This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user shares consistent, specific, and personal medical and psychological details (e.g., hysterectomy due to endometriosis, autism, taking testosterone) over a multi-year period. The advice given is nuanced, empathetic, and logically consistent with the perspective of a desister.
About me
I never fit in as a teenager, and being autistic made the social rules of being a woman confusing and stressful. I thought my discomfort meant I was a man, so I started taking testosterone, but the changes felt wrong and I cancelled my planned top surgery. I realized my feelings were more about my autism and learning that I don't have to "feel" like a woman in a specific way to be one. I did have a hysterectomy, but that was for a painful medical condition, not for gender reasons. Now I've stopped hormones and am comfortable just being a woman who understands her brain is wired differently.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started because I just never felt like I fit in, especially as a teenager. I'm autistic, and I think that played a huge part in it. I never understood the social rules or felt like a "woman" in the way other people seemed to. It felt like everyone else got a handbook that I never received. This feeling of being different and not belonging created a lot of anxiety and low self-esteem for me.
I started to believe that my discomfort with my body, particularly my breasts, and my general unease during puberty, meant I was transgender. The idea of being a man felt like a neat little box I could fit into, a clear solution to the confusing gray area of just being a gender-nonconforming person. I think I was influenced a lot by what I saw online, where everything was presented in very black-and-white terms. I took testosterone for a while, hoping it would finally make me feel right.
But it didn't. The changes from testosterone were unique and annoying, and I quickly realized I didn't actually want to be a cis man. I was about to get top surgery, but I decided to cancel it. I'm so glad I did. Surgery is a massive, permanent deal, and it's okay to not feel comfortable with it.
What really helped me was realizing that my brain just works differently. Being autistic means I don't relate to my body or social concepts in a typical way. I learned about conditions where people's brains don't recognize parts of their own body, and it made me see that brains can malfunction or just be wired differently. For me, the answer wasn't to change my body to match a gender identity, but to work on accepting that I don't have to "feel" like a woman in some specific way. I just am one. I benefited from counseling to work through this.
I had a hysterectomy, but it wasn't for gender reasons. I had horrible endometriosis and one of my ovaries was causing constant pain. I wanted to stop dealing with birth control and periods. While it did cause me some bladder issues, I have no regrets about that specific surgery because it solved a serious medical problem. I kept one ovary.
I don't regret my transition journey because it led me to a place of deeper self-understanding. But I do regret taking testosterone. I wish I had understood that my feelings were more about my autism and a difficulty coping with gray areas than about being born in the wrong body. Now, I'm just me. I'm comfortable living as a woman, understanding that my experience of that is just different because of how my brain is wired. If I can forget about the subject of gender entirely, I find that I'm happy underneath it all.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| ? | Started feeling general discomfort and not fitting in during puberty. |
| ? | Began identifying as transgender. |
| ? | Took testosterone. |
| ? | Decided to cancel planned top surgery. |
| ? | Stopped taking testosterone. |
| ? | Underwent hysterectomy (for endometriosis, not gender-related reasons). |
Top Comments by /u/rageneko:
Yeah I'm gonna agree with everyone else and say don't do it then. You can always decide to later, but you can't really undo that.. it's just logical. I myself was about to get top surgery but decided not to. Surgery is a big deal. It's ok to not feel comfortable with it.
I was much the same and after a while I realized it was mostly my autism causing me to feel so different, and that I didn't actually want to be a cis man.
FYI hormones can cause some very unique and annoying changes, I wish I hadn't taken T. Thankfully my issues are minor but still.
That's your framing of the situation, but as many like me can attest, gender never made sense to me to begin with. I'm autistic so maybe that's why I don't "feel" like a woman. I know biologically I am, but it's just not something that I feel a part of in any other way.
I'm curious if you are willing to discuss some other things, like are you on the spectrum? I ask because I am, and many who are can't cope with gray areas. Are you in school? Often there will be free counseling available. I know I struggle with being gnc because of wanting to fit into a neat little box. But at some point I realized it was useless to fight myself on this and realized that if I could forget the subject of my gender, I was happy underneath it all (mostly).
I mean I got one but that was because of horrible endometriosis and stuff. Plus I didn't wanna have to deal with birth control ever again. It's nice to not have periods anymore. I kept one ovary, the other one was causing pain regularly. If it's not bothering you, maybe cancel. You can always get it removed later.
Edited to add that it did cause me some bladder issues, even though I have no regrets that's still a thing that came with it.
It might interest you to know that there are disorders where people's brains don't recognize certain parts of their body as their own. Brains just malfunction sometimes. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asomatognosia At that point, it all depends on what treatment works best for you.