yeah some ppl like to hide stuff. but this shit happens.

You may not believe it, but I had a mod of asktg repetitively ask me to meet IRL. That person had said they were over 40. I had unfortunately said where I was, and they had realized I was just 1 state over. They wanted to drive and meet me. That's like pedo grooming behavior, as I had not hidden my age, and I wasn't stupid/starry eyed enough to not see how abnormal the whole thing was.

Unfortunately, trans, detrans, ally, or cis, the amount of mentally damaged ppl is high enough in the trans community to warrant extra precaution: never give details about yo,ur personal life, never allow them to find you IRL, never trust anyone.

I've had trans stalkers before, just bc I have no problem admitting my political opinions (I'm GC, shoot me, but the trans community made me become that by its abuses), so now I'm super careful

well, we can be allies without intruding too much and while being respectful - but maybe making a post about that is not the best way.

Imagine a post entitled " A message from a Gender Critical person"

Then you realize you are putting your own identity forward, centering the sub on yourself instead on the people it's about...

So maybe hang around and try to help regarding voice issues, skin/hair issues etc just like you would on a trans sub??

Still, we can help: what mtfs know is helpful to ftmtfs for example, that seem to make a majority of this sub

Of all the bad reasons to transition that strikes me as one of the worst: basically to stop being treated like a lesser human you want to risk hurting your healthy body that you do not hate? So that you can move to another city and restart as stealth?

Immigration is a better option. Not all places are like that.

The truth is I and many other detrans people have been abandoned by the healthcare professionals who helped us transition, not even necessarily out of malice but just purely out of not knowing what to do about it.

Even without being detrans, I know the feeling of abandonment by the healthcare system - it's a rigged system, where healthcare professionals do not see patients, but the money these patients can bring them.

So I wouldn't be as charitable as you are in my interpretations. They are just in for the money. They don't care much more than that.

In theory they would, but for them, we're just their job: walking dollar signs they can shake for money.

I see multiple questions here a day from other detrans people asking questions and talking about being scared and confused about what’s happening to their body while detransitioning

Doctors know very little about transition or detransition. The amount of knowledge available online is tremendous!

This is why I hang around here as an ally. I learned many things about drugs and surgeries during transition. I dislike the modern trans community and it's political orientation. So I try to help here instead.

And trans or detrans, you're all my (formerly) trans brothers and sisters. The "formerly" part change nothing. I want to help you if I can.

I gave up after high school and have been in a shut in for a few years but next year I’m going to try start with biology anyway

As a fellow dropout, I understand. Maybe you will find enough motivation?

I live in a small country and I’d ideally eventually move to somewhere accessible to much more people like the US or Canada or the UK

As someone who immigrated several times, I understand the feeling. But you may want to study in your country. I've immigrated to then studied in the US, is expansive and hard.

I’m 22 and considering how many kids and teens are transitioning I think if I worked hard I’d be there to help when one of the the biggest waves of detransitioners hits.

And what if there isn't? Or if it comes much later???

I say that bc while passion is good, having a good job is better. And there are multiple ways to help!

Being a nice and compassionate doctor that provide healthcare on the cheap at an income adjusted clinic would already be very good!

These unicords exist: they are very rare, but I have seen at least one of them in the wild at the gay clinic I was going to.

There are quite a few of us who are GC and trans. Let's be honest, the main GC sub had turned into a cesspool after having been infiltrated by the altright. It was GC by name only.

What the mods did may have been wrong, but it will be the opportunity to start anew, on better basis

For me, transition was a first step out. After having been a target as a GNC kid in a regressive country, it felt freeing.

Then I realized I had traded a prison for another one. I adopted the GC philosophy and found more freedom.

Now I don't give much care about all that gender stuff. I dress with whatever clothes I like. Mix and match, and refuse to adopt any "role" or anything. For ex, I refuse to wear bras. I like to say my mom and grandma didn't burn theirs just so I could wear one lol

I also like to have king days every now and then with a nice suit, a cool tie, and a cigar. It's my middle finger to gender.

So yeah, I don't assume "real roles" I guess, but you know, gender and gender roles are just an illusion. There's nothing inherently male or female in anything you said. Like, making money is a need for every single one of us.

Wonderful writing, thank you! I am also one of those who has been set free by GC ideology.

I believe it is extremely helpful to stop being delusional about things we can't change, to focus instead on the things we can! This has been the way of the stoics since Seneca.

To some people with gender dysphoria, this means using our limited science to change their appearance in a way that make them more comfortable with themselves - and that's good!

To some other people, this means not transitioning in the first place, or detransitioning - and that's good too!

Because the goal is happiness. transition, detransition and all that are just ways to happiness. It is a mistake to confuse the goal, and the way.

And we are all very different so there isn't just one way to happiness :)

He has a mechanist view on the body. I can agree with that, as I don't believe in gendered brains, the immortal soul, and all of that.

However, I would urge extreme caution regarding this various claims. You may not know him here, but he is well known on subs like transdiy. Basically, his methods are a mix of A) "best practices" of what the community has found out to be working and safe, with the validation stamp of a doctor (and that's good) but also B) "not yet best practices" that he's found, whether on research, reddit, or I god knows where, and believes can work.

For A), it's fine. It's more that fine - there're a few wonderful things, like clomid to help regain fertility, sublingual to reduce the doses and thus the risks, unconventional antiandrogen at very low doses to reduce the risks and side effects, topical DHT to help with facial hair. It's great, seriously. I have a lot of respect for Powers.

For B), problems can happen. He's also well known to recommend various things like Boron to supplement estrogens, piling up oral estrogens on top on injectables, suggesting progestrone etc. to help with breast growth, while there is litteraly no evidence it may help - and, more troubling, evidence that it may be counter productive or dangerous.

Problem is how you separate A from B???

I'm here as an ally, to help you with drug and sugery questions. I'm just Darth from the internet who cook drugs at home, but I care about my trans and detrans brothers and sisters. I will NOT recommend things I consider dangerous. And I will point out things I consider safe and would do or have done on myself.

You don't need to take me on my word. There're others besides me - Kay, Aly, and many others doing litterature reviews to figure things out, because we have little (to no) trust in the commercial drugmakers. Trans medicine is fringe. Detrans medecine even more so.

It is not up to us to decide your objectives. You tell the problem, and we help you fix it. But if you have transitioned, you may have seen the other size of the mirror - how medicine is often a bunch of hacks, people interested more in your $$$ than in helping you. Now that you're detransitionning, please don't make the same mistake again. I'm not saying he's a quack - far from it. Just that some of the things he recommend, based on his experience, he shouldn't recommend in my opinion.

The only solution: educate yourself. Don't trust people on the internet or even doctors. Just consider us as resources pointing you to some direction, because the only person who'll have to support the consequences is you. He's one more resource - great! But use some caution.

it is not a unique experience. even without detransitioning, I feel like that about my pretransition pictures.

however, I do not feel like that to pictures as a kid, even if I look very different from now (darker skin, different gender)

and conversely, even pre transition, I remember I felt this same derealization from pictures tied to a very traumatic event that got me in a hospital for many month.

I'm giving you these examples, bc I think what you experience is derealization as a defense mechanism: it is not what may looks like you or not, but the circumstances around that time that, due to being hurtful, make your brain "disconnect"

Think about that as a kind of retrospective dissociation, where you brain prevents you from feeling hurt now by making the old you a "not you"

Was your transition tied to or driven by trauma?

but lets say you develop C cups during HRT, will they stay that big or shrink a bit? Also will they become sagging breasts or stay "full"?

Some breast growth will go away, especially if recent/low volume. Most wont. And no, you won't get C unless if you are a rare oddity. AAA is the median. Less that 50% get even A

Once body hair is reduced will it come back?

body hair is unaffected mostly

Also, what is about a lasered beard/legs?

lasered follicule = dead. unless you believe in zombies it won't come back from the dead

What is about the female shape, hips, butt, legs, belly? Will it stay like this?

If you experienced pelvis growth (rare, even before 25), it won't go away. Bones are bones

Fat whether subcutaneous or hips will go away

I just wish to have a slightly more feminine body. So I am wondering if I could achieve this with 3-6 months on HRT once and have the effects my remaining life, i.e. female shaped belly/hips/butt/legs and less body hair.

that's not how it works. get laser and eventually cosmetic surgery if you want to change your male look. Laser is harmless. Cosmetic surgery, less. But hey, you do you

Is it easier to get and maintain if one was in HRT for some months?

no. effects of E are very small and quick to go away. You would have to keep taking at least topicals like gels.

I would suggest you scrape these ideas and learn to be comfortable with yourself.

You can't just play with stuff like that. You should learn from the experience of the people here.