This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account "fartmaster000" appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic user.
The comments display a consistent, personal narrative of detransitioning after taking testosterone, expressing complex emotions like regret, self-forgiveness, and criticism of trans influencer culture. The language is passionate and nuanced, reflecting the stated perspective of a desister who was a teenager when they medically transitioned. The account engages with the community by offering support to others, which aligns with expected behavior.
About me
I started as a teenager who felt uncomfortable with puberty and being a masculine girl, and I was convinced online that my feelings meant I was a trans man. I got testosterone prescriptions with almost no questions asked, and I ignored my gut feeling that it was wrong. The changes didn't make me happy, and I felt pressured by online communities to only show a positive experience. A personal crisis forced me to be honest with myself, and I realized I needed to detransition. I'm now learning to forgive myself and accept that I can just be a woman.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started when I was a teenager. I saw a lot of stuff online, especially on places like TikTok, that made being trans seem like the answer if you felt any kind of discomfort. I've always struggled with anxiety and intrusive thoughts, and I think that played a big part in why I latched onto the idea so hard. I felt a disconnect, and the online world I was in was quick to label that as being transgender.
Looking back, I think a lot of my feelings were just normal puberty discomfort and a general unhappiness with myself. I hated the changes my body was going through, like developing breasts. I was a masculine girl, and it felt like the only option presented to me was that I must be a boy. This "egg culture" is really damaging; it tells young people that any gender nonconformity means you're trans. I saw it everywhere: if a girl is masculine, she must be a trans guy. It made it hard to just be a girl who doesn't fit the stereotype.
When I was 17, I decided to transition. The process was shockingly fast. I had a 15-minute appointment with a psychiatrist and one short visit with a doctor, and I got a prescription for testosterone. My therapist at the time even told me I could start without my parents' consent, which I now find really concerning. My brain was screaming at me that this was wrong, but I ignored that feeling. I thought my anxiety and doubts were just intrusive thoughts that would go away once I started T. I believed the narrative that hormones would fix everything and make me happy and confident.
But it didn't work like that. The doubts never went away. I saw all these trans influencers online who were skinny, attractive "twinks" talking about how T made them so sexy, and I felt like I couldn't live up to that. They only showed the good parts, and if you had a bad experience, like hair loss or not looking the way you hoped, you were made to feel like it was your own fault for having "bad genetics." It felt really toxic.
The real turning point came last year, in September, when I had a really bad experience with drugs that triggered intense depersonalization. It was terrifying, but it forced me to be honest with myself. During the following months, I finally accepted that I hated the way I was living. I had breakdowns because I was so scared of admitting I was wrong and that I had messed up my life. I realized I didn't like changing my biology and I was scared of the long-term effects of testosterone.
I came to understand that although I sometimes wish I had been born male, I wasn't. I started to miss my old self and accept that it's okay for me to be a woman in this lifetime. The effort and stress of living as a trans person forever was just too much. I'm still working on forgiving myself. I was just a teenager trying to figure things out. It was only a few years of identifying as trans and one year on T, and I know I'm going to be okay.
I don't regret my transition in the sense that it was a part of my journey to understanding myself, but I do regret how easily I was able to access hormones as a minor without any deeper exploration of my anxiety and self-esteem issues. I think my experience shows that for some people, transition isn't the answer, and that's a truth that should be allowed to exist without being mocked. The same people who preach "live your truth" are often the first to get angry when someone's truth leads them away from being trans. My truth was that I needed to detransition, and that's okay.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| My Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Early Teens | Started feeling intense puberty discomfort and hated developing breasts. Felt disconnected and struggled with anxiety and low self-esteem. |
| Around 16-17 | Heavily influenced by online "egg culture"; came to believe my gender nonconformity meant I was a trans man. |
| 17 | Had very brief medical appointments; was prescribed testosterone after a 15-minute psychiatric appointment. |
| 17-18 | Lived as a trans man for about a year while on testosterone. Continued to have deep doubts and anxiety. |
| 18 (September) | Had a bad drug experience that caused depersonalization, leading to a crisis and the beginning of my detransition realization. |
| 18 (Late in the year) | Stopped taking testosterone and began socially detransitioning back to living as a woman. |
| Now (18/19) | Working on self-forgiveness and accepting myself as a masculine woman. |
Top Comments by /u/fartmaster000:
It’s so funny how some of them will say ”if you question your gender you’re probably not cis” and quite literally try to convince people to transition when they display any sort of gender nonconformity and then be like “U WERE NEVER TRANS!” When they decide transitioning isn’t for them… it’s like they preach so hard about “being who you are” and “finding yourself” until that journey brings someone ti realize they aren’t trans, then suddenly finding yourself isn’t a good thing anymore. Also, I very much did experience years of my life as a trans person, and who are you to try to downplay that? Mind you it’s usually non-dysphoric non binary people who still present as their agab who like to tell people “u were never trans” babe I probably experienced more as a trans person than you just changing your pronouns but let’s not talk about that 😕
I’ve always noticed this about the trans community. Like how are you going to advocate for living your truth and finding yourself until someone’s truth ends up not being trans. A lot of trans people on tiktok (so chronically online trans people) get livid at detransitioners just existing and talking about their experience, even if they have nothing bad to say about the trans community. I find it so odd how their whole thing is about “being who you are” but they’re mad when people aren’t trans. They also love just making fun of detransitioners for some reason and it’s so weird. If you know what it’s like going through transition why are you laughing at and mocking detrans people as if you know their experience or what they went through
I also notice that a lot of the ftm influencers people look up to are always young skinny guys that look like teenagers. People will be upset that transitioning made them look older than they are, experienced very early hair loss and they don’t feel attractive and they get told by all these ftm twinks that “it’s your problem not ours”. These people promote that transitioning turns them into a “sexy twink” then make fun of people when t makes them look like an ugly dude. The reason transitioning looks so appealing to young girls is because they think they’re gonna look like all these trans influencers who look like cute teenaged boys
Omg the part about all of the conventionally attractive trans influencers. I’ve seen soooo many of them talking about “t will make you so sexy” “t made you bald? That sucks but I have good genetics” “I used to be ugly but t made me so attractive” like do they not realize how toxic that is? Like by all means they should be able to celebrate their new confidence but… I also notice that it’s only conventionally attractive trans people who get big platforms. People only see the “good parts” of transition because all of the creators people made popular are skinny attractive people. And then if one person dares to speak out about the bad parts of their transition people clown on them and are like “ohh that sucks for you I guess you have bad genetics but a lot of us are sexy!” Like it’s sooo weird
Yeah i dont really think there’s justification for kids going on hormones, especially when there are healthcare workers that encourage kids to start hrt without a parents consent. When I was 17 my therapist was like “you can just start t without your parents consent” like huh?? It took me a 15 minute appointment with a psychiatrist and one very short visit with a dr to get my t prescription when I was a minor. Super weird. Teenagers brains are not fully developed enough to make a decision like that at all
No because let’s genuinely talk about how in this generation any sort of gender nonconformity always = trans. Like god forbid a woman be masculine or a man be feminine. And I feel like it would be way more normal for people to just be gnc if it weren’t for “egg culture” telling literal children and teenagers that they’re trans for having feelings that don’t align with their genders stereotypes. Egg culture is so fucked up and I always thought it was even when I identified as trans. Like why are you so obsessed with getting young people to transition. Like way to go for confusing young kids who are just trying to find themselves and making them believe that their only option is to transition if they feel any sort of disconnect from their sex or gender. Like somebody will say “sometimes I think it’d be cool to be a guy but I’m definitely a girl and not trans” and then there’s a shit load of people like “the egg will crack” “remind me in a few years” “denial” it’s actually kinda gross
Like I don’t think there’s anything wrong with exploring your identity but it seems to be getting easier for young teenagers to get access to gender affirming care and it kinda worries me that some of them are going to do something they shouldn’t. A few years ago it was pretty uncommon to meet a trans person but now they’re like… everywhere? And I’m being so genuinely serious when I say I know of like 20 trans guys through my highschool and mutual friends but I’ve yet to meet a trans girl, at least to my knowledge.
I felt like the entire time the deepest part of my brain was trying to tell me I shouldn’t do it. I pushed it under the rug for the longest time because I didn’t take my intuition seriously. I’ve always struggled with anxiety and intrusive thoughts and I thought that was the reason I was having these thoughts. Even in the earlier stages of my transition I had these feelings but thought it would all go away once I went on t. Well it didn’t! Last year in September I had a really bad high and it sent me into intense depersonalization which triggered a lot of bad feelings. Throughout the next few months while I was in this episode I came to the realization that I hate the way I’m living. I finally started accepting transitioning wasn’t for me and it was terrifying. I had breakdowns over it and I knew that it was time to change things. I denied it for so long because I was scared of being wrong and realizing I fucked up my life. I didn’t fuck up my life though, it was just really scary at the time. It took a few months to finally realize I’m going to be okay if I detransition and I’m not too far gone into my transition to live normally as a girl again. Although I wish I could’ve been born male, I wasn’t and I started missing myself from before and it’s okay that I’m a woman in this lifetime. Although I wish I was male I can’t deal with all of the things I’d have to go through living the rest of my life as a trans person and putting in all this effort to change myself to be “happy”. I realized I didn’t like changing my biology and was scared of the long term effects. I’m still working on forgiving myself for trying to make such a big change to myself but I was only a teenager and I still am. It was only a few years of being trans and one year of t and I know I’m gonna be okay eventually, and you guys will too 🫶
That’s exactly how I felt but I promise you that the people who truly love you and care for you will not be upset at all. You can express to them how you’ll always appreciate the support they gave you. If they supported you through your transition, they will support it the other way around. And if they don’t, they’re not a real friend