This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the comments provided, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic actor.
The user's comments are nuanced, emotionally complex, and highly personal, reflecting a genuine internal struggle with identity, transition, and detransition. They reference specific, lived experiences (e.g., stopping HRT abruptly, social dynamics with gay men, considerations of medication like tamoxifene) that are consistent with a real person's journey. Their language is self-reflective, contradictory at times, and engages deeply with the arguments, which is not typical of a simple agenda-pushing bot. The passion and occasional frustration align with the expected demeanor of someone who has experienced harm.
About me
I was born male and transitioned because I thought being a woman was a better way to fit in and date men. I stopped my hormones because I realized I was more comfortable just being myself as a gender non-conforming person. I'm now dealing with the physical changes from HRT and considering my options to reduce my breast growth. Looking back, I see my transition was an attempt to escape being a man I thought was low value. I'm now slowly figuring out what kind of life will actually make me happy.
My detransition story
My journey with transition and detransition is complicated, and I don't think I can ever point to just one reason for any of it. It’s a lot of things all mixed together.
I was born male and I transitioned to live as a woman. I never fully bought into the idea that I had a female gender identity trapped inside; for me, it was more about wanting to fit into a role I thought was better for me. I saw it as a way to maximize my physical and social potential. I was mostly attracted to men, and I think a lot of my desire to transition was wrapped up in that. Being around gay men felt communal and happy, but the idea of dating men as a trans woman felt isolating. I started to lose faith that a man could ever truly be with me, and that the men who were interested were often a source of trouble, pulling me away from a safer social circle.
As I got older, I became a lot more comfortable with the idea of just being gender non-conforming (GNC). It felt like a contradiction sometimes, but it also felt more true. I stopped my hormone replacement therapy (HRT) abruptly one day; I didn't taper off. I still present in a feminine way and haven't cut my hair, but I'm holding onto that for myself, not for an identity.
I’ve thought a lot about my physical changes from HRT. I’ve considered trying medications like tamoxifene or raloxifene to reduce my breast tissue, even though I’ve heard they might not work on hormone-induced growth. I want to try every option before I even think about another surgery.
Looking back, I think a huge part of my transition was an attempt to escape. I believe that in a society that devalues women, making them seem weak or annoying, it’s not surprising that some people born female would want to become men. It can feel like an easy way out of that oppression. And for people born male, like me, transitioning can feel like a way to escape being a "low value" man. It’s about elevating your status. For some people, it genuinely works. I can imagine a trans woman who is financially secure, considered attractive, and surrounded by supportive people who is perfectly content. Or a trans man with a great surgery result and a frozen egg supply who is doing well. Their success doesn’t make my experience any less real.
My own unhappiness with my decisions definitely colors how I see things now. I think my judgment of the trans community is clouded because it didn’t work out for me. Maybe I didn’t pass well enough, or maybe transition just didn’t bring me closer to my authentic self. Maybe I wasn't prepared for the transphobia. What works for others didn't work for me.
I don’t have huge regrets, but I see it all more clearly now. The pros just started to be outweighed by the cons. I’m trying to figure out what kind of life will actually make me happy, and that means listening to myself and considering the opinions of people who truly care about me. It's a slow process.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 25 | Started taking hormones (HRT) to transition from male to female. |
| 30 | Stopped HRT abruptly, without tapering off. Began the process of detransition. |
Top Comments by /u/honeygoji:
interesting. im curious as to why leaders of the trans movement would want to target women specifically? is there like, an incentive to "create" more FTMs? what would that incentive be?
and honestly, to me, it's not surprising that a society that devalues women constantly, makes them appear weak, annoying, bitchy, crazy, etc would produce lots of FTMs. who would want to be a woman, esp an ugly woman, in a patriarchal society? to me this seems like an issue with patriarchy.
the trans movement just provides an "easy" way out of this - just become a man yourself! and for some, this works. you don't get the same amount of abuse, you are respected more, etc. but for MOST trans men i would assume this is not the case. very few people would respect a short, feminine man with wide hips and a scarred chest, the same way they'd respect a cis man.
its not even that its personal, i just think its complex and i wont be doing myself justice by naming any one reason.
but the cons just started outweighing the pros lol. i'm mostly attracted to men, and i stopped having faith that any man could ever truly be with a trans woman. im also around gay men a lot and they seem much happier? it feels more communal whereas dating trans attracted men seems like you're asking for trouble/stepping outside of your social network. i also think as i get older, i'm more comfortable with the idea of being GNC, which i know contradicts the OP but 😂 it's complicated
i think i always secretly knew that i was transitioning to fit a role better, to maximize what i thought was my physical potential.. i mean thats what transitioning is lol. i never truly bought into gender ideology, i just did and continue to do what i think is best for me
i get where you're coming from and i agree with a lot of the points you made - esp the first point because i do definitely think that transsexualism specifically as it exists today is a result of white supremacist capitalist patriarchy.
but, i do wonder if most of us have this sort of emotional reaction to the trans movement because we are unhappy with our decisions, for whatever reason. whether it's because you didn't pass or maybe transition just didnt bring you closer to your authentic self or maybe transphobia was too much and you werent prepared for it. whatever it was, we are here because it didn't work out for us and i think that might cloud our judgement of trans people and the community as a whole.
what works for others may not work for you, right? like if you understand why people transition - that both low value men and women might want to transition to escape their status - then i'm sure you can understand why they wouldn't share your feelings about what's happening, if they actually succeeded in what they sought out to do.
like i'm sure there is a trans woman somewhere who is perfectly content with her life now, she can financially support her transition, she has elevated her status and is hot now, and is surrounded by people who will indulge, what some might call, her "delusion". and same for trans men - there is definitely a trans man somewhere who has frozen his eggs, has a great top surgery result, and is doing well.
idk how much of transgenderism is coercion and a result of external influence but again i do agree with your first point. i guess that's the issue we're all trying to figure out right now is how much of these cases can be used to actually hold someone (a doctor, a professional etc) responsible - and how much of these cases are just situations where someone has made a personal mistake about themselves :/
Why does being "hot" have to be the only thing that affirms if someone's transition was successful for them?
this isn't what i meant at all - i was just giving hypotheticals of people who might be happy with their transition and for some, being attractive is a part of that!
i don't think that makes it a kink, though. transition for most people is about elevating your potential, like OP kinda mentions in their second point. idk tho.
ur so young!
i would say take this time to really sit with yourself, journal a lot (esp after socializing), and think about what kind of life would make you happy. this was really hard for me because there's just so much to consider. so many different angles to go about it.
where/with who are you most comfortable? maybe the life u want isnt about being comfortable? what do u even like to do and how are u going to sustain yourself? can u sustain and withstand a transition long-term?
listen to you. and consider the opinions of those that truly care about u. this could just be a phase, or it could be the next step in ur transition, which is lifelong.
why are you here 😭
im so confused about this sub's members because how are you in any way connected to trans / detrans ppl if you dont know what these buzzwords mean...
anyway, for the serious people in this thread: just wanna explain that i added "white supremacist" to OP's first point hoping that i wouldnt have to explain. but the way some people are racialized can affect their gender identity, the same way misogyny or materialism can.
oh wow ok. thank you!
i think im in a similar place as you, except i haven't cut my hair (yet) and i still hold onto presenting fem. i also didn't taper off HRT - i just stopped it one day 😭
re: breast tissue - do you think you'd give tamoxifene/raloxifene a try? i know they say it doesnt work on breast tissue (the kind you get from HRT), but idk i want to exhaust my options before i look into surgery.
im not saying OP isnt lying, but what would be the point in writing this long ass post? i also got the sense that this was fabricated to push an agenda but i'm also confused as to what that agenda might be.
like OP - what do you want? do you want to restrict access to child puberty blockers? as the person above me already said, child assessments are already required. maybe you should focus on suing your doctor or something?
i relate to a lot of this (except maybe the part about finding some trans ppl cringe, i try to fight that feeling).
i also totally get how it might be hard to let go of transition when you pass (that's my case, too). especially when you start detransitioning and you start being misidentified as a baby trans person, egg, or worse a crossdresser ><
i dont think you have to worry about the job tho, and detransition can be slow and subtle!