This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account "luvGod7" appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The comments display a consistent, deeply personal narrative with specific, complex medical and psychological details (e.g., specific side effects from hormones, a traumatic personal event). The tone is passionate but measured, offering nuanced advice that aligns with the perspectives of many detransitioners and desisters. The user identifies as someone who attempted transition and then stopped, fitting the definition of a desister.
About me
I started transitioning because I hated being male and thought being a woman would fix my depression. The hormones made me extremely sick and the community made me feel unsafe, which culminated in a traumatic assault. I realized I was trying to fix a problem by causing more damage to myself. I stopped the hormones and now understand you can be a kind man without fitting a stereotype. I'm learning to accept myself as I am, though I regret the harm I went through.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition started because I hated being male. I couldn't stand the expectations that were put on me as a man. I looked at the attention girls got and thought I wanted that, not realizing it could be unpleasant too. I think I just had this idea that being a woman would be an escape from all the things I disliked about my life. I had really low self-esteem and I was deeply depressed. Looking back, I believe my gender dysphoria was caused by other underlying mental health issues.
I started taking hormones, and that's when things got really bad for me physically. I became extremely ill from the side effects. I started having constant migraines and terrible hot flashes. I had trouble breathing, was always fatigued, and had severe joint pain. It was a miserable experience. The hormones also messed with my head. I started to feel like I couldn't have my own opinions within the trans community I was in. If I questioned anything or was different at all, I felt like I would become a target. I was even gaslit into questioning my sexual orientation and what I actually wanted out of my transition.
The worst part of the whole experience was when I was raped by an older trans woman. That was the final straw that made me realize this path wasn't right for me and that the people I had surrounded myself with weren't safe. I'm not saying the entire trans community is terrible, but my personal experience was very damaging.
I eventually realized that I had been trying to "fix" myself in a way that caused more damage. I had always wanted to be more of a man, but I thought it was impossible because I wasn't a stereotypical "manly man." I thought transitioning was my only option, but I've since learned that there are ways to accept being male without having to fit a stereotype. You can be a caring, kind man who follows his passions. It's natural to want to balance masculine and feminine traits, and things like fashion are a great way to explore that without making permanent changes to your body.
Coming off the hormones was a relief. The extreme joint pain I had subsided a lot after I stopped. I also had a strange realization that I couldn't really remember what my body looked like before I started, which was unsettling.
I don't think transition is the right answer for everyone, especially if you don't have a long history of intense gender dysphoria. It's extremely taxing on your body and can lead to serious, irreversible health problems. My biggest recommendation to anyone questioning is to get lots of therapy and do deep self-reflection first. There are options for relieving gender dysphoria without transitioning. You are a worthwhile and awesome person just as you are. Your choices about your body are yours alone to make, and you should feel happy and secure in them, not pressured.
My thoughts on gender now are that being a man sucks and being a woman sucks too. I think being a person in this time period just kinda sucks. We get so caught up in these ideas of fixing ourselves that we lose sight of just accepting who we are. I do have regrets about transitioning because of the harm it caused me physically and mentally, and because I see now that I was trying to solve a different problem.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Late Teens | Began to intensely dislike being male and the associated expectations. Felt depressed and had low self-esteem. |
| 20 | Started taking cross-sex hormones. |
| 20-21 | Experienced severe side effects from hormones: migraines, hot flashes, breathing issues, fatigue, and joint pain. Mental health declined further. |
| 21 | Was raped by an older trans woman, which became a major turning point. |
| 21 | Stopped taking hormones. Physical symptoms like joint pain began to subside. |
| 22 | Began to understand my discomfort was related to not fitting male stereotypes, not a need to be female. Started the process of accepting myself as a man. |
Top Comments by /u/luvGod7:
It’s a really complicated interaction whenever hormones are involved. Some people love it, some people hate it. Personally, I became extremely ill from the side effects. I began having migraines, hot flashes, couldn’t breathe very well, fatigue, joint pain, etc. Not to mention, the extremely negative effects it had on my mental health. I began to feel like being different from the community at all would make me a target to them. I was even gaslit into questioning my sexual orientation and what I wanted out of transition. The straw that broke the camel’s back was when I was raped by an older trans woman. I’m not saying the trans community is terrible, just that the people I personally met weren’t great. My recommendation would be to only consider transition after lots of therapy and self reflection. Gender dysphoria can be caused by underlying mental illness like in my case. Also, don’t let anyone convince you that you must transition; there are options for relieving gender dysphoria without transitioning. You’re a worthwhile and awesome person just as you are. Your choices with what you do with your body are also solely yours to make and you should be happy and secure in them. Good luck with whatever you choose!
I definitely hated being male and the expectations that came with it. I wanted to attention that I saw girls getting not realizing that it can be unpleasant. Being a man sucks and being a woman sucks. I think being a person in this time period just kinda sucks. We get so caught up in trying to “fix” ourselves that we end up doing more damage in the long term. Whatever you decide is your decision, but just remember that you are the only version of you and that makes you special whether you’re a man or a woman.
I’m really sorry that that has been your experience. Unfortunately, it’s impossible to know those parts of the female experience because even if you transition you’ll never have a period or be able to give birth. Even constructed vaginas function very differently from naturally formed vaginas. The experience of being trans is extremely different from being a natural born member of a particular sex.
This seems like a normal feeling for someone your age. You should sit back and register how you feel. If you don’t have a history of intense gender dysphoria, you probably shouldn’t consider transition. Transition is extremely taxing on your body and can lead to very serious and irreversible health problems.
I experienced this for awhile. Then, I realized it was mainly that I couldn’t really remember what my body fully looked like before transition and the ligaments and joints were probably the same size or bigger than before. I don’t know if anyone else experienced extreme joint pain while on hrt but after I stopped the pain subsided a lot.
That you’ll constantly be looking forward to the day where you feel like all of the effort and pain has been worth it only to realize you’ll never truly feel like you are being true to yourself. Also, the various negative effects and sickness caused by cross-sex hormones.
I felt the same way because of my physical appearance. Being someone who isn’t a stereotypical manly man can be really confusing. I always wanted to be more of a man, but thought it would be impossible so I resolved myself to living as a woman even tho I didn’t really want to be one. I now realize there are ways to accept being male without being a stereotype. Being caring, kind, following your passions, etc I do think it’s natural for everyone to want to balance their masculine and feminine traits so I can totally understand having those thoughts of wanting to be more feminine. Fashion is great tool in helping explore those ideas of masculinity and femininity.