This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a fake persona.
The comments show:
- Consistent, detailed personal experience with transition (specific medications like Lupron and Finasteride) and detransition (tapering hormones, surgical advice).
- Nuanced and evolving views that are critical of both trans activist and gender-critical groups, which is consistent with a genuine, complex personal journey.
- A consistent voice and writing style over several months, offering practical advice and introspection.
The passion and criticism present are well within the expected range for someone who has experienced the harm they describe.
About me
I started transitioning because I was deeply unhappy and confused my depression and anxiety for gender dysphoria. I rushed onto hormones, but they made me feel worse and the changes felt hollow, like I was forcing an identity. I realized my true issue was other mental health problems, not my sex, and I decided to detransition. I tapered off the medication slowly and found therapy for my underlying issues far more helpful. Now I understand that being happy as a man is more important than trying to become someone I'm not.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was really struggling with my mental health. I was dealing with a lot of things all at once: anxiety, depression, and the effects of past trauma. I had low self-esteem and felt very isolated after moving to a new city. At the time, I confused all of these feelings with gender dysphoria. Looking back, I realize I only had a small level of actual dysphoria, but it felt huge because I was so unhappy.
I started thinking about transition because it gave me a clear, far-off goal to strive for. I now see that this is a classic way to try and treat depression—you focus on one big change that you think will fix everything. I decided to transition very quickly; it was only about a month from making the decision to starting hormones. The way I got hormones was pretty fast, and I think some therapy and actually living in the role for a while would have helped me, but I was so sure at the time that no one could have convinced me otherwise.
I was on estrogen and an anti-androgen. The medication really messed with my body and my mental health in bad ways. I was on Lupron for a while and it made me feel borderline suicidal for about three months until I switched to finasteride. The changes from the hormones felt hollow to me. It was like I was forcing my life through an identity instead of letting one develop naturally. I realized I was "boy-moding" whenever I could because it was easier and more comfortable; I didn't feel like I was putting on a show.
A big part of my confusion was related to autogynephilia (AGP). I think it's something that needs to be thought about carefully. If you can live without transitioning, you probably should. The reality of life as a trans woman is very different from the fantasy, even if everyone is supportive. I also think I was influenced by bad advice from online trans communities. I was told to hide my other mental health issues from the gender clinic because they might prevent me from getting treatment. That was true—they didn't seem to care about helping with my underlying issues—but lying was a red flag I shouldn't have ignored.
I decided to detransition because the hormones were making me unhappy and I realized my dysphoria wasn't what I thought it was. In fact, I was feeling dysphoria more from the fact that I wasn't feeling it when I thought I was supposed to. I had been cutting out huge parts of my life and personality because they wouldn't have fit with "passing." Detransitioning was the right choice for me. It’s healthier to detransition if you’re not truly trans.
I don't regret transitioning in the sense that I blame others. I wasn't caught in a "cult." I made a mistake, realized it, and changed. I think it's important for people to take responsibility for their own decisions. The process of detransitioning was daunting, but I broke it down into small steps. I tapered off my hormones slowly, stopping the anti-androgen first and then reducing the estrogen over a couple of months, and I talked to a therapist about my depression. That helped me more than anything.
Now, I believe that what matters isn't your biological sex, but how happy you are living as a man or a woman. Life as a trans person is very difficult, and if you don't have crippling dysphoria, you shouldn't take transition lightly. For me, my problems were rooted in other mental health issues, not in my gender. I benefited greatly from non-affirming therapy that helped me untangle all of this.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| (Age not specified) | Decided to transition. |
| (Age not specified) | Started Hormone Replacement Therapy (Estrogen and Anti-Androgens). |
| (Age not specified) | Switched from Lupron to Finasteride due to severe mental health side effects. |
| (Age not specified) | Realized my dysphoria was misidentified and decided to detransition. |
| (Age not specified) | Stopped anti-androgens and began tapering off estrogen over several months. |
| (Age not specified) | Engaged in therapy focused on underlying depression and anxiety. |
Top Comments by /u/reclaimingkevin:
1 - if you believe trans meds (and you should) being misgendered causes dysphoria because it reminds you of the masculine aspects of your body that you hate. No bottom dysphoria is (IMHO) something that warrants having him talk to a counsellor about.
2 - There's a small correlation but nobody has ever bothered to attempt to find a causation.
3 - Not convinced this is particularly prevalent or an actual explanation of why gynopholic AMABS transition. I'm aware "stop watching porn" is a common response here but it's coming from a source with a very specific agenda. If he doesn't expect transition to change his personality he's in for a shock-most pre transition people vastly underestimate the impact hormones have on personality.
4 - I'm convinced euphoria is just the alleviation of depression and dysphoria that hasn't been given a name.
The problem with this sub is not gender critical people - Joli is quite clearly rigidly GC - it's non detrans people, Conspirscy theorists and lunatics talking over us and using us as political ammunition.
It is completely inappropriate for a trans person to try and police what. Is and isn't acceptable for detrans people to discuss.
Literally nobody is patting detransitioners on the back, but once you're done with it you can just exit stage left in social terms (harder for detrans women unfortunately).
Detrans is healthier if you're not trans. Not sure what's difficult to understand about that.
No. The guy who came up with it recommended transition for people with AGP. It is however something to think carefully on - if transitioning is something you can live without then do so. AGPs tend to have a warped view of how life as a trans woman will be and the reality (even if everyone is accepting and supportive) is a very stark contrast.
A lot of this sounds like co-morbid body dysmorphia. Talk to a therapist about it if you can, especially you end up considering cosmetic surgery.
Passing isn't everything, very few trans women pass. The benefit is if you're femenine enough to be happy with yourself. If you're not this is something to explore.
I can testify to E and AAs having a negative effect on mental health - what are you on? Not all AAs are created equal.
Before you make any decisions talk to a therapist. Talk to your doctor and ask about your meds. I was borderline suicidal on lupro for around 3 mo this until I switched to fin. Its not a proper AA but having some testosterone in your system while you figure things out will help a lot IMHO.
I'm not convinced there's a reason to disclose being detrans until you're comfortable with the other person. Even then just be vague af and talk about "a phase I went through wrt gender when I was younger". I don't think you need to disclose your prescription or medical history to anyone.
I honestly think whether or not people who detrans are trans positive or not afterwards comes down to whether we accept responsibility for our own mistakes or just look for someone to blame. I'm aware that's easy to say as a detrans male as opposed to female though.
Don't try and do everything at once. Break down everything into small manage steps then milestones for each one and just set a task for a day / week. Don't think about "omg detransitioning" but think more on "this week I'm tapering down E to Xmg" or "I'm talking to a therapist about this aspect of depression". Before you know it you'll be far along.
Gynocomastia surgery, it's something that's so common among bodybuilders (especially in America and other countries where you can just buy steroids as and when) that it's cheap, available and cosmetic. It's shit but it's a lot cheaper than the FFS/SRS you may have been saving for. For now just lose weight if you're overweight and wear a compression vest.