This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's narrative is detailed, emotionally nuanced, and internally consistent over time. They describe a specific, personal journey of detransition (including medical details like being on testosterone for three years), discuss complex motivations (trauma, internalized homophobia, societal pressures), and reflect on the ongoing process in a way that aligns with the passionate and often critical perspective found in the detrans community. The language is natural and lacks the repetitive, agenda-driven patterns of an inauthentic account.
About me
I was born female but never felt feminine enough, so I thought I was a trans man and took testosterone for three years. I realized I was just a lesbian using transition to escape my low self-esteem and fear of not being a "good enough" woman. I decided to detransition because I craved real independence and was tired of needing validation from others. Now I'm at peace being a female who is just herself, and my body has mostly returned to how it was before. I don't regret my journey because it was necessary for me to finally understand and accept who I am.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition was really about me trying to figure out who I am, and a lot of it came from a place of low self-esteem and not feeling good enough as I was.
I was born female, but I was always a bit androgynous growing up. I had a lot of male friends and was into things that people see as "masculine." I felt really anxious and scared that other girls would judge me or think I was a "pick me" girl, trying to get male attention. It turns out I was just a lesbian who wasn't impressed by men, and I had a lot of internalized homophobia and misogyny that made me terrified of other girls. I already felt like I was bad at being a girl, and I was scared of being mocked by girls who seemed to be doing it right.
All of these feelings built up into what I thought was gender dysphoria. I started spending a lot of time online and with trans people, both non-binary and male-to-female, and it just reinforced the idea that I couldn't be a woman because I wasn't feminine. I eventually identified as a trans man and started taking testosterone. I was on T for close to three years.
But deep down, I always knew that even with hormones and maybe surgery, I would never actually be male. What I really wanted was to be taken seriously and to feel comfortable in my own skin. I realized I was using transition as a way to escape from my problems and to seek approval from others. I was very dependent on romantic partners for validation.
I decided to detransition after nearly three years on hormones. The decision was partly due to concerns about my health and finances, but mostly because I craved independence. I was tired of needing people to validate me as male to feel okay. I missed my last shot of T and never went back. Telling my mom was surprisingly easy; we had a chat over breakfast and I just explained that I felt better off T and talked about my dysphoria being linked to self-esteem issues and realizing I was gay.
Detransitioning for me wasn't about going back into the closet. It was an act of rebellion against my own dysphoria. I decided to just "let myself be" without defining myself with any labels. Now, "woman" just describes the body I was born with, and it no longer feels like a word that restricts how I look or act. I refused to "refeminize" myself. I don't voice train, and I only shave my face. I still think femininity is impractical and ridiculous, and that's okay. Masculine women have always existed.
The physical changes after stopping T were significant. My period came back only two months after my last injection. Around the one-year mark, my skin got really soft again, my acne cleared up, and my body hair decreased a lot. My facial hair grows slower and is less thick. I did experience some weird changes with my breasts, like them getting itchy and feeling fuller, which freaked me out a bit, but I think it was just part of the process.
Since detransitioning, I've had very few issues. Sometimes people "sir" me on the phone, and once two classmates asked if I was a trans woman, but it doesn't bother me. Compared to the stress of trying to pass as male, it's minor. I took a long break from dating to become less dependent on others for approval, and it helped a lot. I'm only into women, and being detrans hasn't been a problem in dating. I'm just careful to avoid people who would use my insecurities against me.
I don't regret transitioning because it was a necessary part of my journey to understanding myself. But I am glad I detransitioned. It made me more independent and allowed me to make peace with being a female who is just herself.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Around 18-19 | Started identifying as trans and began taking testosterone. |
| 21-22 | Had my last injection of testosterone and began detransitioning. Told my mother. |
| 22-23 | (One year off T) Period returned, skin softened, acne cleared, body hair decreased significantly. |
| Present (age not specified) | Living as a detransitioned female, comfortable with my body and identity as a lesbian. |
Top Comments by /u/crunchwrap-soup:
of course!! I still think femininity is unpractical and ridiculous, I don't think that's going to change. To be honest reddit is the only place where I've seen this much detransitioned women worry about being feminine enough. Even though I've been on T, I personally can't even be bothered to voice train or shave anywhere else but my face. It's like that for a lot of us I think, masculine women have always existed
I was anxious about that too before detransitioning yet I didn't feel like doing any voice training (I decided to detransition to just "let myself be" and refused to "refeminize" myself beyond maybe growing my hair out) so here's the worse that happened to me so far in regards to my voice since I detransitioned last year: -People sometimes sir'd me over the phone -Two classmates asked if I was a trans woman And that's it! I honestly hardly ever think about it now. Most of the time people are too shy to point out that kind of stuff. The two classmates that asked did so because they're from the young woke being very loud about supporting lgbt rights crowd. Even though it rarely happens and comes as a surprise when it does happen, I feel nothing when people sir me over the phone. Compared to the discomfort I felt as a trans man, trying to pass and dealing with dysphoria when getting misgendered, its all so fucking minor; I don't regret it one bit
It has but it's a bit complicated? My whole thing with detransition was coming to terms with being gay and get rid of my addiction to people's approval as a mean to function.
I used to be very dependant on romantic partners and wanted a clean break from dating for at least a year! Which I achieved
I recently re-downloaded tinder but since we're on a lockdown (and I'm not at all interested in long distance) I haven't been getting any action lol. Im not too worried tbh! I just want things to happen naturally so if me being detrans is going to be a deal breaker for someone it just wasn't meant to be and that's fine.
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Yes it’s normal! A clitoris is a clitoris no matter how enlarged, there’s no such thing as a clit being penis like even if you were on T. It’s just something they say in the trans community to keep the gender euphoria delusion going, don’t let it bring you down
I'm only into women and it hasn't been an issue. I still get hit on by males occasionally for some reason...I close shave almost everyday and am open about being detrans but I didn't voice train and have no interest to. You'll always be able to find someone no matter what you look like imo, just be careful of people who will use your insecurities to keep you meek and conciliant in the relationship.
That might be right, it seems the detrans women who feel pressured to appear more feminine are distressed and making posts to ask for advice and direction about it, how to "retransition" if they pass as female etc. that generates a lot more traffic in the subreddit than detransitioning because you don't care what you pass as and just want to live your life.
Oh wow first I'm sorry and I really feel for you. Being a good friend is cool and all but you had the right idea when you got a bit annoyed at them for saying they could wear skirts now that they were nonbinary.
I'm a woman and grew up androgynous so I really relate to a lot of what you're saying in this post!
I also had lots of male friends and felt scared people were thinking I was acting like a pick me. Turns out I'm just lesbian with traditionally "masculine" interests, completely unimpressed by men and due internalized misogyny+homophobia, I was terrified of girls. I already felt like I was doing this whole being a girl thing wrong, I didn't want succeeding girls to judge or mock me on top of it!
As you can guess all this stuff fueled my dysphoria and I eventually identified as trans. Spending a lot of time with amab trans people, be it nonbinary or mtf, did not help my dysphoria at all. It only reinforced the idea that I was somehow not a woman because I wasn't feminine. When I detransitioned I decided to just start being without defining myself.. I know it's not something the majority of the trans community is on board with, but now woman only describes the body I was born with. And only then did I feel like it's no longer a word restricting my behavior and appearance.
Marginalized trans people face real problems such as male violence and prostitution, androgynous women with she/her pronouns isn't one of them. Any activism making you feel like your way of being actually wants trans people dead is the problem, you aren't! Keep doing you.
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Recently hit the one year off T mark after being on it for close to 3 years here's how it went down : my period came back two months after my last injection which is pretty quick I think? Anyway when I hit the one year milestone I started seeing very sudden changes I didn't even know I was hoping for. my skin got really soft like it was pre-T. My face really started clearing up, the painful acne is all gone. I used to get some of it on my shoulders too and that's started to slow down as well. The body hair dramatically decreased : I don't have anything visible on my stomach or breasts anymore; and the facial hair is way less thick and grows back slower. the skin also doesn't get as irritated when I shave and I don't get much of a shadow.
Not being able to pass as male or see yourself as male doesn't make you a failure. The idea of passing as the opposite sex is like chasing clouds, it can never truly be done to completion in my opinion. Don't blame your body for that fact. Gender dysphoria is painful, having everyone recognize you as female in a sexist society is also extremely painful and dangerous. Since the day you were born you were treated less for being female, please realize that wanting to pass as male doesn't make you a fool. To answer your question, I went back on my decision after three years of hormone and a name change but it wasn't like going back into the closet. My past with transition is still there. I made the jump into detransition out of concern for my health and financial situation but more than anything I craved not needing people to validate me as male to feel alright. Detransition made me more independent.
I've always known that even if I could maybe pass under certain angles, light, with hormone therapy and surgeries and strategically picked clothing, it wouldn't make me male ("cis man"). Which is what I really wanted in the end. And I wanted that because I grew to hate my body and wanted to be taken seriously in society. I deserve to be taken seriously and feel comfortable about my female body without throwing cash at hormones and surgery so I detransitioned; to me it's an act of rebellion against gender dysphoria and everyday I'm glad I did it.
(I lived with them at the time this happened) I first gradually stopped binding and caring about passing. I told my mom over breakfast in the morning, which is when we usually chat. She was accepting of trans identities and ideology for my sake but always a bit worried about treatment side effects so it went well. I just said something along the lines of "I missed my last shot of T and I won't be taking T anymore, I feel better this way" then talked a bit about health concerns I had with T, dysphoria caused by self esteem issues due to trauma and homosexuality. It was less of a coming out and more of an honest update on my life and what I planned to do from now on.