This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The comments display:
- A consistent, deeply personal narrative with specific, lived-experience details (surgeon's name, location, specific physical results, personal dating history).
- Complex and contradictory emotions that are common in detransition stories (anger, regret, resignation, nuanced identity as nonbinary).
- A natural, conversational writing style with slang, rhetorical questions, and personal asides.
The views are strong and controversial, which aligns with the expected passion from someone who feels harmed by their transition experience.
About me
I was born female and was forced into transitioning by people around me when I was 18. I had a botched top surgery that left me with permanent, disfiguring scars, a constant reminder of a choice I never truly made. I’ve stopped hormones, but my body is permanently changed, so I now live as nonbinary. I realize my issues stemmed from internalized homophobia, not genuine dysphoria, and I have many regrets. I now feel lonely and stuck, caught between identities after a journey I can never fully reverse.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition is complicated and has a lot of pain in it. I was born female and for a long time, I was happy with that. But I made some very bad choices and got involved with some terrible people. When I was 18, I was forced into transitioning. I don't want to talk about the details because it's too triggering, but it wasn't my choice. I was stubborn and stayed around those people, and it led to this.
I started taking hormones and eventually got top surgery. The surgery was botched by the surgeon, Dr. Johnson in PA. She left large, disgusting fat sacks on the sides under my arms that weren't supposed to be there. When I tried to get it corrected, they told me it was just "back fat" and then they completely ghosted me. It’s been about nine years now, and it still annoys me every time I see my chest. It’s a constant reminder of a surgery I never really wanted.
Because of the hormones and the surgeries, I can't detransition fully. My body is permanently changed. So I've stopped hormones and now I just define myself as nonbinary. It’s the only thing that makes sense for me now, and I'm okay with that.
Looking back, I don't think I ever had real gender dysphoria. I think my issues came from other places. Before I transitioned, guys weren't interested in me, but girls were. After I transitioned, guys were too interested, which was its own problem. I spent a long time lying to myself and everyone else, saying I was a gay man and only hooking up with gay or bi guys. I denied that I was actually attracted to women. I think there was a lot of internalized homophobia there; it was easier to try and become a gay man than to just be a lesbian.
Now that I'm living as nonbinary, I feel awkward. I still look masculine, and I feel like when women are interested in me, they expect me to have a penis and be able to perform like a man. And from what I've seen, a lot of lesbians see trans guys as just guys, so that’s a no-go for them. It leaves me feeling pretty lonely. Making friends outside of work is really hard, and online friendships don't really cut it for me.
I have a lot of regrets. I regret the surgeries, especially since one was botched. I regret taking hormones. I believe HRT and surgery should only be for people with severe, real dysphoria, and I don't think I was one of those people. This whole thing feels like a huge joke that I got caught up in. I was influenced by the people around me and it led me down a path I can't fully come back from.
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| 18 | ~9 years ago | Was forced to start transition (hormones) |
| 19 | ~8 years ago | Had top surgery (botched by Dr. Johnson) |
| 27 | Now | Stopped hormones, living as nonbinary |
Top Comments by /u/plateauofsilence:
No, but the surgeon (Dr johnson) who did mine in PA botched the job and left large fat sacks on the sides under my arms which look disgusting and when I said they needed to correct it they said it was "back fat". Bullshit, back fat isn't on the sides. Then they ghosted when I tried calling over and over to get them to correct their fuck up. Oddly, the other surgeries she preformed she did NOT leave the fat sacks on anyone else, the photos just showed a flat area where my fat sacks are.
This isn't the reason I'm detrans but it still annoys me when I see my chest in the mirror and these globs of fat there. I havent called in a lawyer because the surgery was done a solid 9 years ago. My point for all this is I relate to your having a botched surgery. Maybe if and when I get reconstructive surgery done I can get them to fix what was botched.
As for me I was forced into transitioning. I dont want to go into detail about this since I domt want to bring back memories which will trigger me, but I was happy with how I was initially, but I made bad decisions regarding very vile people and my stubbornness in staying around those people led me to being forced into it, but ive had too many surgeries to detransition successfully so I'm just off hrt and define myself as enbee, since that's iah what I am at this point. And that is fine with me.
As for when I was forced into transitioning, it happened when I was 18.
Imo hrt and surgery should ONLY be given and reccomended to people with severe dysphoria. You aren't trans unless you have dysphoria, end of line. That's not to say those with dysphoria will be content or even happy with the hrt and surgery. This whole thing is a huge joke.
I was "hard gay" for a long long time, only hooking up with cis gays or bi/pan ones, and lying and denying that I am attracted to women. I'm not sure why if your a lesbian you'd want to be a gay guy since you're not attracted to men in the first place? Also I see tons of lgb rep in comics lately, but not traditionally. Its pretty great, but could use trans rep as well just to even things out some more.
I wonder why trans is included in the lgbqa. Lgb are orientations not lifestyles or having to do with gender and my 2p on that is it should be like lgbqia+ and then trans as its own category. Idk. Just my thoughts.
Guys weren't interested in me before I transitioned (but girls were), and after I transitioned guys were TOO interested in me. I've only started slowly detransitioning (to nonbinary, bc...well, hrt effects) and its had no effect in whos attracted to me.
Even though I've quit lying to myself about being attracted to girls, I still feel super awkward because I feel like they expect me to have a dick and be able to perform sexually since I still appear masc and from what ive read, a lot of lesbians view transguys the same way they view cis guys....as guys, so a no-go.
Do you have any friends that are guys? Might try starting with flirting with them and see where that leads. And if your of age, alcohol/weed leads to some frisky business, at least in my experience. Otherwise there is always grindr.
To me idc if they think im mtf (tbh they thought I was mtf in high school before I even transitioned 🤔). I'm genderfluid though soo...
Lonely? Absolutely. Making friends outside of work is painfully hard irl and text on a screen/video call doesn't cut it for me. Then again I think im a bit older than OP.