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Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The comments display a consistent, nuanced, and personal narrative about detransitioning. The user offers specific, practical advice drawn from their own experience, which is characteristic of a genuine person sharing a lived reality. The tone is supportive and passionate, which aligns with the expected emotions of someone who has experienced harm.
About me
My journey started as a teenager with intense body hatred and an eating disorder, where I desperately wanted a more masculine shape. I realized it was strange that my treatment encouraged me to fight the eating disorder but supported changing my gender for the same feelings. I'm so glad I didn't medically transition and instead found strength training and masculine clothing to feel at home in my body. Now, I'm a happy, healthy butch woman who has learned to appreciate what my body can do. I see now that my discomfort was largely from puberty and low self-esteem, and I'm relieved I found a different path.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I hated my body intensely and desperately wanted to be flat-chested and muscular. I thought being "cool and hot" was so much better than being seen as "sweet and pretty." This feeling was wrapped up in a really bad eating disorder that got me hospitalized. It was during that treatment that I had a big realization: everyone was encouraging me to fight the eating disorder, but those same people were totally on board with supporting my gender dysphoria. It made me stop and question why we treat these two types of body hatred so differently.
Looking back, I think a lot of my discomfort was just plain puberty discomfort. I hated developing breasts and all the changes that came with being a young woman. I didn't have the words for it then, but I had very low self-esteem and was probably depressed. I thought changing my body was the only way to fix how I felt inside.
I'm so glad I didn't go down the medical path. Instead, I found ways to feel at home in my body that were completely under my control. The biggest thing for me was strength training. Building up my pec muscles made my chest appear flatter, and more importantly, it made me celebrate what my body could do instead of just how it looked. I fell in love with rock climbing and circus arts like trapeze and silks. Moving my body in that powerful way was a game-changer.
I also completely redid my wardrobe. I realized all my clothes were leftovers from what my mother had wanted me to wear. I sold or donated almost everything and built a new collection from thrift stores—button-up shirts, ties, and men's pants that actually felt like me. Learning to cut my own hair was huge, too. Sure, I had some fiascos where I had to wear a hat for a few weeks, but having complete control over my appearance was worth it. Tattoos and piercings also helped me feel like my body was a space I got to decorate and live in, rather than a trap I was stuck in.
Now, five years after that really hard time, I'm happy and healthy. I identify as a butch woman. I can't say I absolutely love my body every single day, but I'm tolerable of it most days, and that's a huge thing for me to say. I've learned that you can be hot, dress like a boy, be muscular, and live an awesome tomboy life. It doesn't make you any less of a woman, and it certainly doesn't mean you need to feel pressured into taking permanent hormones or getting surgery.
I don't regret my social exploration of gender because it helped me figure out who I am, but I am so relieved I didn't medically transition. I know now that my feelings were a combination of puberty discomfort, an eating disorder, and low self-esteem, and that medical intervention wouldn't have been the right solution for me.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| My Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 16 | Intense body hatred and puberty discomfort began. Developed an eating disorder. |
| 17 | Hospitalized for my eating disorder. Had my big realization about the differing treatment of ED vs. gender dysphoria. |
| 18 | Began socially exploring a more masculine presentation. Started strength training and rock climbing. |
| 19 | Completely overhauled my wardrobe to masculine-style clothes from thrift stores. Learned to cut my own hair. |
| 21 | Got my first tattoos, which helped me feel more at home in my body. |
| 22 (Now) | Comfortably living as a butch woman, happy and healthy, with no desire to medically transition. |
Top Comments by /u/cottagaco:
You'll be okay, I promise. You're not even 20 yet, you have so much time to start over. People are surprisingly accepting. They'll ask weird/invasive questions, sure, but even then you don't owe them an explanation. The biggest hurdle might be what other trans people have to say, but even then remember you don't need to explain or justify yourself at all. Hold your head high, I know you can do it. 💕
I promise you'll be okay. It doesn't invalidate what your feeling, but keep in mind that testosterone is a mood stabilizer. When you come off of it, it will take some time to find your balance of emotions again. It's 100% normal to feel like the world is ending. But I promise it's not. And you'll be okay. :)
(Had forgotten to give myself a flair before commenting, second try):
I was in the same situation as you in high school– hated my body, wanted to be flat and muscular and "cool and hot" instead of "sweet and pretty." After being hospitalized for my eating disorder, I realized: why did doctors, family, friends, etc. encourage fighting my ED but playing along with my gender dysphoria? I suggest you think through some of the same questions.
5 years later, I'm happy and healthy. I'm a butch woman now, and while I can't say I love my body, I'm tolerable of it most days, which is a huge thing for me to say. Some things that helped my gender dysphoria without going down the medical path:
strength training. Having more developed pec muscles can make your chest appear flatter, and celebrating what my body is capable of doing feels good. Rock climbing and aerial arts are my favorites that I recommend to anyone, but anything helps.
completey redoing my wardrobe. I realized that all my clothes were left over from what my mother wanted me to wear and convinced me to choose, not what I wanted. I sold, donated, recycled, etc. almost everything, and now have an awesome collection of button-ups, ties, and men's pants that I got from goodwill.
cutting my own hair. Learning to do my hair myself certainly had its fiascos where I wore a hat for a few weeks, but now that I'm in complete control over what my hair looks like, I don't regret it at all. It's fun to experiment and lets me present exactly the way I want to
tattoos!! They just make me feel cool :) I'd also recommend piercings, I just don't want any myself.
overall, just things that change my body in a way that I have control over. It makes my body feel more like a bedroom that I get to decorate and live in, rather than something I'm trapped in. I hope some of the above help you, too.
You can be hot, dress like a boy, be muscular, and live the awesome tomboy life of your dreams. And it doesn't make you less of a woman. And it certainly doesn't mean you should feel pressured into taking permanent hormones or top surgery.
I would argue against this– breasts on males, even via hormone treatment, are just another kind of fat distribution. Assuming OP stopped taking estrogen and such, their chest can go back to its original state via diet, exercise, and time. However, some effects, like others are commenting, are irreversible (ie enlarged nipples).
Yes! Sports have helped me so much. My top recommendations are (in order): circus arts (most major cities have studios that offer adult classes in trapeze, silks, lyra, etc.), rock climbing, strength training, long-distance hiking, and roller skating.