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Reddit user /u/its-yanna's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 17 -> Detransitioned: 19
female
low self-esteem
internalised homophobia
hated breasts
regrets transitioning
depression
influenced online
puberty discomfort
started as non-binary
only transitioned socially
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic.

There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user's language is personal, emotionally nuanced, and shows a natural progression of thought as they engage in a conversation about their internal struggles. The expressions of self-doubt, specific personal inspirations (Vi from Arcane), and the use of casual language ("lol") are consistent with a genuine person.

About me

I started as a teenager who hated being a woman because I linked it with weakness and suffering. I thought becoming a man was the only escape, so I identified as one for a while. I later realized this was rooted in internalized misogyny and a negative view of womanhood. I never medically transitioned, which I'm now grateful for. I'm currently working on accepting my female body and building my own strength, separate from harmful stereotypes.

My detransition story

My whole journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I never felt like I fit in with what a girl was supposed to be. I hated being a woman. For a long time, I thought the only way to escape that feeling was to become a man. I believed that being a man was better—it meant being strong and free from the suffering I associated with being female. I thought I was weak and doomed just because I was born a woman.

I now realize that a lot of these feelings were actually internalized misogyny. I had a very simplistic view of it at first, but after doing some research and talking to people, I understood that my desire to be a man and my hatred for my female body were rooted in these deep-seated beliefs. I had connected being a woman with being weak, suffering, and having a body that hates you. I couldn't think of a single good thing about being a woman.

It was a lonely feeling because when I tried to talk to my friends or my mother about hating being a woman, it seemed like I was the only one who felt that way. It helped a lot to read stories from other women online who also found it difficult, because it made me feel less alone.

Figuring this out was a huge turning point for me. I started to challenge the idea that I had to follow society's stereotypes for women. I learned that I could be whoever I wanted to be, no matter what body I have. I even got inspired by strong female characters, like Vi from Arcane, and decided I wanted to get physically stronger myself. I'm still working on motivating myself to start exercising, but the desire to feel strong in my own body is new for me.

I don't regret exploring my gender because it led me to understand myself better, but I do regret not questioning these negative beliefs about womanhood sooner. My transition was mostly social and in my own head; I never took hormones or had surgery. I'm grateful for that now, because it gave me the space to work through these issues without permanent changes. I'm now focused on learning to accept my body and separate my sense of self from the harmful stereotypes I internalized.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

Age Event
Early Teens Started feeling intense discomfort with being a woman and puberty. Believed being a man was better.
Around 17-18 Began identifying as non-binary and then as a man online and with close friends as a way to escape my feelings about being female.
19 Did research and realized my feelings were linked to internalized misogyny. This was the start of my detransition.
19 (Present) Actively working on accepting my body as a woman and challenging negative stereotypes. Seeking inspiration from strong women and building a positive self-image.

Top Comments by /u/its-yanna:

5 comments • Posting since January 23, 2025
Reddit user its-yanna (desisted female) explains how she realized her desire to be a man was internalized misogyny and asks for tips on learning to accept her female body.
8 pointsJan 23, 2025
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I did some quick research and figured out why my desire to be a man and hate being a woman could be internalized misogyny. Thanks, apparently I had a simplistic view of what internalized misogyny could look like. Do you have any tips on how I could deal with this? It's hard to learn to accept my body when I can't think of a single good thing about being a woman

Reddit user its-yanna (desisted female) comments on learning to love being a girl, explaining her plan to get physically stronger with Vi from Arcane as her inspiration.
4 pointsJan 23, 2025
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Thanks for the advice ^^ I've been trying to keep in mind that women don't need to follow the stereotypes imposed by society and that I can be whoever I want no matter what body I have. I've been thinking about starting to exercise to get stronger physically (my inspiration is Vi from Arcane), but first I have to overcome my laziness lol

Reddit user its-yanna (desisted female) discusses her struggle with internalized misogyny, explaining how she equates being a woman with suffering, weakness, and a body that "hates you," despite no known misogynistic influences in her family.
4 pointsJan 24, 2025
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Honestly, everything you said really resonated with me. I tend to think that being a woman equals suffering, being weak, and having a body that hates you. Like, I don't think all women are inherently weaker just because they're not men, but I feel like I, personally, am weak and doomed to eternal suffering for not being a man and I don't even know where I learned that because as far as I know none of my family members are misogynists. How did you stop having this internalized misogyny??

Reddit user its-yanna (desisted female) comments on finding solace in shared stories about the difficulty of being a woman, feeling isolated from friends and family who don't share her feelings.
3 pointsJan 23, 2025
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Yes!! Sometimes I like to see other women's stories about how difficult it is to be a woman because it makes me feel less alone, it's a shame I don't know any women like that in real life. I've tried talking about it with friends and my mother, but it seems like I'm the only one who hates being a woman

Reddit user its-yanna (desisted female) comments on how identifying with a male character is a valid reason for a young girl to have wished she was a boy.
3 pointsJan 24, 2025
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It's definitely not a stupid reason to have thought that boys are better just because your favorite character was a boy. I understand connecting with a character so much that you want to be them or that they make you feel things for better or worse, I'm pretty much like that too lol