This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account "foxgirl1318" appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic detransitioner/desister.
The comments display:
- Personal, detailed experiences with medical transition (T), detransition, and relationships.
- Consistent, passionate opinions that align with common detransitioner perspectives, including trauma-based causes for gender dysphoria and criticism of medical transition.
- Emotional nuance and varied language, including casual asides ("lol"), which is atypical for bots.
The views are strong but consistent with a genuine, passionate user from the /r/detrans community.
About me
I started taking testosterone at 19 because I was deeply unhappy and thought becoming a man would solve all my problems. The hormones didn't help and actually made me feel worse, making me obsessed with how others saw me. I realized my dysphoria was really a symptom of my deep self-hatred and trauma, not an innate identity. With the support of my boyfriend, I stopped testosterone at 21 and went back to living as a woman. I'm finally free from that pressure and just living my life, secure in who I am.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition started because I was deeply unhappy and hated myself. I was depressed and looking for a way to escape my life and my body. I thought that if I became someone else—a man—all my problems would be solved. I was even told by a gender therapist that I had to go on testosterone or I’d have to take antidepressants, which felt like a huge push.
I started taking testosterone, and it didn't fix anything. It actually made me feel worse. I became totally obsessed with "passing" and whether people saw me as a real man. I lost my ability to orgasm for a while, which was really scary. Luckily, that came back for me after I stopped taking T, but I know that's not the case for everyone and I feel for those who have lasting problems.
A big part of my experience was realizing that my feelings were tied to other issues. I think what gets called "gender dysphoria" is often just a result of deep self-hatred and childhood trauma. For a lot of guys, it's also mixed up with a fetish, which I saw a lot of in the community. I came to believe it's a way to escape from yourself and your pain, to try and become a completely different person.
I started to detransition after I began dating my current boyfriend. He was the one who helped me see that I didn't have to keep doing this if it wasn't making me happy. It sounds simple, but when everyone in your life is encouraging you and making it seem like going back is a betrayal, it's really hard to admit you were wrong. He told me I didn't owe anyone an explanation for my choices, and that was incredibly freeing.
I made a simple social media post saying I was going back to living as a girl, and I decided I wouldn't answer any questions about it. To my surprise, nobody really cared or asked for details; they were just like, "ok, cool." I had built it up in my head to be this huge, dramatic thing, but it wasn't.
I don't believe gender dysphoria is a real, innate thing. I think it's a symptom of other problems, like trauma or low self-esteem. I have zero interest in being with someone who has dysphoria now because I see it as a sign of instability, and I've had enough of that in my life. I need a partner who is secure in who they are.
I do have some regrets about transitioning, mostly about the time and energy I spent on something that didn't fix the underlying issues. But I don't regret detransitioning at all. It was the right choice for me, and I'm finally just living my life without all that pressure.
Age | Event |
---|---|
19 | Started taking testosterone. |
21 | Stopped testosterone. |
21 | Socially detransitioned and went back to living as a woman. |
Top Comments by /u/foxgirl1318:
Proud of you! Seems like "gender dysphoria" can be set off so easily by hating your body and being fueled by porn. Really think it's just always the result of desperately wanting to be anything other than yourself. And a fetish on top of that for a verrry large amount of detrans dudes lol. At least you aren't afraid to admit it!
Hot pink is a wonderful color. More guys should be less afraid to wear it!!
First, I don't think gender dysphoria is real. I don't think it's even rare, I think it doesn't exist at all in the form we see it as. I think "dysphoria" is caused by childhood trauma and self-hatred, and fueled by a fetish for some people. So just gonna get that out of the way.
I transitioned because I was super unhappy with myself and my life. I thought transitioning would fix it and cure my depression (was even told "go on testosterone or you'll have to take anti depressants" by my gender therapist) and it did nothing. It actually made me dislike myself more and made me absolutely obsessed with "passing". But I was so convinced it was just "internalized transphobia" that made me not happy so I was encouraged to just continue.
I detransitioned when it all kind of hit me when I started dating my current bf. He helped me realize that I didn't have to do it if I didn't want to, which may sound crazy, but it's real hard to admit you're wrong and extra hard when everybody around you won't stop encouraging you and painting cis people as the enemy.
I was the same way. I was terrified about needing to explain everything, until my bf told me I just simply didn't owe anybody an explanation if I didn't want to.
So I didn't. I just did my thing, made a social media post saying I was going back to being a girl again, and just planned to not entertain any questions. I actually never got any and nobody ever cared, they were just like "ok, cool"
I think it's easy to assume the worst, but the worst doesn't always happen. Just don't let other people dictate how you are living your life, do whatever you need to do to chase happiness at all costs.
Sorry you are dealing with this. I lost my ability to orgasm on T and luckily it came back for me after I stopped taking it. I can't imagine how much it sucks to be 2 years off and still have problems.
Doctors really need to start providing more support for detrans people.
To me it's extremely unfair, because there are so many cases of men "knowing" for years but only transitioning later in life, causing massive issues for their wives that are then essentially trapped with them because of financials. Because it can be so relationship-altering, this is NOT something to hide for either sex.
I would be very angry if my partner hid this from me, because I have zero interest in dating someone with dysphoria. That's a hard dealbreaker for me; not only is it hiding something very significant, but I also view it as a time bomb just waiting to go off. I would always be worried about it and im not going to accept spending my life worrying if I'll have to leave the person I love and deal with immense pain that causes 10 years down the line after thinking I'd spend the rest of my life with them. It's so, so selfish to hide it.
Openness is extremely important to me in relationships. I hide nothing, and want the same from someone I'm with. No secrets on my end, none on theirs.
On that note.... I would be totally fine with someone who questioned themselves and later decided they were not trans as long as NO dysphoria at all remained present (however my brain is dumb and still worries a bit on that one.... not neaaarrlyyy to the same extent though lol). That's very different than just straight up hiding something, and it's nice to have a shared experience like that to be able to discuss with someone who understands.
Side note, dysphoria absolutely has causes. Something worth looking in to potentially if you want to attempt to put it behind you.
I'm going to say this right now, you may not be as feminine as you think. Your crossdressing became a response to take away the pain of abuse, probably as an "escape" from it. It's like forming a new sense of self.
It's actually extremely common for men who crossdress to be set off by trauma. I think if you speak with a therapist and work to process the abuse you went through, you'll find these feelings will go away entirely. There is plenty of hope for you.
Exactly this. I have had enough instability in my life, I would want to know if it would be present again if I continued on with dating someone so I could end things before they got serious and I got too attached. It's very not fair, and is just selfish imo to hide.
Agreeing with this. It's the most unappealing fetish out there and I have ended relationships over this one, it kills my attraction and respect towards a guy instantly. I don't even like it when dudes watch this type of porn because it's a mental illness, I'd prefer they watch literally anything else lol.
The only times I ever see women with "sissies" or crossdressers is when they are trapped when they find out the dude is doing it secretly behind their back or years in to marriage when he admits it. Always just awful lol.
You are correct in what an MRI would pick up. The connections in the brain are highly variable and change on environmental factors as simple as stress, so the only way this could ever be accurate is if scans were done way before someone ID'd as "trans", which would be tricky to do.
An MRI study is absolute bs in this scenario if done incorrectly.