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Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it's a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's comments are highly personal, emotionally consistent, and offer nuanced, first-person advice that aligns with the experiences of many desisters. The language is natural, with conversational quirks and personal anecdotes, which is not typical of bot-generated content. The passion and perspective are consistent with a genuine desister.
About me
I started feeling really discontent with my body around 17, so I cut my hair short and dressed like a boy, thinking I might be non-binary. I now see I was just seeking control over my life and my negative feelings were amplified online. My detransition was a social one, and I realized I didn't need to change my body to find happiness. I found peace by embracing being a woman and focusing on self-acceptance instead of labels. I'm now 20, proud of who I was born as, and happy I never made any permanent changes.
My detransition story
My journey with gender was a confusing one, but I’m finally at peace with who I am. For a while, I thought I might be non-binary. I cut my hair super short like a boy’s and wore really masculine clothing. I’m so glad I’m out of that phase now. Looking back, I think I was just really discontent with my body, which I now know is a natural feeling, especially when you're young. The internet can amplify those negative feelings and distort your perception of reality, making you think you have to fit a certain standard.
I realize now that my feelings weren't really about wanting to be a different gender. I think it was more about wanting control. I felt powerless in my life, and the idea of transitioning felt like something I could control when everything else felt messy. It’s like when someone thinks losing weight will make them happy because it’s the one thing they can control, but then they get skinny and still aren't happy because they never dealt with the root problem of why they hated themselves.
I never took hormones or had any surgeries. My transition was entirely social, and my detransition was just me realizing I didn't need to change my body to be happy. True peace came from embracing who I am. I learned that I don't have to love myself right away, but I can practice just being neutral about my body. I started focusing on self-improvement, building a relationship with myself, and discovering my own personality outside of any labels.
I benefited a lot from changing the content I consumed online. I started watching self-improvement content creators for women. They were so positive and taught me a lot about accepting myself and finding the advantages in being a woman. It’s so fun being a woman now. I’m proud this is who I was born as. I love that I can feel pretty with some makeup and earrings but also wear cool streetwear or laid-back oversized clothing. My definition of being a woman is that I just am.
I don’t regret exploring my identity because it led me to where I am now, but I am glad I didn’t make any permanent changes. I see now that changing my body wouldn't have made me any happier. The answer was always to work on my thoughts and build healthier habits. I learned to let go and make my life simple instead of complicated. I embrace my womanhood completely; I think the ability to make and carry life is amazing, and men and women both have special roles that complement each other.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
Age | Event |
---|---|
Around 17-18 | Started feeling discontent with my body, cut my hair short, and wore masculine clothing. I lowkey thought I might be non-binary. |
Around 19-20 | Realized this was a phase. Began to embrace being a woman again by incorporating things I enjoyed, like light makeup and earrings, with my comfortable style. |
20 | Fully detransitioned socially. I am now happy and proud to be a woman, focusing on self-acceptance and self-improvement. |
Top Comments by /u/prettyseoul:
Hey man, be a girl in your own way. You don’t have to wear super feminine clothing. I wear sweats and hoodies majority of the times🤓 but wearing light makeup (mainly eye focus) and some nice earrings do compliment my feminine side so maybe you can try balancing something like that in that way? Try looking into women self improvement content creators, they give great advise and perspectives in womanhood
I was in a similar situation. Back of my mind I lowkey thought if I was non binary. I even had my hair super short like a boys. I wore super masculine clothing. I’m super glad I’m outta that phase now.
It’s so fun being a woman and I’m proud this is who I was born as. I like feeling pretty with some makeup and earrings but yet wear some cool street wear or laid back oversize clothings. My definition of being a woman is I just am😊
I think we are on the internet so much we think women are portrayed as something, standards, yada yada but when you go out, the women you see are just being themselves. Irl, everything is much more normal than what social media portrays. Being so sucked in the internet can be our downfall and distort our perception of reality.
So embrace your womanhood! Women are so special and I think the ability to make and carry life is so amazing. Even if you don’t want kids I think even we can admit this is very astonishing.
Men and women have their special roles. They are both good at something in their own way. Women might not be as good as men when it comes to certain things and vice versa. But this is why we compliment each other. And that’s how we can move forward and become one with the world. We do not need to be the same, where’s the fun in that then?
Good luck in your journey! I must say, being a woman is rlly fun and I hope you find joy and embracement in that too :)
If you’re young (12-18) it is natural to feel discontent with your body. But I promise you as you get older, acceptance does become easier (as long as you keep trying) embracing is key to neutralism. I think the internet often puts so many negatives on our bodies but there are many good sides to it too. You can look into fitness/healthy lifestyle. You will naturally feel more confident (dopamine) and accepting towards your body.
For me, I was in similar shoes like you. Personally for me I’m very happy as a woman now. Whether I can wear laid back oversize clothings with some makeup or dress more feminine, it’s so fun to be as I am. If you’re born a woman, look into self improvement women content creators. They are so positive and teach you a lot on accepting yourself as a woman and how to apply more advantages to yourself.
If you’re born a man, look into self improvement men content creators. They are also just as good. Whether men or women, they both give fresh perspectives and sort of a gentle wake up call.
Good luck friend, you don’t have to love yourself rn since that takes time but at the very least practice neutralism and stoicism :)
Nah I don’t mean it like that. However, you’re not your BPD. It doesn’t own you even tho it tells you it does. Don’t limit to what the disorder has set for you. Your journey might be more difficult compare to some others but the human mind is limitless. You should read books like “can’t hurt me” by David Goggins or an amazing testimony by this ex gang member Johnny on YouTube. These people went thru beyond adversity but to see that they were able to overcome mental illness and what bad cards life has dealt them, shows how limitless we really are when we don’t restrict ourselves to what our hardship/disorders tells us what we are suppose to be
It’s not that you want to transition. It’s the idea of having some sort of power in your life. From what I have read, you feel powerless and you want to control something. And transitioning feels like you’re in control because your life is a mess and you can’t seem to have control in anything
(Sorry my grammar is bad) I will tell you that if you aren’t happy now, you won’t be happy transitioning either. You will be more confused than ever as you try hard to fit yourself into something that was not meant for you. You should sculpt and mold with what you have now. You’re a man but you can just be yourself without thinking of anything of what you have to be to be a super masculine man.
It’s like a person wanting to lose weight thinking being skinny will make them happy. Because they can’t control anything else. They lose weight but never actually get to the root problem of why they hate themselves. They are skinny now! But wait… they still aren’t happy. Why? They are skinny now, what’s the issue? It doesn’t feel enough. They need to change more. Lose more. To fit into the standard to feel happy. (Based on a true story😌) I hope this analogy makes sense
True peace is embracing of who you are. This is you. This is the precious body you were born with. Changing or modifying it won’t make you any happier. Like the plastic surgeries celebrities get but deep down they are still not satisfied.
You can learn to accept and take steps to take control of what you can control. Your thoughts. Healthier habits/behaviors. What can you do in this moment? What books can help you redirect your thoughts. What type of social media content is wavering your negative thinking? What content are you consuming? Is it making it worse or better?
Good luck man
As complicated as this is in your head, it does not have to be this way. Life is either complicated because we make it complicated, or life can be simple because we make it simple.
Learn to let go and embrace yourself. Do what makes you feel good and makes you feel pretty or great. Starting building a relationship with yourself and discover who you really are as a person. What’s your personality? What do you like or dislike? What can you work on to grow as a mature person? The list is endless and you can start this challenging but fun journey now.
Do not let your emotions waver you. Emotions aren’t bad but we often let them take control of us without even realizing it is. Rationality is what can save us.