This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. The user demonstrates a consistent, deeply personal narrative of medical transition, detransition, and the accompanying emotional turmoil. The passion, anger, and specific details about their experience (e.g., hormone types, timelines, personal regrets, and physical changes like specific fillers) are not typical of a bot and align with the genuine, often raw, discourse found in detransition communities. The occasional grammatical errors also support the claim that English is not their first language, adding to the authenticity. There are no serious red flags suggesting this is an inauthentic account, a bot, or someone who isn't a desister/detransitioner.
About me
I started taking hormones because I hated myself and thought becoming a woman was the answer, but it just made me feel like a clown wasting time and money. The initial excitement faded, and I realized I was just a man on estrogen, living as a permanent mental patient dependent on drugs. I stopped the hormones five months ago, and the mental fog lifted, though my body is permanently changed from surgery and fillers. I now see the whole thing as an inauthentic lie and deeply regret the damage I did. I’m mentally a man again and just want to live in reality, focusing on my life and freedom.
My detransition story
Looking back now, it feels like I woke up from a very long, confusing dream. I can't believe I ever thought taking hormones was the answer. I spent about three and a half years on estrogen and testosterone blockers, and for what? To end up feeling like a clown who wasted so much money and time. I hated myself so much that I couldn't just accept reality. How did I ever believe I could become the opposite sex? It’s a madness I fell into, but I am determined to get out of it.
When I first started transitioning, there was a nice feeling, like an adrenaline rush. It was exciting, like a dream was coming true. But that feeling doesn't last. You eventually see that living as a trans person is not a happy life. It’s a life of being a mental patient, dependent on synthetic drugs every day, dealing with doctors and insurance. For someone like me who started later in life, you just end up looking like a man on estrogen. You can’t actually be a woman. I miss the “boy” I was before all of this so much. I look at my old photos and I feel a real sense of loss for the person I was.
I stopped the hormones about five months ago. It was like a fog lifted from my brain. My testosterone levels are back, actually very high now, but I’ve read that’s normal after stopping. I hope I can build my muscles back. My body hasn’t changed back much though, which is stressful. I had a nose job and lip fillers with a permanent filler called Aquamid, which is a sort of silicone. I still present in a feminine way because I’m in a relationship with a man, and I haven't cut my hair. But mentally, I am back to being a man. I just want to be free from hormones and this crazy idea that you can change your gender.
One of the worst parts of my time living as a trans woman was that I ended up feeling like a sexual object. It was annoying and, after a while, it made me really depressed. The whole thing is a lie. There’s nothing authentic about silicone breasts, a fake voice, a nose job, and synthetic hormones. I didn’t become a woman; I just looked like one. I think the trans community can be very selfish. If you don’t agree with them, you’re the enemy. They want everyone to be a lifelong patient. It’s a sick agenda.
I don’t regret transitioning in the sense that I had to go through it to learn this lesson, but I deeply regret the damage I did to my body and the time I lost. Life is so much more than gender. It’s about family, a career, travel, a partner, freedom. We need to live in reality, not in a delusion. I believe that in a few years, we will see many more people detransitioning when they realize this same truth.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| My Age | Event |
|---|---|
| (Age not specified, but young adult) | Started social and medical transition. Began taking estrogen and testosterone blockers. |
| (Age not specified) | Underwent facial feminization surgery (nose job) and got lip fillers. Lived as a trans woman for approximately 3.5 years. |
| (Age not specified) | Stopped taking hormones after 3.5 years. |
| 5 months after stopping HRT | Currently detransitioning. Testosterone levels are high again, mental fog is gone, but body changes are largely permanent. |
Top Comments by /u/hvghbcfggjmkkk:
Thank you for kindness. Yes it is permanent filler but ok, my T levels are back , actually very high but have read about it , it is normal more or less after stopping hrt. I hope I can build my muscles back. And get away from all this madness. Trans madness! Yes, I suppose my partner will my accept my “boy mode “ but I jus wanna be free of hrt and this crazy idea that one can change gender! It is hard. Very hard. But than again like wake up from a dream. And I want to live my life in reality not delusional.
Well thank you I guess. I think I am a proof of “ be careful of what you wish “. I have ended up like sexual object. Wich is actually very very annoying and after time makes me depressed. And I thyit is wrong term “ woman “ I am boy on estrogen. I can’t be a woman. I am a trans fem. That is very different from a woman.
Yes I agree with you. On the first picture is me pre medical transition. Second picture is me aster 3.5 years or estrogen and T blocs. Now I am 5 mount of( second picture) I still present fem, didn’t cut my hair because I stay in relationship with a man . But I miss “boy” myself from first photo sooo much. Mentally I am back , testosterone is main hormone in my body , kad only nose job, and lips fillers . But I mis my body.
Most of this “ questioning my gender “ people are young people who would like to transition . That is ok . But when I write my experience it is not valid. But trans fem from tik tok, that in most cases works like prostitute , full of make up is valid. Than ok. I did transition. I did pass. I did figure out that for me it was not “real me” . There is nothing authentic about silicone breast, fake voice, nose job and synthetic hormones. I didn’t become woman. I looked like one. After that I have realized this is all a lie. You don’t change your sex. If I write this, it is a problem in me. This is ok. But let them do their experience. Like trans people who call everyone who doesn’t share their experience “ transfobic “. No one is transfobic. People just don’t like you. That is it. And for “questioning your gender “ people seams like mostly they made up their decision. But try to find a way not to transition. But when they hear reasons, they attack me that I am transfobic.
I can feel you. After getting of hormones it was like wake up from a dream. I don’t know what did I think? How did I get to idea to take hormones? How much did I hate myself that I could not accept reality? How could I think that I can be opposite sex?? How could I be a clown for so long time? Spend so much money, time? But I will not give up. I will get out from this madness. So will you. Do not give up.
Well , I think many people have this nice feeling when they ( us ) start to transition. I think it is just adrenaline, something new is happening, like dream will come true, you buy new dress and so on … later when you see that trans life is not something that you would wish to anyone ( like mental disorder , unhappy person that wants to change their body, synthetic drugs every day, doctors, insurance) and most probably you will live like visible trans . If you start late , high , arms, shoulders, feet … hmm . Was it worth it. Because you can’t be women. You can be man on estrogen. Is that what you want than go for it. If not , hmmm maybe some time people that love us can see better picture them ourselves.
Hahaha , bravo ! But it is sooooo important to say this at loud! Because it is completely sick and unhealthy, selfish selfish selfish community. If you are not “ with them “ you are enemy! If you have different taste, opinion: enemy! Every one is against them!!! And don’t know wich community even got so much support. Mental illness stays mental illness. Delusional in every way.
You need time. It is not happening over night. You are beautiful way you are. Better live in reality than in delusion. Life is much more than gender. Stop reading about it. Imagine there is no choice? Synthetic hormones do not exist. Than what? Would you kill your self? No . You would live your life best you can. You would not think about it? You think that people who have “ success in transition “ have good life because of transition? No life is family, career, travel , partner, dog, freedom. This is a lie. Lie that is very unhealthy. In some years we will see many people detransition. What is a nice point for of transition if you look ridiculous. Many trans people do.
You don’t need nothing. They give you all! Get in hormones, you idiot , come , come!! Stay our lifetime patient, our hocus pocus rabbit! It is madness! Madness what is going on! So you don’t need to have GD to be trans, but GD is mental disorder wich they treat so that they change your body! If you are a body builder you can’t use testosterone, but they give it to a woman with no problem, trans people transition for “themselves “ but still wanna other people see them like different gender, you can be woman wit penis, man with vagina, but still trans people change their body. It is a sick no sense agenda to have more life long patients and sterile mentality Sick people!
And second I really don’t understand why “detrans sub” would fit you better??? Maybe ocd, panick attack sub?? This is exactly what I am talking about. People who has nothing to do with transition, come here and make comments about transition and detransition.