This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. The red flags for a bot or troll are not present.
The user's writing is emotionally nuanced, self-reflective, and shows a consistent, complex personal narrative centered on surgical regret, body image, and the ongoing struggle with identity after detransitioning. The interactions are conversational and build on previous replies, which is atypical for inauthentic accounts. The passion and conflict expressed align with the expected genuine experiences of someone in this situation.
About me
I started transitioning to male as a teenager and had top surgery at 18, but I've since detransitioned back to living as female. The most difficult part is accepting my flat chest as a woman, though I'm determined to learn to love my body as it is now. I'm overwhelmed and just want life to be simpler, so I'm considering a non-binary label for my own peace of mind while I figure things out. I don't regret transitioning because it helped me survive at the time, but I do struggle with the permanent changes. Now at 20, I'm focused on moving forward with acceptance and getting the information I need for my own path.
My detransition story
My journey with gender has been long and confusing, and I'm still figuring a lot of it out. I started transitioning when I was a teenager, and I've now detransitioned back to living as female, which is my birth sex. Even though I've detransitioned, I still feel very conflicted about gender. I don't feel like I fit neatly into the category of "woman," but I also know that identifying as trans wasn't right for me. It's a strange in-between place to be.
A huge part of my journey involved having top surgery. I had my breasts removed when I was identifying as male. Now that I'm living as female again, I have to deal with the reality of having a flat chest. It's hard. I'm nervous that I'll never be able to love my body as something that is very in-between—a female but with a fully flat chest. With clothes on, I actually like how my chest looks. The struggle is more about the social perception of being a woman with a flat chest now that I've realized being trans was wrong for me. I am determined to accept my choices and my body. I'm determined to love myself now or die trying. I think about surgery regret a lot, but the more I think about it, the more okay I become with it. I know that options like implants or fat grafts exist in the future if I want them, which is comforting.
I took testosterone for a while, and I've learned a lot about the physical effects. I know that hormones change genitals in more ways than just clitoral growth; the whole area can change and move around. I think it's important for people to know that it can take a long time, up to a year or more after stopping hormones, to see how things will settle.
A big theme for me right now is the desire for things to be easier. I'm 20 years old and I feel very overwhelmed by everything. I just want life to be simpler. This is why I'm thinking about labels again. Even though I've retransitioned to my birth sex, I don't feel entirely comfortable just calling myself a woman. The idea of using a non-binary label for now is appealing because it feels like it might take a weight off my shoulders. It would be a label to help me navigate the world while I figure myself out. I wouldn't go around telling everyone, but for my own peace of mind, it might help. I'm tired of the constant battle with pronouns. No one ever got them right, even before I transitioned. When I was living as female, I got called a man or even yelled at for being a trans woman. Now, I just want to let pronouns fall where they may. I'm too tired to correct people anymore.
I've always struggled with feeling like people are weirded out by me. I find that people don't warm to me easily, and it makes me sad. I'm always guessing what other people are thinking, and I assume it's because they find me strange. This social anxiety has been a constant throughout my life, before, during, and after transition.
I don't have any regrets about my transition in the sense that I believe I was doing what I needed to survive at the time. But I do have regrets about the permanent changes, like the surgery. I'm trying to move forward with acceptance. There's no one right way to detransition, and for some of us, that includes making decisions about our bodies to feel okay again. I'm committed to getting the full information I need to make informed choices for my own path forward.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Early Teens | Started socially transitioning to male. |
| 17 | Started taking testosterone. |
| 18 | Had top surgery (double mastectomy). |
| 19 | Stopped testosterone and began detransitioning. |
| 20 | Currently living as female again, but exploring a non-binary identity for personal clarity. |
Top Comments by /u/hdhfbf2777b:
No ones encouraging me ive already decided what I want to do, some of us feel the need to get surgery to feel okay with their bodies again, and that’s okay, there’s no one way to detransition. The only thing with not allowing replies would be stopping me getting the full information I need to make an informed decision - either way I’m going ahead with it
Yes I’m very new and asking as many questions as I can. Thanks for your response. That makes sense - more so using it as a label to navigate the world, or even because I still don’t fully understand myself. I’m 20 and I would like a label, it seems to make things easier.
I love the idea of letting the pronouns fall where they may - I’m honestly so tired of correcting people either way, no one ever got it right even before transition, when I was female (I got called a man or even yelled at for being a trans woman), I just want to let it be how it is. Anyway thank you for your response I’m so happy you have learnt to accept yourself, that’s amazing ❤️ I feel like I’m finally on a path now that will allow me to one day feel that way too. Also I wanted to say you’ve replied to a couple of my posts and I’m super grateful for that ! Sorry if I don’t always respond - I’m very overwhelmed by everything at the moment, but endlessly grateful for your time and energy ! ❤️
Thank you for ur response ! Yeah I feel like it just makes it easier - and that’s honestly all I want now, I just want things to be easier. I feel very conflicted on gender still even with retransitioning to my birth sex, you know ? And while I won’t go around telling everyone I’m non binary it feels like it might just take a weight of my shoulders to be able to say well I’m non binary at least for the time being while I figure myself out. I don’t know if that makes sense. Anyway thanks again for taking the time to respond
Thank you I really appreciate your response ❤️ I’m super happy you’re feeling comfortable ! I’ve already had top surgery so I’m nervous I’ll never be able to love my body as something that is very inbetween - a female but with a fully flat chest… do you think through the self love you went through you could accomplish that, or was it more of a process to appreciate your natural body? Anyway thank you again for your response x
Yeah, it’s a big one I’m having surgery regret, but if you need to talk about that I’m here. The more I think about it the more okay I become with it, as I know I can get implants or fat grafts, and for now I really do like how my chest with clothes, (it’s just more social perception of a woman with a flat chest now that I’ve realized being trans is wrong for me)! I’m also determined to accept my choices - and my body. I’m determined to love myself now or die trying. Anyway, yeah I hope you are okay and if you need to talk it through let me know !
Hormones change your genitals in more ways than clit growth - your genitals could just be moving around ! I don’t know how long you’ve been off of testosterone but wait a bit (up to a year or more!) to fully see how your genitals will look. Also everyone looks different so no stress if it ends up staying like that! :)
Yeah I get what you are saying - it’s confusing and hard! I find I don’t really bother anyone but I also don’t feel like people warm to me very easily because they are weirded out by me and it makes me sad:( though that’s me guessing what other people are thinking