it could be body dysmorphia? It’s not talked about often, but especially with how you feel about your chest- has your therapist ever brought that up as a possibility for you?
Edit to add: Congrats on being clean from cutting! That’s huge!!