This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user expresses complex, nuanced, and personal experiences with detransition, body image, and dysphoria. The language is natural, with self-deprecating remarks ("I'm a lazy person") and inconsistencies that reflect genuine human thought. The passion and criticism align with the expected perspective of a desister/detransitioner.
About me
I never fit into the typical boxes for a female, and my discomfort grew intense during puberty when my body started changing. I found communities online that presented transition as the only answer, so I started identifying as a man and took testosterone. But it was exhausting trying to be seen as something I wasn't, and I eventually stopped because it never made me feel at home in my body. Now, I've accepted that there's no perfect cure for my dysphoria, and I'm learning to just be myself. I found peace by stepping away from online politics and finding friends who see me for who I am, not as an identity.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition was messy and complicated. I never really fit into the typical gender boxes. As a kid, I was always forced to dress and act a certain way because I was born female, but it never felt right. I was never a girly-girl. I think a lot of my discomfort started during puberty; I really hated developing breasts and all the changes that came with that. It felt like my body was betraying me.
I found a lot of my initial ideas about transition online. I spent a lot of time in certain communities that presented transition as the only solution for anyone who didn't fit in. I think I was also influenced by friends who were exploring similar identities. It felt like the right thing to do, the only way to finally feel comfortable. So, I started identifying as non-binary. It felt like a safer, less permanent first step than saying I was a man. But that didn't last long. I quickly moved on to identifying as a trans man and decided to start medical transition.
I took testosterone for a while. I also bound my chest every day because I hated my breasts so much. I thought all of this would finally make me feel at home in my body, but it didn't. Even on testosterone and binding, no one in my life ever actually saw me as or treated me as a man. They all still saw me as female. I was too lazy to put in the enormous effort it would have taken to try and "pass" completely—changing my voice, my mannerisms, everything. It felt like a performance I was doomed to fail at.
A big reason I detransitioned was simply that it was too much work for a result that never came. I was tired of trying to be something I wasn't and failing at it. I stopped taking testosterone. Over time, I've managed to obsess less over my dysphoria. I still feel it sometimes, but I've stopped believing there's a "cure." I'm just me. I don't need to be good at being a man or good at being a woman; being bad at being human is part of being human. Everyone has their struggles, mine was just dysphoria.
I don't regret exploring transition because I think I needed to go through it to understand myself better. But I do have some regrets about how quickly I moved and how much I listened to online influences instead of my own gut. My thoughts on gender now are that it's not nearly as important as everyone makes it out to be. You just need to find people who don't care about identity politics, people who see you for you and not as a political statement. I had to get out of my comfort zone and find new hobbies and communities to meet those kinds of "normies," and it was the best thing I ever did.
I also had to step back from social media because it was constantly shoving trans-related political content in my face, which wasn't helpful for my mental state. Leaving those spaces was crucial for me to find peace.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 13 | Started puberty; began feeling intense discomfort with my body, particularly hating breast development. |
| 19 | Began identifying as non-binary, influenced by online communities and friends. |
| 20 | Socially transitioned to identifying as a trans man. |
| 21 | Started taking testosterone. |
| 22 | Stopped testosterone. Detransitioned and stopped identifying as trans. |
Top Comments by /u/fly-me-to-the_moon:
Social media has been shit for quite a while. Notice how you said you can block some ads? But you can't block all of them without some add on. It's designed to shove stupid stuff in your face, except now it "advertises" political content as well. Taking a page out from newspapers and trying to shape your opinion on politics.
On reddit specifically, it'll constantly shove trans content and other political bait towards me, even on accounts completely unrelated to it. On Youtube, it almost never happens. Those are the only social media I use.
Obviously one solution is to leave social media entirely, which l'm very tempted to do for more reasons than this, but it is useful for somethings.
Do it. What actual net benefit is there to using social media? Most information can be found on other sites.The best you can get out of social media is a "community", which you can just get in real life for most hobbies. I only really use reddit if I can't find something off a search engine most of the time.
Honestly, you just need to surround yourself with non-politically charged people. You don't actually matter to either of those two groups: you are just a ball in a game of pong to them. You need to find people who don't care about identity politics, even if that means picking up new hobbies or just overall getting out of your comfort zone. There are a lot of "normies" that don't obsess over this stuff and don't care either way. I speak partially from personal experience.
You don't need makeup to be female. You don't even need makeup to be you.
No one is "good" at being human. Being bad at being human is part of being human. You're not different in that regard, most people just have other problems than dysphoria. I do still feel dysphoric, but I've managed to obsess less over it over time. I don't know if I can be "cured", and I stopped caring. I am just "me".
This is a bizarre question. I've basically been non gender conforming my entire life. The only main times I haven't were when I was made to be gender conforming as a child, or dressing up for a suit and tie occassion. But I don't think I ever "lived" as the opposite gender, because no one ever treated me like that. Even when I was on testosterone and binded, everyone treated me as female. Maybe if I had done a "better job" at it, I could have for a little while with some hypothetical friends, until they saw some documents, or talked to any of my family. But I'm a lazy person, and it was one of the main reasons for detransitioning.
I'm excluding online interactions here, but even then, sometimes if they knew I was "trans" they would treat me as female.
Well yes, I addressed that in the comment after this. But even then, there are feminine men, and they get treated as.... men. I've met a lot of feminine men, but they are not treated as women. More often they might be suspected of being gay than not. And no, technically they didn't have to live as a fashion artist or drag queen, because they have other jobs, and enough prestige to not worry about that.
To be honest, I think this only really applies to feminine men. I never really had any issue for my appearance in conservative areas. But maybe it really depends on how conservative the area is, I wouldn't know. (I assume you're talking about the US or some other western countries anyway.)