This story is from the comments by /u/rose_creek that are listed below, summarised with AI.
User Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the comments provided, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user provides a highly detailed, personal, and consistent narrative spanning years of their detransition experience, including specific medical details, emotional struggles, and a clear, evolving timeline. The writing style is nuanced, emotionally varied, and engages with others' posts in a supportive and specific manner, which is not typical of bot behavior. The passion and anger expressed are consistent with the genuine experiences of detransitioners.
About me
I was born female and started identifying as trans at 16, deeply influenced by childhood trauma I hadn't processed. I was on testosterone for ten years and had surgery, believing it was the only way to feel safe. After stopping hormones, I finally confronted my trauma and realized my transition was an attempt to escape being the person who was hurt. I now deeply regret my surgery and am grieving the permanent loss, but I don't regret the journey that led me to understand myself. I'm in my mid-thirties now, and after a difficult detransition, I finally feel at home living as a woman.
My detransition story
My journey with transition and detransition is long and complicated, and it’s taken me many years to understand it. I was born female and I started identifying as trans when I was 16 years old. I was deeply influenced by sexual trauma I experienced as a child. At the time, I denied that the trauma had anything to do with it and fully believed I was born in the wrong body. I think a big part of my transition was about safety; I had a fear of growing up to be a woman in a world where I didn't feel safe or respected. I couldn't imagine holding my trauma as a grown woman, and being a man felt like a way to escape that.
I started taking testosterone when I was 18 and I had top surgery, a peri-areolar mastectomy, that same year. I was completely sure at the time and had no doubts. I understood that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed, and I accepted that because I felt too broken to ever have kids anyway. I was on testosterone for ten years, until I was 28. For a long time, about 15 years, I identified as first a trans man and then as non-binary. I didn't have any regrets about my surgery for all those years.
My feelings started to change slowly. I stopped taking testosterone at 28, but I didn't start actively detransitioning until a few years later. It was a very slow recognition. A major turning point for me was working with plant medicine and psychedelics. This wasn't why I started that work, but it gave me a bigger capacity to process my childhood trauma. Through that, I began to remember that the trauma was the real reason I transitioned—it was a way to keep myself safe and to disconnect from the person who had been hurt.
As I began to process that trauma, I started to re-embrace my femininity. I began to come into my embodiment as a woman. This was when the regret about my mastectomy really set in. I realized I had removed a healthy, functioning organ from my body. Implants or a fat transfer can't bring back breast tissue, in function, feeling, or aesthetics. It’s something that can never be undone, and I grieve that loss deeply, especially now that my feelings about having children have changed as I've gotten older.
The process of detransitioning itself was scary. I was terrified that people would always see me as a trans woman and that I’d never just be seen as a woman again. For about a year and a half, that’s exactly what happened, and it was sometimes very painful. But I knew I had to go through that awkward phase to get to the other side. The biggest physical changes came from laser hair removal—I had 15 sessions on my face over a year and a half—and from intentionally gaining a little weight so my body fat could redistribute. I also did some voice training but mostly just learned to accept my deeper voice as my own. Now, people are consistently surprised when I tell them my history; they just see me as a woman.
Changing my name back was a huge part of my healing. I used an interim feminine name for a while before I felt ready to go back to my birth name. It felt really strange and awkward at first, like people knew a secret, but eventually it started to feel normal and even nice. My family, who had been supportive of my transition, was relieved and supportive of my detransition.
My thoughts on gender now are that it’s incredibly complex and often tied to things we don’t fully understand about ourselves. For me, it was rooted in trauma and a desire for safety. I do regret my transition, specifically the permanent surgery. I regret removing a part of my body that had function and meaning. However, I don't regret the journey itself because it brought me to where I am now, and I’ve learned so much about myself. I’m now in my mid-thirties, and I’m dating, living in a supportive rural community, and finally feeling at home in myself as a woman. It took a long time, a lot of therapy, and a lot of patience, but I’m glad I’m here.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 16 | Began identifying as transgender. |
| 18 | Started testosterone and had top surgery (peri-areolar mastectomy). |
| 28 | Stopped taking testosterone after 10 years. |
| 33 | Began the active process of social detransition. |
| 33 | Started laser hair removal on my face and body. |
| 34 | Legally changed my name back to my birth name. |
| 35 | Underwent significant physical changes from fat redistribution and continued laser, leading to being consistently perceived as female. |
Top Reddit Comments by /u/rose_creek:
I would highly suggest reading the chapter on breasts in the book Eve: How the Female Body Drove 200 Million Years of Human Evolution. I found it pretty mind blowing.
Beyond that - why remove a healthy functioning organ from your body? Our bodies do a lot more than we know - and one thing we know is that breast tissue produces a bit of hormones.
Additionally, you may or may not decide you’d like to have kids later in life. This changed for me as I approached 30.
Thanks for clarifying. Wanted to ask before offering something you didn’t want.
I tended to wear really feminine things prior to detransition and had long hair / clear stubble after shaving so my experience is a bit different but I’ll share from my perspective.
I had to accept that people were going to see me as MTF for a period of time due to that. Nothing I could wear would change that. What was and has been helpful has been wearing things that highlight my curves - high waisted, tight jeans have had a huge impact - rather than trying to cover things up.
Things that are feminine but plain seem to cue people better IMO. Even though some days I prefer my eyebrows a bit more natural, keeping them well shaped seems to help, too.
Most importantly, I wear what feels good to me and that confidence exudes itself. It’s a process. Now that my facial hair is all gone, strangers “ma’am” me 100% of the time, regardless of what I’m wearing. It felt like the awkward time of being seen as something other than female wouldn’t ever end but one day it just did.
I also experienced CSA and while part of me knew it was the cause for my transition, I denied it and touted the “born in the wrong body” narrative (this was 15+ years ago). I agree with what others say about waiting.
What I want to add to the conversation is that I hope you’ll look through the posts here of detrans women struggling to deal with their mastectomies / top surgeries. Implants are not the same as mammary tissue. Neither is a fat transfer. This surgery is not the panacea it is touted as by plastic surgeons, and it is not reversible. I wish I had never done it and I have been struggling with that for several years.
Yes. I noticed a Peter Pan complex in myself and others. For me, it was largely a fear of holding the sexual trauma I endured as a grown woman. I couldn’t imagine continuing to be harassed and possibly abused further. I also couldn’t imagine being a man, which I associated with my abuser. So, I kind of languished in an between… in a kind of child limbo.
Hey. First, I want to say I hear you. I had this fear, too. And do you know what? For about a year and a half, people thought I was a trans woman (actually, probably longer than that when I thought of myself as non-binary). It was sometimes very painful - but the reality for me was that I was never going to get back to being known as a woman if I didn’t go through that part of the process.
I’ve had moments this past year where people have made supportive comments about me “transitioning” and when I’ve felt resourced and when they’ve been people in my local community, I disclose my story because I don’t want them to think I’m a trans woman.
Now?! I meet new people and I’m just seen as a woman. The absolute biggest thing has been laser. It’s been over a year, every month, and my face is just now almost clear. The other thing has been intentionally gaining a bit of fat (something I was restricting to not look feminine). Sometimes, this whole process has felt exhausting, overwhelmingly sad, lonely, and without end in sight. But - a year and a half or so out of my lifetime is not so long. If I didn’t detransition due to fear, I would still be where I was - and I’m so, so glad I’m not. I identified as trans for over 15 years, was on testosterone for 10, and while I’ve been off for 6 years, really laser and fat redistribution have made the biggest changes.
You absolutely won’t look like you do for the rest of your life. The only thing inevitable is change. Keep sharing how you’re feeling - we are here, we are navigating this together.
Give yourself space to feel it, to grieve - to be angry, sad, confused, lonely - don’t try to push it away. Emotions need your attention. The more you’re able to tolerate & be with challenging emotions, the more capacity you also build for experiencing joy. It sounds like your girlfriend is able to witness you - that’s wonderful. Perhaps also see if you can connect w some women who have had top surgery & detransitioned - I know that’s been helpful for me. I’d encourage you to try to open up to other people you’re close to. You may find they’re able to hold space for you. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Hi, I stopped taking testosterone at 28 after 10 years taking it and had a mastectomy at 18. I’ve been off 7/8 years now, and I can’t believe how far it all feels behind me. My face and body have changed shape a lot and after a million rounds of laser, I basically am free of body and facial hair. Sometimes people assume I am a trans woman based on my voice and flat chest but it doesn’t seem to happen often (I’m sure some people think that because they’ve watched me detransition but weren’t aware). I am dating a straight cis man. It took time - detransitioning is a slow process- but it has been wonderful and healing and I am so glad I decided to do it.
I’m so sorry this happened to you and that you are experiencing so much pain. You were and are a minor and you trusted the adults around you to guide you. You have nothing to be ashamed about.
I transitioned pretty young (though not as young as you) and had a lot of fears of detransitioning. I was on testosterone for 10 years and have been off for 6 (it was a slow recognition that I was detransitioning). I was worried I would be perceived as a trans woman forever. Sometimes I still am. But slowly, my body is healing. It is taking me a lot of patience and courage.
I am also a suicide attempt survivor - as a teenager I was convinced the best option was for me to no longer exist. I am so happy i survived, and have been fortunate to grow, be known, share my stories, be part of my family, and make wonderful friends. I know that it can seem dire and never ending. I’m not saying life has been easy but it has been beautiful. My opinion is you should exhaust every option before considering suicide. It’s the one thing you can’t take back - and like transition, it might seem perfectly rational and you may come to regret it. I’ve gotten to experience so much that I couldn’t even fathom as a teenager. I wouldn’t have believe it if someone told me.
It’s understandable and ok to be angry and exhausted, but when you are ready, I encourage you to ask for help. Let the people in your life know how much pain you are in. Look for an understanding therapist, be honest about how you’re feeling. Look for a new doctor. Reach out. Seek alternative treatment. Do whatever feels good even if it’s not the most acceptable thing.
Your voice is important and you deserve to enjoy your life. You don’t know what the future holds, but it’s in your hands.
I resonate with a lot of what you shared. I experienced CSA, and my mom believed I was transitioning because of that. Once I “passed” as male, I began to re-embrace my femininity. As a kid, I was both very feminine and a tomboy.
When I shared that I was detransitioning, my family, and particularly my mom, were relieved and supportive.
TBH I didn’t know how to go about detransitioning either - I just took it a day at a time. I’m quite feminine, and it’s felt more comfortable to express that in the world as I’ve worked to heal my sexual trauma.
I was on testosterone for 10 years, and have been off 6+ years (but actively detransitioned for 2). I worried I’d always appear to be trans, but now if I disclose that I took testosterone for 10 years / detransitioned people are more perplexed. I have a deeper voice and my chest is almost totally flat but people can see that I’m a woman. It took time, some work with my voice, and a lot of laser, but it happened.