This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's narrative is highly personal, nuanced, and emotionally consistent with a desister's experience (someone who stopped identifying as trans without medical intervention). The comments detail a specific philosophical and feminist-driven journey, express internal conflict, shame, and complex family dynamics, and mention relatable resources—all hallmarks of a genuine human experience, not a scripted bot. The passion and anger are contextually appropriate for the subject matter.
About me
I'm a woman who started to believe I was trans because I felt a deep discomfort with my body and associated being female with weakness. My feelings were actually rooted in internalized misogyny and trauma from my sister's puberty, not in being born the wrong sex. I'm grateful I never medically transitioned, and with the right therapy, I worked through those issues. I now understand that I can be a strong, butch woman and that my body discomfort was a normal response to societal pressures. While it's still hard to fully accept, I am relearning to live comfortably as myself.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender was confusing and, looking back, rooted in a lot of things that weren't really about being born in the wrong body. For years, I was completely convinced I had severe gender dysphoria and was fully on my path to transition. I'm a woman, and I felt a deep discomfort with my body, especially during puberty. I hated my breasts and felt incredibly awkward and wrong in my own skin. I associated being a woman with being weak, and I wanted no part of that.
A lot of my feelings stemmed from internalized misogyny. Society had fed me this idea that female words were weaker, and I didn't want to be seen that way. I also didn't recognize that I had experienced trauma from my older sister when she was going through puberty; my therapist later helped me understand that my own puberty became scary because her experience was my only example. What I thought was dysphoria was actually a trauma response.
My parents sent me to therapy when I first came out as trans, but they did it for all the wrong reasons. They accused me of being severely mentally ill and wanted to "fix" me to be cis. That wasn't helpful at all and just made me defensive. It wasn't that therapy that changed me. What really helped was a different therapist later on, who helped me work through my trauma, and my own exploration of gender theory and feminism. I started to realize that it's a completely normal cis female experience to feel weird about your body because of objectification and misogyny.
I came to the realization around May of this year that I am, in fact, a woman. It's been a process of reidentification for me. I never medically transitioned, which I'm grateful for now. I still sometimes get uncomfortable at the thought of being a woman, but I now know where those thoughts come from, and it's not gender dysphoria. I'm trying to reinforce to myself and others that I go by "she," even when it feels uncomfortable, because I am the possibility of a woman. I can be strong and butch and still a woman. It's a hard concept to internalize after fighting against it for so long.
I have a lot of shame around telling my parents. I'm afraid of proving them "right" and having them gloat with "I told you so." I might never tell them that I'm cis; it feels like something I could take to my grave.
I don't regret exploring my gender, but I do regret how sure I was and how I almost made permanent changes. I don't think my experience is true for everyone; I believe some people's dysphoria is not curable. But for me, it was something that could be worked through with the right support and understanding. A loving fiancée also helped immensely. Simple things, like finding a well-fitting bra, made a huge difference in how comfortable I felt with my body and greatly diminished those feelings I called dysphoria.
| Age | Date | Event |
|---|---|---|
| (Exact age not provided) | (Earlier years) | Experienced trauma from older sister's puberty, making my own puberty scary. |
| (Exact age not provided) | (Before 2019) | Came out as trans, parents sent me to unhelpful therapy. |
| (Exact age not provided) | May 2019 | Came to the realization that I am a cis woman, began reidentifying. |
| (Exact age not provided) | Mid-2019 | Underwent helpful therapy that addressed trauma, leading to understanding my feelings as a trauma response, not dysphoria. |
Top Comments by /u/tekenimeow:
I definitely don’t think all trans people act like this, I’m sorry for implying that if I did. I actually tend to hang around, errr, “truscum” areas of the Internet because those trans (and cis) ppl have similar philosophy of gender as I do.
I just hope those who think the way that I described come to their senses or whatever.... I hope they do eventually stop being so hateful.
I actually had quite the opposite experience, oddly. I didn’t recognize the trauma that I had been through until my most recent therapist. My trauma was mostly caused by my older sister when she was entering puberty, and my therapist said something like “that mist have made your own puberty very scary, because you only had this one example of why going through puberty was like.” And it was eye opening about my “dysphoria” which is actually a trauma response. This therapist actually helped me realize I’m not trans (not through any conversion techniques but just through making me think). There are some good ones out there!
I’m wondering the same thing, myself. My parents sent me to therapy to fix me when I came out as trans, they accused me of being severely mentally ill etc. And now, years later, I’m afraid of proving them “right” and reinforcing their ideas that trans people can just be “fixed” to be cis or whatever.
I don’t want to talk to them about it. I don’t want to see their judgmental and/or self-righteous stares. They were wrong to send me to therapy like that. It’s not therapy that changed my views of myself, but gender theory and a different philosophy and bit of feminism.
It just feels so shameful to have to address my parents about this. It feels like they’ll just gloat like “I told you so” and that always feels awful. I feel like I might just take this to my grave, like maybe I’ll never be able to tell them that I’m cis.
I’m skeptical.
I do know that I had severe gender dysphoria for years, was fully on my way to transitioning, but as a side effect to lots of therapy and medication and a loving fiancée, my dysphoria is cured. Therefore it is possible for at least some people; I don’t think I’d put my experiences as true for everyone though. (That is, maybe some people’s dysphoria is not curable)
I relate to your posts so much, op. I’m older, but I’m going through very similar things (I guess we all are here). Anyway, my advice is to not try to force yourself to be feminine or masculine, just do you and say “fuck it” to the people who say that whatever you’re doing invalidates you’re gender status.
And as someone who’s been reidentified for about three months, I still have doubts sometimes. I still get uncomfortable at the thought of being a woman. But I know now where those thoughts stem from, and it’s not gender dysphoria.
(Also check out r/abrathatfits !! Well fitting bras made me feel sooo much more comfortable about my boobage—greatly diminishing that dysphoria)
Also desisted or reidentified or whatever/never medically transitioned.
I think it was May of this year that I came to the réalisation that it is absolutely a cis female experience to feel weird about/in/with your body (because of objectification and misogyny) and also that I have a lot of internalized misogyny about not wanting to be seen as weak. And I associated female-words as being weaker.
I’m still working on all this mishmash of bullshit fed to me by society. I try to reinforce to the people who care that I go by “she” (even if it makes me uncomfortable) because I am the possibility of a woman. I tell that to myself, too, “woman” like YES you can be strong and butch and also a WOMAN.
It’s hard even conceptually. I can’t imagine how hard it is for those of you who did medically transition.