This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user demonstrates:
- Personal, specific medical knowledge about HRT, surgeries, and treatments (e.g., Vagifem, binding effects, hysterectomy procedures).
- Consistent, nuanced perspectives that align with a desisted/detransitioned individual, offering both personal experience and supportive advice to others.
- Emotional complexity, including passion and frustration, which is consistent with the stated context of the community. The tone is engaged and personal, not robotic or scripted.
The account shows no indicators of automated behavior or a fabricated persona.
About me
I started as a teenager, deeply uncomfortable with my developing female body and struggling with depression. I found online communities that convinced me I was a man, so I took testosterone and had surgeries to remove my reproductive organs, believing it would fix everything. It didn't solve my problems, and I realized my desire to transition was an escape from my untreated mental health issues. I stopped testosterone and now see that I needed therapy, not hormones, to learn self-acceptance. I'm now healing and learning to be okay as a woman, understanding that my body is normal and mine.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I was deeply uncomfortable with my body, especially when I went through puberty and developed breasts. I hated them and felt like they didn't belong on me. Looking back, I think a lot of my feelings were tied to a general discomfort with puberty itself and a lot of low self-esteem. I was also struggling with depression and anxiety, and I found a lot of escape online.
I found communities online that told me these feelings meant I was transgender. I became convinced that I was a man and that medically transitioning was the only way to fix my unhappiness. I started taking testosterone. I was so sure it was the right path that I even encouraged others online, telling them they weren't trans if they had doubts, which I now see was wrong. I wasn't honest with myself or my doctors about my deeper mental health struggles. I later had a full hysterectomy and oophorectomy, removing my ovaries and uterus. I told myself, “I don't have any use for my ovaries so they're leaving too!” I believed it would solve everything.
It didn't. While on testosterone, I experienced vaginal atrophy, which made penetration uncomfortable. I learned later that there are treatments for that, like topical estrogen tablets, but at the time it just felt like another problem. After my surgeries, I started to realize that my problems weren't solved. I began to understand that my desire to transition was influenced by my untreated mental health issues and a need to escape from myself, not by a true transgender identity. I had focused on changing my body instead of dealing with my trauma and other underlying problems.
I stopped taking testosterone. I learned that you don't need to taper off it; your body's natural estrogen production just takes over again if you still have ovaries. I don't regret my detransition. I regret transitioning in the first place. I wish someone had asked me about my trauma or my mental health before I was given hormones and surgery. I needed therapy, not testosterone. I needed to learn to accept myself as a female, not try to become a man.
Now, I see that my body is just a body. Breasts come in all shapes and sizes, and so do clitorises and voices. Body hair can be managed. These things don't define your gender. I'm learning to be okay with being a woman who is just a little different because of the path I went down. My body is normal, and it's mine. I'm not ruined. The damage felt irreversible, but I'm working on healing.
I don't think I ruined myself, but the journey caused me a lot of pain that could have been avoided. I benefited from finally getting the right kind of therapy that wasn't just about affirming a transgender identity but about understanding why I wanted to escape my own life and body in the first place.
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| 14 | ~2010 | Started hating my breasts and feeling intense discomfort with female puberty. |
| 17 | ~2013 | Began identifying as transgender and started taking testosterone. |
| 23 | 2019 | Underwent a full hysterectomy and oophorectomy (removal of uterus and ovaries). |
| 24 | 2019 | Stopped testosterone and began the process of detransitioning. |
Top Comments by /u/fthrowm:
Would I be happy if I was still living my life as a woman?
If you're really worried, then you can try it out again.
My vagina is atrophying, I can’t be penetrated anymore because it’s just too uncomfortable.
For the record, there's medication for this. They're little tablets that you can just push up there and don't affect your hormone levels. It's called vagifem. Make an appointment with a gyno to talk about it. It really works! Lube can also be super helpful. Lots of people of all genders use lube.
I hate having to preface every romantic interaction with “You know I’m trans, right?” It’s a nightmare.
It might make it easier to just declare on your tinder bio that you're trans. The reason I say might is that some people ignore bios. I've gotten rejected a few times for being MENA so I try to make sure people know that beforehand because it's awkward when people think I'm Hispanic instead. But I still end up with some people who assume I'm Hispanic
I wish more than anything that I would have received therapy, that someone would have considered my trauma before prescribing me life-changing drugs.
You can still go to therapy right now. For everything you listed. You can work through all that in addition to your feelings about gender.
I’d lose my friends, my job, my family, the damage has been done and it feels irreversible.
Why would you lose all that? For doing what?
But to answer your question
have I ruined myself
No
No. As a trans person, this is not being transgender. It sounds like generic obsessiveness. You need to talk to your psych or therapist about this. And don't lie. A lot of people end up lying to fit what doctors what to hear of textbook definition trans. If you do that then of course they'll think you're trans. You should show them this post.
I literally had a dream like 3 hours ago of me being a girl, and I woke up in pure disgust then my mind said "you are faking your disgust".
yeah you're not trans. You can't really tell whether or not someone is trans in 99 percent of cases online, but you're definitely not trans
This isn't dysphoria.
It's good that you found out what you need to be comfortable!
For the record, you don't have to take another T shot ever again. If you stop then then your estrogen levels will slowly return to normal. Unless you've had a hysterectomy, there's no need to "taper off" or anything.
I'm a conversion therapy victim but I find it weird that you're asking about such personal information without any indication about what you're planning to do with this information or how the information will be protected. FYI, most victims of conversion therapy are still sexual or gender minorities because it works less than five percent of the time.
Your breast tissue is most likely not damaged unless you were binding while still developing. At most it's saggier than before, which would be normal even if you didn't bind. Women and men have all kinds of breasts and they are all normal for the most part. A lot of women feel bad about their breasts.
Voices can increase in pitch sometimes, and even if not, plenty of women have deeper voices.
Body hair can be removed through electrolysis and/or laser. Many women who never took testosterone think they have too much body hair and do treatments like that as well. Even if you don't want to do that, it's normal for women to have body hair.
Clitorises come in all different sizes for women who never took testosterone. I promise that it's not weird. I mean, r/bigclit (nsfw)
We can all have regrets but what's most important is handling things now in a way that you don't have regrets.
Your body is perfectly normal and average unless you were on T for a decade or something haha
I don't have any use for my ovaries so they're leaving too!
And it seems to only be the case when estrogen levels are average or high and endometrium is thickening. If a trans man takes testosterone or when a cis woman takes birth control then then the endometrium lining stays thin.
I'm not sure if being off of testosterone meant my estrogen levels were normal again but I had to get an ultrasound before scheduling the hysto+oopho so I know there's nothing wrong right now.