This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's story is highly specific, emotionally nuanced, and internally consistent over a three-year period. They describe deeply personal and painful experiences with surgery regret, body image, and the emotional process of detransitioning in a way that rings true. The language is natural, includes personal asides and emojis, and shows a clear evolution in perspective over time, which is difficult to fake convincingly. Their passion and criticism are consistent with a genuine detransitioner's perspective.
About me
I was born female and my journey started with a deep unhappiness with my body and low self-esteem during puberty. I thought taking testosterone and having top surgery would fix my self-hatred, but after surgery, I immediately realized it was a mistake and my mental health didn't improve. I stopped hormones, detransitioned, and now live peacefully as a woman again, though I have regrets about my altered body and infertility. I've learned that my true issues were depression and anxiety, not my gender. Now, I'm focused on self-acceptance and moving forward with my life.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition was a long and difficult one, and it started with a deep unhappiness with my body. I was born female and from a young age, I hated my breasts when they developed. I felt really uncomfortable with my body during puberty and had a lot of general self-hatred and low self-esteem. I think a lot of my feelings were tied up in depression and anxiety.
I started to transition socially, and then I began taking testosterone. I thought that if I just kept going further into transition, all those bad feelings would go away. I was convinced that getting top surgery was the final step to feeling free and happy. But after I had the surgery and the bandages came off, I had this immediate "uh oh" moment. My chest looked awful to me; my nipples were messed up and a lot of the tissue fell off during healing, leaving me with just sad-looking areolas. The scars are dark and raised, and I have patches of skin where I can't feel anything anymore. Most importantly, getting a flat chest didn't fix my self-hatred. I just had a new thing to hate instead of my old breasts.
That surgery was what finally forced me to admit I wasn't happy and that I had made a mistake. I had huge anxiety about detransitioning, but I also felt a tremendous sense of relief once I started. I stopped testosterone and began to look more feminine again. My face changed back a lot and now I pass as female. These days, my head is clearer than it has been in years.
I don't really have strong feelings about gender anymore. I found that as I detransitioned, I cared less and less about pronouns. Sometimes people still accidentally call me "sir" or "him," and it really doesn't bother me. I've learned that life is so much bigger than what pronouns people use for you. I also realized that most people aren't paying that much attention to me or judging me; a lot of that fear was just my own low confidence talking.
I do have regrets about my transition, specifically about having top surgery. I miss my original body and I feel pretty upset about my chest sometimes, especially the scars and the loss of sensation. I am now infertile from the testosterone, which is sad, but I've come to terms with the fact that I can't have bio kids and that adoption is an option. I don't see my entire transition as a mistake, more like a difficult life lesson that I can now use to help others.
I think it's really important for anyone questioning their gender to find a therapist who will challenge their opinions, not just affirm them immediately. I feel like the pressure to transition came a lot from online communities and the broader trans movement, which made it seem like the only solution. I sometimes wonder if therapists were pushed into being less cautious.
Now, I'm done messing with my body. I'm focusing on accepting myself as I am and moving on with my life. I have a partner who has been with me through both transition and detransition, and that support has meant everything.
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| 23 | 2019 | Had top surgery. Realized it was a mistake shortly after healing. |
| 23 | 2019 | Stopped taking testosterone and began to detransition. |
| 24 | 2020 | Living as female again. Feeling clear-headed and at peace, though coping with surgical regrets. |
Top Comments by /u/s1lk7:
I found that as I detransitioned and started to look more fem the less I cared about pronouns. Sometimes people still call me a guy and I really don't mind. Life is so much more than she/her him/his and whatever else you might go by. There's a bigger picture to things and you shouldn't let your feelings be ruled by something like pronouns. So maybe try taking a deep breath and recognizing that no matter what people may say, it doesn't necessarily mean much.
Hey there! You aren't disgusting. I'm 24 and I was on t as well had top surgery. I feel pretty ucky at times about my chest but I've come to terms with it. You can and will find someone that'll love you no matter what. A body is just apart of what's in the relationship and quite frankly it's just a benefit. You're personality will shine and trump. Take some time and think on everything. There's no harm in making mistakes since they help you grow.
Too me transition and detransition doesn't mean a mistake, it means it's a tool I can use to help others.
Also there's breast reconstruction and nipple reconstruction available. :) The results are quite amazing.
I had a alot of body issues before my surgery and during my transition, I chalked up alot of it to needing to further myself into transition. Now, my breasts from binding really got messed, they were not pretty and I'm also over weight so when I had surgery I thought Id feel free. I just felt really weird. Empty. The bandages came off and my nipples looked awful.
After healing alot of my nipple fell off so now their sad little areolas, my scars are dark and unfortunately kelioded, there's patchy areas where I can't feel anything and I doubt it's coming back since it's been a year.
Also it didn't change my self hate, I got a flat chest to hate on now rather than my sad floppy chest.
😒 I miss my nipples man.
I think that in the beginning of detransition most of us have felt pretty dumb. It is sad that you can't have bio kids of your own but that doesn't stop you from having a partner who can be the bio or adopting. There are plenty of children out there that are waiting wide eyed. I get that there will be a disappointment in the no bio thing, but again if you do adopt you'll be changing someone's life probably for the better. I used to feel like that about the washroom. I went off t and my face moved around a whole bunch and I pass now :) I'm sure you will too. Just give yourself the chance and if need be there's alot of gender neutral washrooms this day and age. When I detransitioned I felt the same, what I needed was a therapist, someone to talk my feelings through but again there's no point in dragging the regret with me. You got this, the beginning is always awkward and confusing. Like I said just take time and think. Focus on things you DO like about yourself. I love how my natural face looks, I think I'm rather pretty. Sometimes it's what gets me through my rough days
- Well, I was having alot of questions before too surgery and brushed it off on nerves..after surgery it was a ...uh oh moment after healing and seeing my chest and everything clicked in place.
- Yes and no, there was alot of "you sure?" And people were very encouraging that I kept on my path however when I formally decided I wasn't they were very supportive too.
- I haven't told any doctors
- It is toxic and blegh
- Eh not really sure, I guess I do. But I am super into like extreme caution.
- Potentially, I think all things eventually heard but I think it'll be twisted in a very bad way.
- I think my chest is gross but it's whatever at this point. I got a hairy chin but I pluck it away.
- Do therapy and find someone to challenge your opinion on it.
- I think ftmtf have alot of prior challenges but I also think mtftm are potentially more quiet.
- Hear us and be open.
I had fully transitioned with surgery and t and I was thinking about fem stuff, it took a surgery to force me to admit I wasn't happy. I had HUGE anxiety back peddling but I had tremendous relief when I did. If I was you I'd find someone to challenge your opinion about being trans, then I'd try therapy to talk about it, preferably one that won't force you either way, and lastly don't be afraid to try some things out.
I believe in you friend, I wish you good health and happiness.
This is slightly off topic to the post but I've been noticing that a lot of people seem to blame the medical industry for this stuff (I also had top surgery and greatly regret it) but I've always felt like the Trans movement was to blame because I feel like they bullied therapists "gatekeepers" out of their position. Or am I just terribly misinformed?
I'm doing great actually, for the first time in years my head is cleared. I don't like my scars but it's mostly because they have bumped up. 🤷♀️ Such is life, when I have time and money I'll work on hopefully fixing that but other than that I'm done fucking around with my body. I'll happily move back into tattoos and piercings 😂
If people want to feel strange about me that's fine, but I've also learned I'm not the center of people's attention in that sense. They aren't worried about me being a weirdo, I am. The only reason I think like that is because my confidence is in pieces and it's just saying "hey, u suck..you guyish-girl"
Maybe it's the same for you.
Hey there! Currently dating someone who was with me during transition and now during detransition. I have no chest but have been wearing a bra with prosthetics for people who have had them removed, I have no plan of telling his side of the family or anyone else who doesnt already know about it. Quite frankly for my theres no reason to, it wouldnt change anything and Im not interested in creating a awkward situation for myself. If they find out about it somehow I have no issue telling them. Everyone has a history, not everyone needs to know about yours.