genderaffirming.ai 

Reddit user /u/forlesbianeyesonly's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 17 -> Detransitioned: 25
female
low self-esteem
hated breasts
took hormones
regrets transitioning
escapism
depression
influenced online
influenced by friends
got top surgery
serious health complications
body dysmorphia
puberty discomfort
started as non-binary
anxiety
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.

The comments show:

  • Consistent perspective: A sustained focus on the risks of transition and the social stigma of detransitioning.
  • Personal experience: References to specific, personal consequences (e.g., being doxxed) and use of empathetic, first-person language ("I've been," "I'm sorry").
  • Plausible narrative: The evolution from general arguments (2022) to offering specific medical warnings and personal support (2023-2024) fits a genuine user's deepening involvement.

The passion and anger present are consistent with a genuine detransitioner or desister's experience, as noted in the instructions.

About me

I was born female and my discomfort with puberty made me believe I was meant to be male. I found a community online that encouraged me to transition, and I took testosterone and had top surgery. I now see my feelings were caused by other issues, and I deeply regret the permanent changes I made to my body. I feel betrayed that no one asked the hard questions about my depression and anxiety. I'm now trying to find peace with the body I was born with.

My detransition story

My journey with transition and detransition was long and complicated, and looking back, I see how many things I misunderstood about myself. I was born female, but I never felt like I fit in with other girls, especially when I hit puberty. I hated the changes in my body, particularly developing breasts; it felt like a foreign invasion and caused me immense discomfort. I now believe this was a mix of body dysmorphia and the general awkwardness of being a teenager, but at the time, I was convinced it was a sign I was born in the wrong body.

My low self-esteem and depression made me vulnerable. I found a lot of community and answers online that pointed me toward transition. It felt like I finally had an explanation for why I felt so wrong. I started identifying as non-binary first, then as a trans man. It felt like an escape from all the pain and confusion. I was also influenced by friends who were exploring similar identities; it felt like we were all finding ourselves together, but it was also a bit of an echo chamber. We reinforced each other's beliefs without ever questioning them.

I ended up taking testosterone. I was on it for a few years. The changes were rapid and, at first, felt affirming. But the longer I was on it, the more I started to notice things that worried me. My body felt… medicalized. I learned that cross-sex hormone replacement therapy causes permanent changes to your body in places you don't intend, like your heart and your bone density. These changes are treatable but not reversible. It puts you on a path of medicalizing yourself for life, and that reality began to scare me.

I also got top surgery. I was so desperate to be rid of my breasts that I didn't fully consider the consequences. I want others to know that it will never be a perfectly flat, smooth chest like a Ken doll. You will always have remnants. It looks like scar tissue, bumps, and dips. It can feel like phantom pain or nerve damage. There can be serious complications with healing, infections, and even problems with how your body functions. It’s a major, irreversible amputation.

Questioning all of this was incredibly isolating. I faced a lot of backlash. I was doxxed and called a TERF in a public Discord server just for telling a classmate I was detransitioning and talking about the Tavistock clinic. It's terrifying to be called transphobic for just talking about your own life, but I've learned that worthwhile people will have the sense to hear you out and draw their own conclusions.

I now see that my initial feelings were influenced by a lot of things that had nothing to do with being trans. I think the online world can be like a kind of religion, where certain ideas are repeated like dogma. You're deemed a good member if you conform, and a sinner if you question anything. The more "sinners" you call out, the more secure your standing feels. I got caught up in that.

I don't speak for everyone, and some people may not regret their transition, but I do. I regret the permanent changes I made to my body. I feel a deep sense of betrayal that my community, my parents, and my medical team failed to protect me and ask the hard questions. They just affirmed everything without digging deeper into my depression, anxiety, and self-esteem issues. I’m left dealing with the permanent consequences of decisions I made when I was not in a good place.

My thoughts on gender now are that it's a lot more complicated than we're often told. For me, it wasn't an innate identity I was born with but a solution I latched onto to solve other problems. I'm trying to make peace with the female body I was born with and find a way to live in it without hating it.

Age Event
13 Started puberty; began to feel intense discomfort and hatred toward my developing breasts.
17 Began identifying as non-binary, influenced by online communities and friends.
19 Started identifying as a trans man and began testosterone hormone therapy.
22 Underwent top surgery (double mastectomy).
24 Began to question my transition due to health concerns and a shifting sense of self.
25 Stopped taking testosterone and began the process of detransitioning.

Top Comments by /u/forlesbianeyesonly:

5 comments • Posting since November 16, 2022
Reddit user forlesbianeyesonly (desisted female) explains how the rhetoric around gender transition mirrors religious dogma, where labeling others as "sinners" (i.e., transphobic) is used to secure one's own standing.
33 pointsNov 16, 2022
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Thank you for starting this discussion. You make an excellent point re: propaganda & misinformation. I think it’s criminal that this topic is deemed forbidden or taboo.

This argument/idea really mirrors a sort of religious type of repetition that comes w/ deeming whether some people as good church members and others as sinners. The more sinners you name, the more secure your standing within the church.

Reddit user forlesbianeyesonly (desisted female) comments on a vulnerable post, empathizing with the betrayal and isolation felt by an FTM individual who was failed by their community, parents, and medical team.
24 pointsJul 31, 2024
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Dude I’m sorry about some of the comments on here. This is a rlly vulnerable thing to share and a common experience for FTMs. It’s so understandable to feel the way you’re feeling when your community, parents and medical team failed to protect you. It’s a betrayal. I can’t imagine how isolating this experience has been. Thank you for sharing

Reddit user forlesbianeyesonly (desisted female) explains the potential physical consequences of nullification surgery, including scar tissue, phantom pain, nerve damage, and urinary complications.
19 pointsMar 31, 2023
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You are not a ken doll. It will never be a flat crotch in the sense that you will always have remnants of your genitalia. This will look like scar tissue. Like bumps or dips. It will feel like phantom pain, like nerve damage. You may even have complications with peeing, like fistulas and infections.

Reddit user forlesbianeyesonly (desisted female) explains being doxxed and called a TERF for discussing detransition and the Tavistock clinic with a classmate.
15 pointsMay 21, 2023
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I’ve been doxxed & called a TERF in a public discord for telling a trans classmate I’m detrans/talking about the Tavistock clinic. Luckily this classmate didn’t have the social capital to organize a smear campaign against me. I could afford to be more careful in professional environments. Yes, being called transphobic is scary, but worthwhile people will always have the sense to hear you out and draw their own conclusions.

Reddit user forlesbianeyesonly (desisted female) explains why HRT's permanent effects on the heart and bone density conflict with the goal of enlisting.
8 pointsAug 2, 2023
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Cross-sex Hormone replacement therapy causes permanent changes to your body in places where you are not intending it to. For example, your heart and your bone density. These changes are treatable but not irreversible. You are on a pathway towards medicalizing yourself for life, which is in conflict with your goal of enlisting due to the demands of physical fitness.