This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic actor.
The comments demonstrate:
- Emotional depth and variety: The user expresses anger, compassion, empathy, and support in different contexts, which is complex for a bot to replicate consistently.
- Personalized advice: The user offers specific, nuanced suggestions (e.g., lab work, prosthetics, gratitude lists) that are contextually appropriate for a detransitioning audience.
- Consistent ideology: The user maintains a consistent gender-critical feminist perspective while engaging with different aspects of the detransition experience.
- Natural language patterns: The writing includes colloquialisms, emotional emphasis, and varied sentence structure that reads as human.
The passion and anger present are consistent with a genuine detransitioner or desister who feels harmed by their experience.
About me
I was born female and my discomfort started with the changes of puberty, which I tried to escape by identifying as a man online. I pursued testosterone and top surgery, believing it was my only path to happiness, but it never fixed my underlying depression and anxiety. I now see a lot of my drive to transition came from internalized homophobia and a desire to avoid being a lesbian. I deeply regret the permanent changes to my body, especially losing my fertility and dealing with new health issues. I am now detransitioning and, with the help of a good therapist, learning to accept myself as the woman I am.
My detransition story
My journey into transition and out of it again was long and complicated. I was born female, and from a young age, I felt a deep discomfort with my body, especially when I started going through puberty. I hated developing breasts; it felt like a betrayal. I now believe this was a mix of puberty discomfort and body dysmorphia, made worse by my low self-esteem and depression. I spent a lot of time online, and I was heavily influenced by the communities I found there. They gave me a framework to understand my feelings as being "trans," and it felt like an escape from the pain I was in. I started identifying as non-binary first, which felt like a less scary step, but that quickly escalated to identifying as a trans man.
I pursued medical transition because I was convinced it was the only way to fix the deep unhappiness I felt. I took testosterone for several years. It changed my voice and my body shape, and I eventually got top surgery to remove my breasts. At the time, I thought it was what I needed to finally be happy and comfortable. But it wasn't a cure. The underlying issues—the depression, the anxiety, the feeling of not being right in my own skin—were still there. I just had a different set of problems to deal with.
Looking back, I can see how my internalised homophobia played a huge part. I was attracted to women, and the idea of being a lesbian felt wrong and uncomfortable to me. Being a "straight man" felt like a much safer, more acceptable identity. Transitioning felt like a way to escape the misogyny and homophobia I saw around me, but it was just escapism. It didn't solve anything; it just added a new layer of complexity to my life.
I don't regret my transition in the sense that it brought me to where I am now, which is a place of much greater self-understanding. But I deeply regret the permanent changes I made to my body. The testosterone and the surgery have left me infertile, and that is a profound loss that I grieve. I have serious health complications now that I have to manage, all because of the medical interventions I pursued. My body will never be what it was, and that is a hard reality to live with.
I benefited immensely from finding a non-affirming therapist, a woman who helped me work through the trauma and low self-esteem that led me to transition in the first place. She helped me see that my psychological problems required psychological solutions, not physical ones. I’ve had to learn to love and accept myself as the woman I am, even if my body is now scarred and changed.
My thoughts on gender now are that it is a social construct, not a medical one. I believe that much of what is sold as "gender identity" is really just a combination of personality, interests, and the discomfort that can come with puberty and societal pressures, especially for women who don't fit a narrow stereotype. For me, it was never about an innate sense of being male; it was about trying to solve deep-seated pain with a drastic physical change, and that doesn't work.
I am now detransitioning, living again as a woman. It’s a difficult road, dealing with the social anxiety and the stress of my body returning to a more natural state without testosterone. But I am trying to focus on self-love and acceptance. I am grateful for the support of other detransitioned women; we are all in this together, healing from the damage of a medical industry that failed us.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 13 | Started puberty; began to experience intense discomfort and hatred toward my developing breasts. |
| 16 | Spent increasing time online; heavily influenced by trans communities; began to identify as non-binary. |
| 17 | Socially transitioned to male; began using a new name and pronouns. |
| 18 | Started testosterone therapy. |
| 21 | Underwent top surgery (double mastectomy). |
| 24 | Realized transition had not resolved underlying mental health issues; began process of detransition. Stopped taking testosterone. |
| 25 | Began therapy with a non-affirming female therapist to address root causes of trauma and low self-esteem. Officially living again as a woman. |
Top Comments by /u/skankyferret:
I just want to say you are still lovely and precious just as you are right now, even if you feel like you've made horrible decisions. You're still a valuable woman and your body is worthy of tenderness and love. I'm deeply sorry that you were allowed to pursue such intensive treatments and procedures before you were old enough to make those decisions. I would go to a doctor and get some labs done (just to make sure there's no damage to your organs) and discuss what hormone treatments are right for you as you detransition. As for the emotional side of it, I would suggest finding a therapist. Ideally a woman. She can help you on your road back to self acceptance and self love. You're not in this alone. You're strong and you are going to make it through this. Maybe you can find some others detrans women to share your feelings and experiences with, like a support group! You could meet some amazing women to build friendships with!
If you don't want to be flat chested, I would maybe try some prosthetics (like what drag queens wear) or maybe consider breast implants if you ever Really Really want them back. Of course there's always the ole stuff a bra with toilet paper trick too if you're done with forking out money for expensive surgeries to the medical industry.
I'm proud of you for your strength and bravery. Things won't always feel like this. You're are capable of healing emotionally and physically. I wish all the best for you. Stay strong! Your value as a woman does not depend on your appearance. Even if people treat you differently sometimes, remind yourself that you are worthy of the utmost respect and love. Maybe begin setting goals (short and long term) so you can take pride on your accomplishments. Writing a gratitude list also helps me out of the dumps. Even if everything is in a dismal state, writing down every single little thing to be grateful for can make you feel more fortunate.
I really hope you find some strength and comfort so you can feel at home in your own body soon. I believe in you.
I can only imagine the psychological stress you're experiencing, but even with that burden, it sounds like you're doing great. I'm proud of you. I hope that your social anxiety lessens as your body returns to it's natural state. Remember that nothing is permanent, so dont torture yourself while you wait. Try to love and accept your body just as you are and watch as it slowly transforms again. You are a divine and lovable woman no matter what you look like. And you're never alone! You can message me if you want to talk to someone, and I'm sure a lot of others in here would feel the same 💜 we're all in this patriarchy together
You get that terf is a misogynistic slur though, right? And that there is nothing wrong with feminists prioritizing women's safety instead of men's feelings? Liberal feminists decided to make it the new "feminazi / d*ke" and use it against anyone who dissents. But that doesnt mean it's actually a bad thing.
That point aside, it's a lovely sentiment. Because youre right, ive havent seen anyone in this sub be hateful, vile, entitled, threaten violence, etc. I've found them instead to be open-minded, courageous, determined, and caring. This is a much less toxic culture than the transcult, for sure. The reason it gets a bad rap is because men get mad that we arent going along with the charade anymore.
You're so off. Like you genuinely have no idea what you're talking about. As as gender critical feminist, I'm happy to say that I study physics and astronomy. Many women whom I talk to about GC theory are also well educated and scientific minded.
This lie is purely misogynistic and cannot be supported by evidence.
Also radfems despise nazis/facists/racists/neo-nazis, and disagree with flat earthers and conservatives.
That sounds absolutely horrid. I am so sorry that transitioning destroyed your standard of living instead of improving it. Maybe you and some other detrans folk could band together and sue the drug companies for negligence or something. Because that is totally evil to give people medication that isn't necessary or beneficial. And the doctors broke the hippocratic oath too!
You can still be totally feminine presenting and be a man. There is no wrong way to be you. However, it sounds like you have some severe trauma to work through. Psychological problems often require psychological solutions. If something is hurting you deep down emotionally, physical solutions don't remedy the root cause of your pain. I would go to therapy and try to heal from the trauma and try to focus on self love. You don't need to change everything about yourself to be lovable and accepted. There is no wrong way to be you.