This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The comments display a consistent, highly personal, and emotionally complex narrative over a significant period (2023-2024). The user shares specific, gritty, and often distressing details about medical complications, emotional struggles, and the slow, non-linear process of detransition. The emotional tone—ranging from supportive to deeply distressed and regretful—is consistent with a genuine person grappling with a difficult experience. The account does not read as a caricature or propaganda piece.
About me
I started my transition as a teenager, convinced becoming a man was my only path to happiness. I took testosterone and had surgery to remove my breasts, but it never fixed the deep unhappiness I felt inside. The physical aftermath has been incredibly difficult, with painful health complications and changes that are hard to reverse. I deeply regret my surgery and now believe my pain required addressing my internal issues, not changing my body. Through therapy and self-acceptance, I am finally learning to live as a female again.
My detransition story
My whole journey started when I was a teenager. I was 16 when I came out socially as trans. At the time, I was completely convinced this was the right path for me and I told everyone, including myself, that I would never, ever regret taking hormones or having surgery. I truly believed that being a man was my only way to be happy.
I started taking testosterone and was on it for less than two years. Right after my 22nd birthday, I had a double mastectomy to remove my breasts, which I had always hated. The surgery was considered a success by medical standards. I passed as male 100% of the time. I had a deep voice, facial hair, and I could be completely stealth around people who had never met me before. On the outside, I had achieved exactly what I thought I wanted.
But my internal experience was completely different. Even though I looked like a man and everyone saw me as one, my gender dysphoria never went away. It didn't fix the deep unhappiness I felt. I realized that changing my body wasn't solving the real problems. I started detransitioning about four years ago and stopped testosterone in 2019.
The physical aftermath has been really difficult. My body hasn't gone back to how it was before. My menstrual cycles returned, but they're awful now—incredibly heavy and so painful I have to call out of work, which was never the case before testosterone. I have serious health complications from the mastectomy. I developed painful scar tissue that formed lumps in my chest; it was terrifying and it took a year of begging doctors before one finally checked it out. The scars go up into my armpits, making it hard to shave, and I have constant nerve pain and a feeling of insatiable itching along them.
I’ve also been losing my hair, and the facial hair I grew from testosterone is still there; I even get a five o'clock shadow, which is very distressing. A very personal and embarrassing effect is that, even five years after stopping testosterone, I still get erections from my enlarged clitoris and my libido is still very strong.
Socially, it's been a long road back. It's only been in the last year or so that I get read as female about 90% of the time. A big part of that was finally growing my hair out and wearing clothes that aren't so baggy, even though I don't always like how they feel. I moved to a state that isn't very LGBT-friendly, and now I get called "ma'am" regularly at doctor's offices when they ask about my menstrual cycle. When I do get called "sir," it feels like it's more of a bigoted comment about me being a lesbian rather than people thinking I'm trans.
Emotionally, I have a lot of regrets. I deeply regret my top surgery. I feel mutilated. There are times during intimacy with my wife that I break down crying and apologize to her when she kisses my chest. It’s a constant reminder of what I did.
What ultimately helped me wasn't transitioning, but a radical acceptance approach and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). I had to learn to deal with my issues without changing my body. The idea that people who detransition "weren't really trans" is ignorant and just wrong. According to the definition, I was trans. I transitioned fully and it didn't help me.
My thoughts on gender now are complicated. I don't think the answer for my pain was in changing my sex. For me, it was about addressing the deep-seated issues I had with myself and my body that had nothing to do with being born female.
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| 16 | Came out socially as trans. | |
| 22 | Had double mastectomy (top surgery). | |
| 2019 | Stopped taking testosterone. Began detransitioning. | |
| 2023 (approx.) | Began being read as female again regularly after growing out hair. |
Top Comments by /u/monstrousexistence:
I started detransitioning over 4 years ago, and only recently began being read as female again. Biggest difference is I finally decided to just grow out my hair this past year. But when I moved to an LGBT-hostile state and started going to the doctor, I am asked about my menstrual cycle and pregnancy status immediately. I get called ma’am on a regular basis. I do get called sir occasionally, but it’s usually a bigoted remark on me being a lesbian, not being trans.
I understand feeling mutilated. I deeply regret my top surgery, and also thought I’d never pass as woman. Growing my hair out, and wearing outfits that are less loose helped a lot.
How long have you been off T?
Regretful detrans woman here.
I had my double mastectomy right after my 22nd birthday. I passed perfectly. Facial hair, voice, I passed 100% of the time. I was even able to be stealth in situations where I had never met the person before.
I told the world and myself this is what I wanted and would want forever. I came out socially as trans at 16, again thinking I would never regret any hormones or surgery.
I detransitioned because even tho I passed 100% of the time, my double mastectomy was considered “successful” (as long as you ignored my complications the end result was what people typically want!), my name and sex were legally changed…
My dysphoria never went away.
I detransitioned.
I cry and apologize to my wife in the middle of sex when she kisses my chest now.
OP can ignore this warning if they wish.
My mom has PCOS and didn’t even tell me until I directly asked about hormone-related issues in our family medical history. Yesterday.
I have hated this long hair anyway, and with losing it I’m tempted to just cut it short again and wear some sort of feminine head wrap/cover, but my work doesn’t allow it unless it’s for religious or medical reasons (I work somewhere where you need a security clearance). I don’t know if losing my hair would count as a medical reason and I’m afraid of sounding silly. But this is truly distressing me. Losing my hair combined with the increase in noticeable facial hair (I had to dye it while on testosterone! And now I get five o’clock shadow!) makes me very upset because I think I am now “passing” as female less and less.
Hi, I’m from a state with the same rule. Can only change it once without a court order. I changed mine back with a court order but there was more info online about how to do so in my state. I really suggest reaching out the the law firms you mentioned. But you’re not alone. You can do this.
Same. According to the definition of transgender I’m still trans. Transitioning, even though I was able to pass as male 100% of the time, did not help my dysphoria. But a radical acceptance approach and CBT worked a lot better. The idea of detrans people “not actually being trans” is ignorance at best, and propaganda at worst.
I have been off of T since 2019. It has only been in the past year that I “pass” as female 90% of the time. A large part is that I grew my hair out and started wearing tighter clothes. I can’t stand it, but I was being harassed in restrooms and this is better. Give it time. You’ve only been off for two months. I understand that it can be really hard emotionally - fill your life with people and hobbies you love, and let time do its job.
Logically I know I need to see a medical professional, but it took a year of me bringing up a lump in my chest for someone to finally take me seriously and check it out. Luckily it was just scar tissue from my mastectomy, but I’m losing my hair /now/ and I’m afraid of having to beg for help for a year again. Plus I don’t even have health insurance right now. I can’t afford to go and be turned away. Thank you for commenting, I hope I am not coming across as rude.
I have a variety of issues so I’m sure I will forget some, but the most obvious that come to mind…
On T less than 2 years. Mastectomy. Off T for 5 years. No breast reconstruction.
My periods went from incredibly light (like. A couple drops of blood total) and painless to the pain being so awful and the period being so heavy I call out of work. It was irregular for years after stopping T but now is at least predictable in terms of regularity in the past six months.
Scar tissue from surgery manifesting as lumps (terrifying) and also making it near impossible to shave my pits (my scars go up my armpits). Nerve pain and a feeling of insatiable itching along my scars.
An effect I have that I have not seen mentioned and that I’m embarrassed to bring up but I need answers…I’ve been off T for 5 years. I still get “erections” from my enlarged clitoris. My libido is as strong as before testosterone. Does anyone else also get the “erections”…?