This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic detransitioner/desister.
The user shares highly specific, personal, and emotionally nuanced details about their transition, detransition, eating disorder, PTSD, and other life experiences. The writing style is consistent, passionate, and reflective of a real person grappling with complex issues. The account's long history (since 2017) and the defensive but detailed response to skepticism further support its authenticity.
About me
I was born female and had a very traumatic childhood, which led me to start testosterone at 17. I lived as a man for years and had top surgery, believing it was an escape from my pain. I stopped hormones at 23 and my body began to change back, which was a huge relief. I now realize my transition was rooted in trauma and a deep need for control. I am finally learning to accept myself and live comfortably as a masculine woman.
My detransition story
My name isn't important, but my story is. I’m a 24-year-old woman, and this is my journey through transitioning and detransitioning.
I was born female. My childhood was very difficult and isolated. I was an only child, and the adults in my life were either absent or abusive. My dad was in and out of my life, and my mom’s partners were not good men. The few women around were better, but they weren't there for long. I was groomed online as a kid, and when I was blamed for that, it made me incredibly suicidal. I felt completely alone.
I found the concept of being transgender when I was 17. It felt like an escape. I think a huge part of my desire to transition came from trauma. I had never had a safe male figure in my life, so I decided to become one. I wanted to be strong, mean, and tough—everything I felt a woman couldn't be. I wanted to be what I wasn't because I didn't want to be abused anymore. I now realize I was displacing my insecurity and my need for control over my life onto my body.
I started testosterone at 17. The changes were rapid, especially because I also gained a lot of weight around that time. My voice dropped, my face changed, and I started to look like a man. For a while, I was sure of it. I even got top surgery at 18. I was deep in an eating disorder at the time, and I hated my breasts. I thought removing them would fix something, but it didn't.
I lived as a man for about 6 or 7 years. It was a strange experience. For the first time, I had guy friends and saw how men act with each other when women aren't around. It was a real shock and an education, but it wasn't me. My mental health was a rollercoaster. I was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder, which was actually a combination of drug use and PTSD.
I stopped testosterone before I officially decided to detransition, around 23 years old. I stopped for my mental health. I was put on lithium for a misdiagnosis and gained about 30 pounds in three months. Ironically, that weight gain helped my body start to change back. Fat redistributed, my face softened, and my curls came back. The most notable change for me was my eyes. On T, they looked so serious and hard. Now, they look bright again.
It took about 8 months after stopping T to really see significant changes. It’s a slow process, but your body can change a lot. My temples are never coming back, and my hair isn't as thick as it was pre-T, but I’ve made peace with that. I’m doing tremendously better at 24 than I was at 19.
I’ve had to do a lot of thinking about gender. I realized that whether I look like a boy or a woman doesn't matter. I do not look like a grown man anymore, and I don’t get treated like one. The relief from that is amazing. I don’t have a desire to look hyper-feminine. I’m learning to be comfortable being a masculine woman. Women can have deep voices. Women can have small chests. Womanhood is not defined by anyone but yourself.
A big part of my healing was realizing that my eating disorder and my transition were both rooted in the same thing: I was never happy with how I looked because I didn't love myself. I needed to learn that I am deserving of love, regardless of my weight or how I look. I don't need to starve myself, and I don't need hormones. I need to accept myself.
I do have some regrets. I feel sad about the youth I lost. I missed out on my teens and early twenties being a woman. I also regret my top surgery. I have a lot of scar tissue, and I just dislike having this trans male, flat chest. I wear bras sometimes to feel like I have something there, but I’m thinking of stopping. It’s a permanent reminder of a choice I made for the wrong reasons.
If I could have been born a cisgender man, I think I would have preferred it, but I do not wish to be a trans man. I'd rather be a woman. I simply did not want to experience the emotional hardship of being seen as a third gender. It was too isolating.
My advice to anyone questioning is to take it slow. The best thing you can do is go off hormones and see how you feel, under a doctor's care, of course. Your body will amaze you. And ask yourself the hard questions about your past and your trauma. So much of what feels like dysphoria can be about control or displacing other pain.
Now, I’m growing old as a woman, and it feels beautiful. Life is better than it ever was. The start of this journey was the hardest part, but it does get easier. Most days, I don't even think about it anymore. I am finally, finally learning to be me.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 17 | Started testosterone. |
| 18 | Had top surgery. |
| 23 | Stopped testosterone. |
| 23 | Began identifying as detransitioned and living as a woman again. |
| 24 | Now, living comfortably as a detransitioned woman. |
Top Comments by /u/taukomii:
This guy is a red flag that you are lucky to have avoided. If he's like this hearing about your past, don't trust him with your future. There's a reason the divorce rate amongst women who develop chronic illness is so high compared to the divorce rate of men who develop chronic illness. Statistically, men don't stay when things get bad.
Girl, swear on god that you'd look like a woman without the wig. Your face is v soft in a good way. Double chins are often genetic. I'm in a normal BMI, and I have one. Nothing you can usually do abt it besides corrective procedures. You have very VERY nice hair. Hair that didn't see as horrible side effects of hairloss that most people get.
If you like the wig, wear it. But honestly, you'd do better without it and letting your hair grow out slow and naturally.
All very real and valid points, but if you're hopping from thinking you're transgender to now thinking there's no such thing as transgender kids at such a young age, I'd argue there's quite a lot of influence about your identity in your life.
Following echo chambers and sociopolitical talking points on a n y side this strongly to have opinions about in your teens while having not experienced a large fraction of life outside of highschool (and probably at home for an important developmental portion of it due to the pandemic) is very commonly a red flag I see in so many youths. It was even myself when I was a teen. I went from an "SJW" to watching ben shaprio then to being a weird inbetween centrist/capitalist.
My political opinions in my mid-20s have drastically changed for what I would consider better simply because of life lived. Not to say you haven't had a hard life or don't have more "maturity" than kids your age... but a teen is still a kid.
I see no difference between a chronically online transgender it/they tiktok teen and an "informed" facts dont care about feelings political debate teen.
I'm very glad you realized before many others that you don't wish to transition. It's fantastic to save yourself from the hardship. I wish I did. But in today's current political climate, I think the hard black and white stances on this are both causing people who aren't trans to transition and people who are not to.
Thank you for the detailed message! I'm 5'3, so my height isn't much of an issue. Unfortunately I did get top surgery at 18, but I've gotten quite a few bras that make me look like I have something! (Tho not much) Which is enough for me.
I have swollen masseter muscles due to bruxism which is probably where my concern lies. This made my day! Ty again!
It is far too often women find themselves with men who do not love them it does not matter if they look like margo robbie or Melissa Mcarthy. Both are beautiful women, but no doubt some man will say Margo needs to gain weight and Melissa needs to lose it.
Don't listen to a man's opinion. Value yourself far more than you do.
I really can't believe the picture on the right is me either. It's crazy how manly I looked, and I was so sure I'd never look remotely feminine again. But here we are!
I also think what made the biggest difference was unintented weight gain around the same time I stopped T. I had gone on lithium and gained like 30 pounds in 3 months, and with it I think helped the fat redistribute in a weird way?? Im no scientist, but it's similar to what happened when I first went on T. I gained a lot of weight and saw rapid changes cause of it.
I hope you're well too!! It's a journey 😪
I dont think subreddits are a good judge. R/detrans is the only real community resource for us and we come here forba purpose. And not everyone is detrans, may be desisted or questioning or just a decent trans/ally trying to get a view on both sides.
The trans subreddit is literally mostly memes and nothing serious and its probably a mix of all lgbt+ people. Not to mention possible chasers who join or people who just join to steal memes and make jokes on another platform.
Reddit numbers are not scientific
If I could have been born a cisgender man, I would have preferred it. I do not wish to be a trans man though. I'd rather be a woman, and it's not because I'm transphobic in any sense of the way. I simply just do not want to have to experience the emotional hardship of being a third gender.
Detrans after ~6 or 7 years for me. Alessio was 8 I think? Shes detrans on tiktok. Then uhmmm el I believe her name was transitioned for awhile too. I'm amazed that people really allowed a child to go through plastic surgery. Hysto at 20 I get as it's recommended due to atrophy.... but wow.
Your case would be very different from most of ours unfortunately. We all probably went through a regular female puberty. I did transition at 17 though, and I do... feel sad sometimes that I missed out on my teens and early twenties being a woman. In some ways tho, I'm happy I got to experience how men act to other men. I never had guy friends before that, and I now realize why. It's a shock for sure.
I digress, everyone medically transitioned here all have different experiences. Some are great. I think mine is rather fantastic albiet still rather disheartening for myself. We're all our worst critics though.
This photo was from when I was 21. I picked the photo that I was most Masc and clearly very hard under an eating disorder because I am PROUD of where I am now. I was not pre-t 14 days ago????? It doesn't say that anywhere on my profile. I still support trans people so I'm in trans subreddits because the human experience is very different. And it also??? Doesnt say im 36 with covid two years ago??? I was 22 with covid 2 years ago????????? Yes I was diagnosed bipolar, but it was a misdiagnosis of drug use and ptsd. I drew the art. This profile is me. This photo is me. Everything on this profile is me. I've had this account since 2017.
Edit: I realize and understand that in a detrans subreddit it's ok to be on the defense. I understand. This is really me. Thank you for saying I look younger! I feel younger! And happier! It's honestly amazing. I also stopped T before I decided to detransition for my mental health. So that's why I was still going by he/him about 8-6 months ago.