This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, there are no serious red flags indicating this is an inauthentic account or a bot.
The user's comments are detailed, emotionally charged, and contain specific, consistent personal anecdotes about their experiences with transition, detransition, and the physical and emotional effects of hormones. The language is complex and nuanced, not repetitive or scripted. The passion and anger expressed are consistent with the warning that detransitioners can be very passionate due to their experiences.
The account appears to be a genuine, if highly opinionated, individual.
About me
I started transitioning because I was a depressed young man who believed becoming a woman was my only path to happiness. The online communities I was in sold me a fantasy, but the reality of trying to live as a female with a male body was impossible and caused me severe anxiety. A truthful friend helped me see that transitioning was making things worse, not better. I stopped hormones and now understand that I was fighting a battle against my biology that I could never win. Since detransitioning, my suicidal thoughts are gone and I feel like my life has real possibilities again.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition started because I felt deeply uncomfortable with my body and believed that becoming a woman was the only way to fix it. I was born male, and from a young age, I struggled with low self-esteem and depression. I spent a lot of time online and was heavily influenced by what I saw in trans communities. I saw these before-and-after photos and videos of people who seemed to have completely transformed, and I became convinced that if I just tried hard enough, I could achieve that too. I thought transition was the key to a better, happier life.
I started taking estrogen. The emotional changes were significant; I felt more emotionally connected to sex, but it was a different kind of feeling. On my natural male hormones, sex felt like a powerful, physical need—a rush to just empty out and get that chemical release. It was a deep, sometimes overwhelming drive. On estrogen, it became more about the emotions and the excitement of the moment. My body changed too; my testicles shrunk, though they eventually went back to their normal size, which, from my experience, are bigger than average.
But the physical reality of trying to live as a woman was nothing like the online fantasy. I quickly learned that "passing"—truly being seen and accepted as female by everyone around me—was almost impossible. I used to look at FFS (facial feminization surgery) pictures online and think they were successful because the "before" pictures were so masculine. But in real life, I realized that surgery didn't make them pass; it just made them look more feminine. They were still visibly trans. Actual women's clothing, like dresses, never felt right on my body because my proportions—my shoulders, torso, and hips—were fundamentally male. I always felt most comfortable in androgynous clothes like jeans and simple shirts.
This disconnect between my expectations and reality led to intense anxiety and serious suicidal ideation. I had bought into this fatalistic idea that it was "transition or die." When I felt my goal of passing was unachievable, my life felt like nothing but distress and pain. I am so grateful that I had a trans friend who was honest with me about the unrealistic expectations. She helped me see that transitioning wasn't necessary and was only adding more negativity to my life. She pulled me back from the edge. It makes me angry to think about the "peppy" online communities that cheerlead people without telling them the truth, fueling this cult-like atmosphere that can lead to tragedy.
I don't believe in gender as an internal identity the way I used to. I think we are our biological sex, and trying to change that completely is fighting a battle that modern science just can't win. The tools aren't there to turn a man into a woman. Most males, including myself, vastly overestimate their ability to pass. We think, "If I just do my voice better, get laser hair removal, get FFS," but the truth is, the vast majority of us will never be seen as female in the real world. We might pass in a quick interaction with a store clerk or in a carefully crafted online photo, but that's not the same as living a full life completely unseen as trans.
I absolutely regret transitioning. It introduced so much pain and negativity into my life that wasn't there before. All the suicidal thoughts I had during that time have completely vanished since I detransitioned. Life feels full of possibilities again. I see now that my desire to transition was rooted in a warped view of what was possible, influenced by online communities that promote unrealistic expectations. I benefited hugely from non-affirming therapy—from having someone who didn't just affirm my feelings but challenged them and helped me see a different path.
Age | Event |
---|---|
24 | Started taking estrogen (hormones) |
26 | Realized I would never truly "pass" as female |
27 | Stopped hormones and began to detransition |
Top Comments by /u/kljhlkj88777:
Actual female clothing like dresses or specific female tops never felt comfortable because they were clearly designed for a body with different hip:torso:shoulder proportions than I had (and most males).
Just androgynous stuff like jeans and slim shirts or drapey things with more room were fine.
There are definitely tons of people that suicided because they lost their minds to fatalistic thinking like "transition or die".
I know because I had very strong suicidal ideation during the throws of transition when I felt like my "goal" was unachievable and therefore life was just distress and pain.
Now that I detransitioned all that suicidal ideation has been swept away. I no longer care or desire the previous "goal". Life is full of possibilities.
But I had very key people (one trans friend in particular) in my life that opened my eyes to the unrealistic expectations of "transitioning" which helped me pull back from the edge and discover that transitioning was not necessary, and had only introduced negativity into my life rather than being a path to a better me.
I imagine many trans people instead have friends that cheerlead them all the way to their suicides.
I often remember the "peppy" and "encouraging" trans redditors like "Lumberchick" that loved to help the "young transitioners" and yada yada everyones happy and OOOH you look so pretty girl!!!!
Then bam one day, shotgun to face.
There is so so so so much artificial fake, cult-like emotions and behavior that swirl around "online trans communities". All of this fuels the unrealistic expectations and fetishism of suicide.
You are not wrong in your assumptions. Look both genders or sexes or whatever you want to call them have qualities that give them VALUE in society. And it just so happens that the average female is only ever going to transition into a low value man and vice versa for MtFs.
I will also say that extremely short men are often insulted and not taken seriously either. There is a reason that incomes are correlated strongly with height (while its doubtful that intelligence is)
I had those changes as well. On estrogen I felt more "emotional" about sex, sex was more about feeling emotions and excitement.
My normal male hormones, its just something completely different. Sex, ejaculation, emptying my balls, giving my brain a rush of sex chemicals, its a need, not a desire. Its a power that can grab hold of you. During peaks its all I can think about and I will have to distract myself with other things to not fantasize about lusty sexual situations.
IDK about gentials, my balls shrunk but I don't feel like my dick width or length changed and my balls went completely back to normal size, from my experiences with other men they are much bigger than average. Though I would trade tiny balls for another 2 inches of dick, oh well.
But as someone else said, it depends, is your body functioning correctly or not? You need to check your sperm vitality and your hormone levels.
Science does not have good tools for turning a man into a woman. The problem with most trans people, especially MtFs, is that they vastly OVERestimate their ability to pass. "If I just train my voice, if I just get better hair, if I just laser my beard, if I just get ffs". When in reality the vast majority of males can do whatever they want, all the surgery and they still will not look like a female, they will not "pass" in a real sense. (no, "passing" in internet photos or casual interactions like with store staff is not the same thing as passing completely as female)
You should consider that you have a warped view of the "successful" trans people. I know from personal experience that the vast majority of trans MtFs that you see posting online that you find to be "Passable", don't pass and are often quite miserable and do not live "normal" lives as girls but instead live the same kind of shut in insecure life as most MtFs.
Looking more feminine than other MtFs does not mean you look female, especially outside of the crafted world of webcams and internet photos.
For example I used to think the majority of before and after ffs pictures showed passable trans women because the "before" was so masculine. But the reality is that ffs did not make them pass, and they essentially are stuck living as mostly visible trans woman. They just look more feminine than before.
I would bet any person any amount of money to guess and pinpoint that trans person. All of you will disagree, but most of time you will mistake a cis person for a feminine or masc cis person, even being very aware of the common differences.
Incorrect. With 99% (at least) of mtfs I can clock them after interacting with them for a brief period of time. Partly because I know the differences between male and female skeletons, but mostly because we as humans are able to instinctually gender people (though it becomes slightly harder with different races).
This entire subreddit is completely oblivious to the positives of transitioning.
Actually you are oblivious to the barriers to passing. You think a ton of MtFs pass because you read their comments online and they tell you that they pass. And you look at staged pictures or video online and they look "like" girls.
If you thought you would completely pass transitioning then you were already set up for failure in your transition.
The vast majority of MtFs go into transitioning "hoping" they will pass and believing that "it must not be that hard, maybe I just need FFS". When in reality something like 99.9% of MtFs do not pass.
There is no trans hate. You just don't understand passing and you don't know any MtFs that have been through the gauntlet, lived years as trans trying to pass, and knowing many trans women themselves and realizing that hardly any of them actually pass.
When you actually meet more MtFs you will realize how few actually pass. Its a vanishingly small number.
What do you even mean by "completely" passing? If someone clocks you... why wouldn't other people be able to? You think you can pass in 99% of circumstances and some 1% gets lucky and clocks you on a bad day, thats not how it works really.