This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this user account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user demonstrates:
- Personal, detailed history: They share specific, complex, and emotionally nuanced experiences with transition, detransition, medication, and relationships.
- Consistent narrative: Their story remains coherent over time, including details about their medical history (6 years on T, hysterectomy), mental health (bipolar), and personal life (marriage).
- Human-like interaction: They engage in debates, show frustration, use humor (
😂), and offer empathetic support to others, which is complex for a bot to replicate consistently.
The passion and anger displayed are consistent with a genuine detransitioner who has experienced significant harm and stigma.
About me
I was born female and was a very masculine kid, which felt right to me but upset my parents. I transitioned to male in my twenties, taking testosterone for six years and having surgeries, believing it was the solution to my dysphoria. I later realized I had used transition to run from deeper mental health issues and that I needed to accept being female. I stopped testosterone, started estrogen, and now live happily as a butch woman. My journey taught me that you don't need to be a man to be a masculine person, and I'm finally learning to love myself.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been long and complicated. I was born female, but from a young age, I was very gender-nonconforming. People would often call me "sir" or "young man," which actually felt good to me, but it really disturbed my parents. They would always correct people forcefully, which made me feel mortified because I had what I now understand was severe dysphoria. I didn't see why it was such a big deal if people saw me as male.
In my teens and early twenties, I believed I was a trans man. I started taking testosterone and I was on it for six years. At first, it felt really good. My head felt clear and I felt confident and comfortable. I even had top surgery and a full hysterectomy, including having my ovaries removed. For a long time, about a decade, I felt comfortable with that decision. I thought it was the answer to my problems.
But as I got older, now that I'm 30, married, and have a stable life with a job and working on a master's degree, I started to realize that the turmoil was pointless. I began to understand that I needed to accept being female. The testosterone didn't help me ultimately grow and progress as a person; it didn't ease the other issues I had in my life that I had to look inward to solve. I feel like I was duped in a way, but ultimately, I made the choice to transition and now I have to live with it.
I have a lot of other mental health struggles, including bipolar 1 with psychosis, ADHD, and a history of complex trauma and an eating disorder. I see my gender dysphoria as another form of that, similar to body dysmorphia in anorexia. Getting proper medication and therapy, especially CBT, was integral to resolving my dysphoria. It helped me see that I was using transition as a way to hide from myself, a form of self-harm and dissociation. Now, I see that period as a time I was sick, and now I'm finally recovering and learning to love myself as a healthy adult woman.
I stopped testosterone about a year ago and started on estrogen because I had my ovaries removed. I take a medication called Estratest, which is estrogen with a small dose of synthetic testosterone, to mimic what women naturally have. My body still has some testosterone in it from my time on T, but I'm okay with that. I don't want to be completely without it because my sex drive tanks otherwise.
My detransition has been hard on my wife. She had just come out as a lesbian before she met me, but then she accepted me as a trans man and was hugely supportive of my transition. Now that I'm detransitioning and asking people to call me "she," it's been a struggle for her. I think she has some internalized homophobia and is scared about suddenly having a wife after building a life where she had a husband. She's not a terrible person; she just wanted me to be happy. We still love each other and have a healthy sex life, but it's a complex situation for both of us.
Now, I live my life as a butch woman. I don't regret my transition because I think it helped me stay alive long enough to realize I didn't need it anymore. But I also think it's criminal that transition is often touted as the only answer for dysphoria. I want to show people, especially young girls, that you can be a masculine woman and that's beautiful. You don't have to be a boy just because you don't fit a feminine stereotype. Most days, I'm okay. I get called "sir" a lot, and sometimes it's jarring, but I'm learning to exist comfortably in a gender-ambiguous space. My life is rich and full of things I love, and most of the time, I don't even think about gender.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Childhood | People often mistook me for a boy, which felt good, but caused distress for my parents. |
| Early 20s | Started identifying as a trans man and began taking testosterone. |
| Mid-Late 20s | Underwent top surgery and a full hysterectomy (including ovary removal). |
| 30 | Realized I needed to accept being female and began the process of detransition. Stopped testosterone. |
| 30 | Started taking estrogen (Estratest) to maintain hormone balance post-hysterectomy. |
| Present (30+) | Living as a detransitioned, butch woman and working on self-acceptance. |
Top Comments by /u/motaneul:
Right, I agree. All of those women are beautiful and I fully support their desire to be feminine, but that was never me. I was miserable when I was feminine and felt the most at peace in a masculine presentation. I don’t want to lose that just because I identify as female again. I want to show other women that butch is beautiful and they don’t need to be feminine to be valid.
Oh OP, I’m so sorry this is happening to you. Where do you live, did you say? We might be able to help you better if we know the country so we can tell you what laws they’re working with and how to go about changing back. I think it’s terrible they did all this with you being so young.
I feel weird saying thank you, because I know the comment was kind but I also don’t feel like there’s anything wrong with masculine women! I would be happy with more people recognizing me as a masculine female, actually. That’s sort of my goal. I don’t care to be extremely feminine, I just want more people to say “she,” and “ma’am” and “miss.” It’s starting to happen!
I think she just wanted me to be happy, that’s the thing. She thought this would make me happy and I can’t resent her for wanting the best for me. She’s not a terrible person. But there are lots of things she and I don’t agree on. For instance I would never let my child transition (if I had a child). She on the other hand believes puberty blockers are safe and then cross sex hormones and surgeries at 16 are acceptable. It terrifies me, honestly.
Hey, there, thanks for chiming in. I’m the woman in the video, actually. I’ve considered autoandrophilia but I experience no arousal from being a man nor do I have any fetishes. I had sex dysphoria from a young age. My story is no different from that of a true transsexual except that I regret my decision now. Many on this forum do. Stick around and read several of the posts on this sub; you will find we are not small in number.
Here’s my thinking. I just want you to be okay. I know you say that you don’t want to transition and become a gnc male but speaking as a gnc female, I think even just dressing more femininely or allowing yourself to explore gender presentation is a good idea. I agree that modifying your body with transition isn’t a good idea while you’re in such a desperate state of mind; I don’t think anyone should make permanent lasting decisions while they’re in distress. But in all honesty, I’m a lot happier having transitioned, and you might be too, even though you’ll never be a “real” woman. One bit of advice I have for you is to really analyze your thoughts and feelings a figure out what’s causing this distress. I wish I could have come to terms with the body I had because I think that my transition was in some ways a form of self-harm and dissociation. But I still feel better now than I did, and you might too. You don’t have to be trans to dress as the opposite sex. I don’t agree that it’s womanface. I’m not offended by males who want to be pretty. Speaking as a woman, I’d much rather you be safe and successful and at peace with yourself than for you to die on this hill. You’re not a danger to us. You’re not an AGP male. You’re not doing this for attention or clout. Honestly, I just want you to be healthy and happy. I just want your pain to stop.
I’ll second the idea of therapy. I think therapy, especially CBT, can do wonders for obsessive thoughts. I would argue gender dysphoria is a form of body dysmorphia similar to anorexia and bulimia, and as such I feel it can be treated the same way. I feel like CBT was integral to my resolving my gender dysphoria, and it’s part of why I feel like I can actually function today. I’ll also second the idea that you may have unresolved trauma that’s causing your dysphoria. I know I did. It could be that if you resolve that in therapy, you won’t need to transition anymore.
Please don’t hate yourself for feeling this way. You’re not a problem. Your body is not a problem. You deserve to feel better.
Whoa, I never said she was unstable, and it’s weird that you think I’m saying I thought she was. Maybe you didn’t read what I wrote carefully. I don’t think either of us is being unstable. I think this is a complex situation, in which neither one of us is objectively wrong or right. Also, I’ve been off hormones for a couple months now and already I’m beginning to change. I get called ma’am with relative frequency. She’s struggling with this because she fell in love with me one way and now, less than a year ago, I tell her I’m someone completely different. I even said that I understand how hard this is for her. She’s struggling to see me as a woman because she never has before, and that’s hard for her. But it’s also hard for me. Neither one of us is in the wrong here.
That’s awful. I’m so sorry. Her experience sounds similar to mine. Honestly? Get her away from the internet. That’s really the best thing you can do for her. I’m not saying tumblr causes people to be trans, but it certainly doesn’t help. Maybe spend more time with her, try to come up with some strong female role models she can look up to? Remind her every day that she doesn’t have to look or act like the other girls. That doesn’t make her a boy.
I understand your fears and I think you’re making the right choice about getting information in advance and carefully considering your decision. I’d love to talk to you more by private message if that’s okay? It’s kind of a long involved story. Also you can check me out on YouTube if you want more information that I haven’t remembered to tell you on here. Check out leoaica motanelul on YouTube.
I’m already off T and trying to live my life as a gender nonconforming female, and I’m changing back all my documentation and asking people to call me she. Most people are cool with it. But it’s hitting her very hard. I think she’s anxious about suddenly having a wife.