I question if they're benefitting from misogyny, because it seems like they're rotting from the inside out from it. You're obviously a girl, for what, having some femininity? So being masculine and insecure makes them true male-brained FTMs? Those internalized misogynistic beliefs might explain why there's two of them. I'm really sorry you have to deal with that.

I completely agree people like this need to be humbled a bit, though it's likely the awkward silence spoke for itself. Strangers definitely get quieter when I give them a (genuine) baffled look and scrunch up my face and say  "Huh?" or "I don't care" to the pronoun question (I am very gnc). Even when I was enthusiastic and involved in trans thought I considered questions and comments like that inappropriate. These people likely will never refer to me in third person, and our interaction will be so brief none of it will matter. Some people don't seem to get that not everyone wants to explain their existence to a stranger.

I looked through your post history as suggested, I don't know if you're asking for advice but if you are, my honest opinion is stay way far away from /lgbt/ and adjacent spaces and seek help for your obsessive thoughts. Neither transition or detransition is going to change the problems you have or the people you're surrounding yourself with.

A lot of the stuff I was calling internalized transphobia (and people around me would say was) was actually better described as internalized misogyny. Not sure how it is for you, but for me it was centered around hating my female traits, physical and social. Growing up female you are often ridiculed a lot for not only your natural/physical qualities, but also your socialization. Down to the way you speak, hold yourself, your interests. Since I was a young child I thought my high voice was ugly and I wanted to do anything to get rid of it, and while it took me several years I'm now at peace with it. My brother would bully me a lot for having a high pitched and excited voice. When I was a kid it seemed normal for even adult men to make fun of little girls. So at a young age I developed a complex about this and how being "girly" was gross. This is just one example of how misogyny fueled my dysphoria, in an ocean of examples. Yes, my thoughts where I ridiculed myself for doing anything female-associated and would use it to question my trans status or "validity" did mean I didn't feel favorably about being transgender, but at it's root it was because somewhere down the line I developed a deep resentment for females and femininity due to my mistreatment, so of course I inescapably hated myself.

I cant diagnose you obviously but you seem very obsessive about your appearance and post a lot on reddit seeking some sort of response. Therapy can help, but posting yourself online will never help in a way that's meaningful. Maybe look up feedback loops in OCD and see if that seems familiar to you?

I hear you. I'm sorry you don't have support from or a stable connection with your siblings, we can relate on that front. Hopefully a time will come when your middle sibling is less self-absorbed about being "real" and more respectful of you. Convincing himself he's special and real when all three of you are / have been trans must seriously be a Herculean mental task. Probably keeps him up at night. It would've for me.

I'm masculine and there's a point where I was very male-focused and insecure although deep down I was never delusional enough to convince myself I was not deeply affected by misogyny. Not sure if this is a popular opinion here but I honestly dislike transmedicalists more than the people they oppose. They often run off of insecurity and sexism like in the case of your brother, and its ideology that tells detrans people they were "never even trans" and encourages young trans people to rush transition out of fear of being shunned by their transmedicalist peers, even if claimed otherwise. The beliefs themselves feel antithetical to many detransitioner's lived experiences. More often than not delivered in a very aggressive and toxic manner. I held mild/medium transmedicalist beliefs when I was younger and now as an adult a lot of it seems like hogwash to me. It made me wallow in dysphoria and self-hatred, and made me into my own expression and thought police. OCD fly trap.

You might find https://notputtingonashirt.org/ an interesting site. Even women with breast cancer have problems with doctors just choosing not to make their chest fully flat to their wishes like some doctors do to women seeking reductions, and that's only communicated AFTER they wake up from surgery. SMH.

I feel really sorry for you. Your view of female people and their bodies is very negative and mentally ill. Brute strength is not the only kind of physical strength, and not having as much physical strength for fighting or lifting as males doesn't mean females are pathetic or inferior. I recommend you not post in 4chan trans subreddits for your health, you will be surrounded by people who have a very skewed perception of what a woman is.

I agree that females are dealt a harder hand when it comes to puberty, socially and physically. I personally felt a lot of turmoil at the fact that my body can carry a child, and that when it comes to sex, men mostly talk about vaginas. I felt so much grief about these things because I was being abused, sexually, socially, and emotionally by boys and men in my life. It felt humiliating to have a vagina because the idea of penetration by a man felt humiliating, because I was so traumatized by sexual harassment and abuse by them. I don't know if you have a history of sexual abuse but for me it definitely manifested in dysphoria and dysmorphia. I did not even want to say the word vagina or ever refer to my own because it made me feel humiliated. If you relate to this at all, it would be something best addressed through trauma therapy. I could talk more on how I came to terms/am coming to terms with this but it would be a long post.

There are lots of reasons someone might dislike being called a woman or their birthname, how come that makes someone transgender? I had and still somewhat have these feelings too. I don't go by my birthname, I associate it with childhood abuse and it's quite feminine so I never connected with it much. Nowadays I'm much less averse to being referred to as a woman because I realized that I was seeing women as less complete and complex people than men. I was also tired of being treated like women are, so being trans felt like a safety blanket where I could escape that, even if it was delusional and people still saw me as a woman.

Tbh I also began to feel like the concept of being "true trans"/born in the wrong body/meant to be a man was a kinda ridiculous and narrow way of thinking and couldn't justify it to myself anymore after over 8 years of fully being into it. No matter how I've felt or feel about my body, even if I transition (which I doubt I will anymore), I'd still be a GNC woman deep down because I'm a female. And that's not a bad thing, it's a dose of reality that brought me a lot of peace. I haven't changed much since being "fully" trans in a lot of ways aside for that I am at war at my body and my internal logic much less. I have big boobs but wouldn't mind a flat chest. None of that makes me a man though, nor does enjoying masculine language and a masculine name make me a man. In the end it just makes me a woman who prefers those things.

Yes, particularly hanging around trans people gave me a lot of dysphoria as the spaces trend towards negative and toxic about their own bodies, and indirectly enforce negative gender roles on females. My more violent dysphoria lessened over time, especially as I escaped from trans spaces, but I still get the occasional short lived spike of it, even if I don't really identify as a man anymore. 

Existing as masculine person by itself, which I have finally almost fully separated from being male (I have internal black and white thinking, unfortunately validated by the trans community, that drove my dysphoria and made my body feel unliveable and unbearable), does not provoke any dysphoria in me and makes me feel normal and I no longer pick my mind apart by way of OCD. IE how I dress and my name and such. 

The cognitive dissonance caused by contradictions and sexism in mainstream trans thought, feeling (or perhaps knowing) I would never be an actual male, inter-community discourse that I could no longer pretend to agree with, provoked a lot of dysphoria and internal confusion, but it thankfully eased up with a slow, steady progression of acceptance of my body and reality. My rule is, I don't rush or force anything, I do not feed my OCD monster (going great!), and I find my mind slowly changes anyways. That's not to say it didn't feel like my entire world was being uprooted at the start. I think I have some "natural" dysphoria and I am largely socially GNC but I unfortunately found the trans community escalated mine into full blown, life consuming mental illness and played on my worst insecurities and fears.