This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on these comments, the account appears authentic. The user expresses nuanced personal struggles with gender dysphoria, medical concerns, and mental health (OCD, autism) in a detailed, emotionally inconsistent way that is difficult to automate. The language is self-reflective and contains specific, real-world details (Brazilian healthcare, Paxil) that support a genuine human experience. There are no obvious red flags suggesting it's a bot or inauthentic persona.
About me
I'm a young man from Brazil who started feeling life would be better if I was born a girl when I was 12. After talking to a friend, those thoughts became an obsessive crisis that made me hyper-aware of my body and consider hormones. I realized my feelings were driven more by anxiety and a need to escape myself than by a true desire to be female. I decided against medical transition and am now seeking treatment for my anxiety and OCD instead. I'm learning to accept my body and work on my mental health at the root.
My detransition story
My name isn't important. I'm just sharing my story in the hope that it might help someone else feel less alone.
My whole journey with gender started when I was about 12 years old. I remember thinking that life would have been so much easier and better if I had just been born a girl. I felt like an outcast, like an alien, and I thought being a girl was the answer to that feeling. By the time I was 14, I started having fantasies about being a lesbian. It wasn't a sexual thing for me, as I've always identified as asexual, but more of a romantic and life fantasy. It felt like an escape from the person I was.
The real body discomfort didn't hit me until I was 18, and even then, it was just a minor annoyance in the back of my mind. I could live with it. The big change happened very recently. I made the decision to talk about these feelings with my best friend, who is a cis woman. After I told her, everything changed. It was like I had opened a floodgate. I couldn't rest anymore. I became hyper-aware of my body and consumed by the question of whether or not I should medically transition. I started reading everything I could find, and it just made me more scared and anxious. I learned about the potential health complications, like liver problems, and that the healthcare system here in Brazil wouldn't even cover the hormones.
I talked to my therapist about it a week after telling my friend. Emotionally, she said she believed I was trans, but she also said that scientifically, it was too soon to tell. She thought my asexuality might actually be a rejection of my body that could change after HRT. But the more I researched, the more I started to question if this was really about gender at all. I came across a study that compared people who transitioned to cis people, but not to people with dysphoria who didn't transition. That got me thinking.
I started to wonder if this was all rooted in something else. I've always felt like an alien, and I know that's a common experience for people who are autistic and get diagnosed later in life. I also considered if it could be a form of OCD, with these obsessive thoughts about my gender and body taking over. My anxiety was through the roof.
In the end, I decided not to pursue hormones or any medical transition. It felt like that path was driven more by fear and obsession than by a true desire to be female. I'm going to seek treatment for my anxiety with a neurologist instead, and try a medication like Paxil that can also help with OCD. I need to deal with the root of my problems—my anxiety, my depression, my low self-esteem, and the feeling of being an outcast—instead of trying to change my body to fix my mind. I've also made a point to avoid porn and anything misogynistic, as I don't want those things to influence my perception of women or myself.
Looking back, I don't think I was ever truly trans. I think I was a deeply anxious and depressed person who latched onto the idea of being a girl as a form of escapism. I regret ever bringing it up because it took a small, manageable annoyance and turned it into an all-consuming crisis. I'm glad I stopped before I did anything medical that I couldn't take back. I'm now trying to accept my body as it is and work on my mental health.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 12 | First started feeling life would be better if I was born a girl. |
| 14 | Began fantasizing about being a lesbian. |
| 18 | Started experiencing minor body discomfort (dysphoria). |
| 18 | Talked to my best friend about my feelings; body dysphoria became severe and all-consuming afterwards. |
| 18 | Spoke to my therapist about it one week later. |
| 18 | Researched HRT, became scared of health risks, and decided against medical transition. |
| 18 | Concluded my feelings were likely related to anxiety/OCD and sought treatment for that instead. |
Top Comments by /u/octaviosrex:
I consider myself to be assexual, but my therapist says the cause for this may be the rejection to my body, and that it may change after HRT. Also the more I read, the more I am scared of HRT, I learned that the Brazilian healthcare system does not cover it, and that I can get liver problems...
I wish I could return to before I first talked about this to a friend, then it was just a minor annoyance. Now I can't get rest, I am much more conscious of my body and thinking all the time wether I should proceed or not with transition. If only I realised this before puberty ruined my body...
When I was 12 I started to feel like life would be better if I was born as girl. I was 14 when I started fantasizing about being a lesbian. The body dysphoria started at 18 but it was just a minor annoyance, the body dysphoria peaked after I talked about it to my best friend (a cis female), one week later I talked about it to my therapist, she says emotionally she believes I am trans, but scientifically it's too soon.
This study is one of the first things I saw, sadly they did not compare people diagnosed with dysphoria who did transition with those who did not, the study seems to only contrast transitioners with cisgendered people... That said, I think I'll try to get a Paxil prescription from a neurologist, if this is OCD I'll probably know in a month.
I think the post is solved. I'll seek treatment to anxiety with a neurologist, PAXIL seems to be good for OCD too. About Depersonalization, it is already tested and excluded, the world to me is very real. I feel like an alien in the sense of being an outcast, it's very common between late diagnosed autists. I already avoid porn and I am really opposed to misoginy, these things won't be a problem.