This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's writing is highly personal, nuanced, and emotionally complex. They share a consistent, detailed narrative of their own transition and detransition experience spanning many years, including specific personal struggles, psychological insights, and physical changes. The tone is passionate and opinionated, which aligns with the expected perspective of a genuine detransitioner. The language is natural, with conversational quirks and emojis, and the advice given is thoughtful and varied, not repetitive or scripted.
About me
I first felt like I wasn't a girl when I was five, but I now see that was just me not fitting into gender stereotypes. I transitioned at 19 and was on testosterone for seven years, and I'm grateful I never had surgery. My journey was driven by internalized homophobia and using transition as an escape from my problems as a homosexual woman. I started detransitioning a year ago, and the most important part was letting go of the entire transgender framework to find peace. I'm now content, finally at peace with being female, and I understand that my old dysphoric feelings were just insecurities I had to work through.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition started when I was very young. I was five years old when I first remember feeling like I wasn't a girl. This feeling of being "neither" was strong and stuck with me. I now see that as a normal feeling for a kid who didn't fit into typical gender roles, not a sign I was born in the wrong body.
I started my social transition in my late teens and began taking testosterone when I was 19. I was on it for about seven years. I never got top surgery or bottom surgery. I'm grateful I didn't alter my body surgically because I now know I would have regretted it, especially losing sensation.
My reasons for transitioning were complicated. A big part was internalized homophobia. I'm a homosexual woman, and I struggled with the idea that I couldn't have children with another woman. That felt like a deep wound connected to my worth. I was also a huge escape artist, always running from my problems, and transition became my biggest escape. I think my discomfort with puberty and my body was also mixed up with general low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety.
A major turning point was when I felt pressured by the trans community to conform to ideas I wasn't comfortable with. I realized I wasn't bigoted for being a homosexual female; that's just who I am. This bad experience was a wake-up call that started me questioning everything.
I decided to detransition about a year ago. The most important part of my detransition wasn't just stopping testosterone; it was completely changing my mindset. I stopped thinking in "trans terms" altogether. I don't use words like transgender, cisgender, dysphoria, or even man and woman to define myself or others much anymore. I just am a female. Someone thinking I'm a man doesn't make me one, just like someone thinking I'm a teenager doesn't make me one.
Letting go of that entire framework was what finally brought me peace. I treated my dysphoria like an insecurity—I acknowledged the feeling but refused to let it decide my life. It was really hard at first. I had weird, uncomfortable sensations about my body and my voice felt strange. I had to just endure those feelings, cry when I needed to, and distract myself. Over time, it got much better.
I don't regret transitioning because it was a part of my life for so long—almost twelve years—and it led me to where I am now. But I do believe that addressing mental distress with physical changes is not the right path. I benefited from therapy that wasn't about affirming my trans identity but about helping me understand my own mind.
Now, I’m content. I go to the gym, I live my life. The thoughts still pop up sometimes—what if I had surgery?—but I know now that those thoughts are just thoughts. They don't mean I need to change my body. I’m finally at peace with being a female, and that is incredibly freeing.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 5 | First remembered feeling like I "wasn't a girl" and was "neither." |
| Late Teens | Began socially transitioning. |
| 19 | Started testosterone. |
| 26 | Stopped testosterone and began detransitioning (socially and medically). |
| 27 | Now, living detransitioned and at peace. |
Top Comments by /u/dayfograinshine:
mine shrunk a bit, but when >!aroused!< it grows to the same size when i was on testosterone while >!aroused!<
i wouldn’t recommend surgically altering your genitals, sensation is a risk that you don’t want to take, including that you don’t want to risk being unhappy with another alteration
i think that anyone who is disconnected from their sex enough to identity differently is experiencing gender distress; i feel that anyone who is transitioning whether it is social, medical, cares a lot more about gender than they should or care more than is healthy
everyone’s disconnection works differently; i think this kind of question is akin to someone asking “how do you have OCD if you aren’t organized?”
you can be disconnected from your body enough to where some things might be painful, some things might not be painful, + that can change over time in various ways for many reasons
although it was brief for me, i did have a feminine phase during transition + even though my breasts were obvious i was still read as a man; it was kinda like a “power play” in a way for me, where i thought of myself as effortlessly passing; that’s one way to look at it, there can be many reasons as to why they express themselves where it’s obvious that they are female
therapy is not about them trying to convince me to not transition, that is completely my own decision
it’s not that i don’t think i’m trans, it’s that i don’t think of trans at all; i don’t think in trans anymore, that was my turning point where trans became unnecessary in my life, transition as a concept doesn’t make sense to me (anymore)
sure i still have gender issues, but i address them + process them outside of the concept of transness, like how when i began being atheist i processed things outside of religion or the concept of god (+ i don’t say that in a negative way, i don’t view religion negatively)
we have transitioned + so yes! we can speak on these things + offer differing perspectives
i personally do not feel obligated to cater to ideas + feelings of people who do not care about mine, it can be taken into account but ultimately if people who act like that cannot stand critiques then critiques is exactly what they need!
i don’t feel that masculinity makes me a man or that not being feminine makes me not a woman; i’ve learned that changing myself doesn’t make me into anything, so why change again when it’s unnecessary
i personally don’t care about being “misgendered” all of those worries were “trans worries” for me that i’ve left behind; someone perceiving me as a man doesn’t make me one, someone perceiving me as hispanic doesn’t make me hispanic, someone thinking i’m a teenager when i’m in my twenties doesn’t make me a teenager, etc no one’s perception of me is that powerful since i am still a woman regardless of what they think
ex-trans is an odd term to me, something about it feels off that i can’t adequately describe; being detransitioned in my view is not the same as being ex-gay, i don’t see trans + being homosexual as within the same realm even though we can heavily overlap in population
i can’t say for sure; i wouldn’t say detrans unless you had a medical transition, but at the same time desisted refers to only having a social transition which you didn’t have either
but what you went through is still significant + your dysphoria affected how you see yourself + interact with the world + it took time to start healing those parts of you
i’m not a gatekeeper, really, + i appreciate your post; i relate to your struggle as a homosexual albeit i am female + i transitioned; use what is comfortable for you but also be aware of your surroundings + how you identify yourself, so that you’re not misrepresenting your experience
i also never truly hated being female, i hated that i could not have children with another woman, + for some reason it’s a deep wound for me + it is probably a result of my upbringing + my worth as a woman
you struggled with what we call “dysphoria” + that is definitely an experience most of us can relate to for sure
i’m not sure where to start with my experience, i understand transitioning because of homophobia + whatnot albeit i’m less gender nonconforming now; i am a huge escape artist, all my life, + i still escape constantly although no longer through transition
although i feel like i’ve passed the need for community in terms of sexuality + gender things (although they are still wonderful + i love the people i’ve met), just raising my hand to say hey i’m here too + i’m fairly open
if you want to be feminine + beautiful while being recognized as your bio sex, then of course that’s your prerogative. go for it! it’s always your right. femininity + beauty are not synonymous with being a woman, but being a feminine + beautiful woman is a nice existence as well