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Reddit user /u/samwisefs's Detransition Story

Detransitioned: 25
female
took hormones
regrets transitioning
serious health complications
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a fake persona.

The comments display:

  • Personal, specific details: The user shares firsthand, medically specific experiences of detransition (e.g., vaginal atrophy, voice changes, timeline of 9 months off testosterone).
  • Consistent and nuanced views: The user expresses a complex, evolving perspective on gender ideology, which is common for people reflecting on a deeply personal detransition experience.
  • Appropriate emotional tone: The language shows passion, personal struggle, and empathy when responding to others, which aligns with the stated context of a genuine detransitioner.

About me

My journey started when I was 22, as I began taking testosterone because I felt I didn't fit the stereotypes of being a woman. I stopped nearly three years later, and after nine months off it, my body has mostly returned to its natural female state, which has been a huge relief. I now see that my discomfort wasn't with being female, but with the rigid expectations placed on women. I don't regret exploring my identity, but I deeply regret the medical intervention. I am now a gender nonconforming woman, learning to accept myself without needing to change my body.

My detransition story

My whole journey with gender has been long and complicated, and I'm still figuring a lot of it out. Looking back, I think a lot of my desire to transition came from a place of discomfort with the stereotypes and expectations placed on women. I believed I was transgender for a while and ended up taking testosterone for nearly three years. I started when I was 22 and stopped just before I turned 25. I'm 25 now and have been off T for about nine months.

During my time on testosterone, I experienced a lot of physical changes. Some I liked at the time, but others were really difficult. The vaginal atrophy was awful and made intimacy painful. Since stopping testosterone, my body has been changing back. The atrophy has almost completely reversed, which is a huge relief. The way I smell has gone back to being feminine, my skin is much softer, my libido and appetite are lower, and, wonderfully, I can cry again. I’ve been working on my voice, using some techniques from a MTF YouTuber, and with practice, I can speak in a slightly higher tone now. My period hasn't returned yet, and my body hair is the same but grows slower; I'm managing it with waxing and IPL treatments.

I don't regret exploring transition because it helped me understand myself better, but I do regret the medical intervention. I've come to realise that my feelings were less about being a man and more about being a woman who doesn't fit the mould. I now see myself as a gender nonconforming woman. I think the focus on gender identity, even for non-binary people, often relies too much on stereotypes about masculinity and femininity, which feels limiting. I wish we lived in a world where people could just be themselves, whether that's a feminine man or a masculine woman, without needing to explain themselves or change their bodies to be accepted.

I've been reading a lot from both sides of the debate—gender ideology and gender critical thinking. It's fascinating but also confusing. Part of me loves the idea that gender can be "whatever you want it to be," but another part is very troubled by the push for medical transition, especially for young people, because of my own experience. I read a book that suggested there might be similar biological roots for being a gay man or a trans woman, and that it's individual experiences and choices that lead people down different paths. That really made me think.

Ultimately, I believe adults should be free to make their own choices about their lives and bodies. But for me, transitioning medically was a mistake. I benefited from stopping hormones and allowing my body to return to its natural state. The best outcome would be a society that gets rid of rigid gender roles so that no one feels the pressure to medically transition just to be seen for who they are.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

Age Event
22 Started taking testosterone.
Almost 25 Stopped testosterone after nearly 3 years.
25 9 months off testosterone; experiencing reversal of many physical changes.

Top Comments by /u/samwisefs:

9 comments • Posting since May 2, 2021
Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) discusses her nuanced views on gender, supporting Kate Bornstein's concept of gender fluidity but expressing concern about youth transition, and cites "The End of Gender" on brain studies linking gay males and trans-women.
15 pointsMay 8, 2021
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Thanks for asking :) personally I enjoy Kate Bornstein’s View of gender being whatever the f*** you want it to be because ultimately we should all be able to live our lives and be happy, no matter how we identify. However in terms of supporting transition for young children et cetera I find it troubling because of my own journey and the transition. I wonder if more research in sex ology needs to be done to find out root causes. For example, the book I’m currently reading which is “the end of gender” talks about all scientific studies related to this field and shows very little difference in the brain development of gay males and trans-women, suggesting that both stem from the same lack of testosterone in the womb and it is simply the individuals experience and choices which lead them down either path. (not that this explains trans-women who are attracted to women only as their brains far more closely resemble those of cis-het men).

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) discusses her search for books exploring both gender ideology and gender critical perspectives after realizing she is not transgender.
15 pointsMay 8, 2021
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Since coming to the realisation that I am not transgender I have been trying to educate myself on both sides of the thought spectrum, eg Gender ideology versus gender critical thinking. Both sides I have found very interesting and have compelling arguments. I would be fascinated to hear what others have read and thoughts about these books and ideologies

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) discusses the conflict between supporting adult transition choices and rejecting gender stereotypes, identifying as a gender nonconforming woman.
12 pointsMay 8, 2021
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I’m struggling at the moment with what is best in terms of how society approaches gender transition. For example, I hate that trans-ideology and gender theory focus so much on stereotypes where is I would describe myself now as a gender nonconforming woman. However I do also feel that adult should be able to make their own choices and live lives how they feel comfortable. It’s a tricky one

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) explains the difference between gender ideology and gender critical thinking.
10 pointsMay 8, 2021
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Good question! So my understanding is that gender ideology refers to the current model of gender being a spectrum where people can identify inherently as non-binary, gender fluid and any number of other genders. Gender critical thinking is essentially the opposite, where people question whether gender ideology is based in fact or in wishful thinking. People who are gender critical typically question whether transition is the right thing for most people identifying as trans-and also may well question the existence of non-binary identities

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) details her positive physical and emotional changes 9 months after stopping testosterone.
9 pointsMay 26, 2021
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Congratulations! You did an amazing thing to admit this all and it sounds like it’s going so well.

I am currently almost 9 months off T after nearly 3 years on. (I’m 25, not sure if that changes anything)

I have noticed: ~ almost full reversal of vaginal atrophy ~ The way I smell has gone completely back to feminine ~ I have a lower libido and appetite ~ after some practice I am able to speak in a slightly higher tone than I did while on T ~ my skin is much softer ~ I can cry!

No period yet and so far my body hair is the same but grows in slower. I am working on a combination of waxing and IPL depending on the area (never both in same place) to see how much of a difference I can make :)

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) comments on how both pro-trans and trans-critical books reveal an over-reliance on binary stereotypes, even among non-binary people, to define gender identity.
7 pointsMay 8, 2021
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I completely agree! It has been really interesting to hear from both sides with these books. Some of the lines people used to describe how they know they are trans-and their gender identity is such a binary view of what it means to be a man or a woman that it’s kind of insane. I mean that even for non-binary identified people as they use the terms masculine and feminine constantly to describe their own gender identity

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) explains that it's never too late to detransition, affirms that men can be feminine, and encourages taking time to pause and figure things out.
6 pointsMay 26, 2021
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This sounds really hard so I’m sorry you’re going through it.

  1. You can ABSOLUTELY be male and feminine/girly
  2. It’s never too late to realise you are on the wrong path for you
  3. It’s okay to put things on pause and take time to figure things out 💚
Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) discusses the societal roots of gender transition, arguing that eliminating gender expectations would allow people to express themselves without needing medical intervention.
4 pointsMay 2, 2021
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I agree with lots people have put here. I think transition can be really beneficial for a select few people but ultimately the best thing for everyone would be to get rid of societal expectations on all people in relation to gender so even people who want to live as much aligning with our current stereotypes for the opposite sex would not need to explain themselves or undergo medical treatment to do so and be taken seriously

Reddit user samwisefs (detrans female) explains her experience with vaginal atrophy reversal and voice feminization after stopping testosterone.
3 pointsMay 27, 2021
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TMI warning ⚠️ The atrophy part is so important! It was so awful for me. I noticed quite quickly that I started to have the kind of fluid that had completely dried up during my time on T. It’s still stayed painful to touch the area for a while though, I think because the tissue needs time to repair slowly. I don’t think it’s fully healed yet but it’s honestly to the point where as long as I am relaxed, it does not hurt at all and if I am not relaxed that it is not too bad to accidentally touch, just uncomfortable. Just be patient with it :) So I haven’t done all that much in terms of exercises but I did do a little bit. There is a trans mtf youTuber (channel name is transvoicelessons) Who has a lot of videos about how to feminise your voice. I only listened to one in the end but it gave me enough information about the things to try to start speaking in a more feminine way. To be honest I haven’t needed to do anything else since, only keep practising those ideas which very quickly felt natural, possibly because I’m now speaking in a way are used to with a slightly lower register? ALSO (sorry to all my fellow feminists) I have found that if I speak with a smile, my tone naturally picks up a little bit and sounds more feminine 🤦🏻 Hope that helps :)