This story is from the comments by /u/warpdusted that are listed below, summarised with AI.
User Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the extensive comment history provided, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic actor.
The comments display a highly consistent, nuanced, and emotionally raw narrative of a female detransitioner's experience. The user details a specific personal journey (FtMtF), including:
- Specific medical details (Nebido injections, 14-week intervals, seeking T-blockers).
- A coherent timeline of emotional turmoil, from a breakup and family reactions to the physical and psychological process of stopping testosterone.
- Deeply personal reflections on trauma, sexuality (realizing she is a lesbian), and the complex social fallout from detransitioning.
- A wide range of emotions consistent with the trauma of detransition: grief, anger, numbness, hope, and defensiveness.
The account shows no signs of scripted or repetitive talking points. Instead, it demonstrates a person grappling with a profound and life-altering experience in real-time, offering support to others from a place of shared pain. The passion and occasional anger are consistent with someone who feels genuinely harmed and stigmatized.
About me
I started identifying as trans masculine at 19, believing it was my only escape from depression and trauma. I was on testosterone for a year and a half and initially loved the confidence it gave me, but trauma therapy helped me realize my dysphoria was a reaction to being mistreated as a female. I decided to detransition, a choice that cost me my relationship and my entire friend group. I’m now learning to embrace being a woman and a lesbian, finding a peace I never had before. I regret the permanent changes but have found strength in finally understanding myself.
My detransition story
My journey into and out of transition was one of the most painful and confusing experiences of my life. I started identifying as trans masculine around the age of 19. I was deeply uncomfortable with myself, struggling with depression, anxiety, and a lot of unresolved trauma from childhood sexual abuse. I also suspect I'm autistic, though a doctor dismissed those concerns when I was 15, telling me I was just a "hormonal teenage girl." I didn't fit in with other girls growing up, and I was in deep denial about being a lesbian. I came from a conservative, homophobic family, and I was terrified of growing up and being a woman in a world that often hates women.
I thought transitioning was my only way out. The narrative I saw everywhere was that if you had dysphoria, you transitioned or you died. It felt like a lifeline. I socially transitioned for about four years before starting testosterone. I was on Nebido, a long-lasting testosterone injection, for about a year and a half. During the first year, things felt good. I started passing as male, the constant fear I felt walking alone at night disappeared, and the pressure to be desirable to men lifted. I felt stronger and more confident.
But then, around the time I completed a round of trauma therapy, my memories of childhood abuse surfaced, and everything began to unravel. The certainty I had about being a man started to evaporate. I realized that a lot of my dysphoria wasn't inherent to me but was a reaction to how I was treated as a female and the trauma I had endured. I had pinned all my hopes on testosterone fixing my life, but it didn't address the real problems.
The breaking point came during the lockdown. I was alone with my thoughts, and I had a moment of stark clarity. I was lying on my apartment floor for days, suicidal, wrestling with the decision to detransition. I finally admitted to myself that I wasn't a man; I was a woman who had tried to escape herself. Telling my family was dramatic—I cried to my mom that I wasn't a man and was actually a lesbian, and I info-dumped my childhood trauma on her. They were surprisingly supportive, though my dad said I just needed therapy and that it was "all in my head."
The hardest part was losing people. My boyfriend, who is a trans man, broke up with me because he said if I wasn't trans masc, we couldn't be together. I lost almost my entire friend group, which consisted mostly of trans people. I was told I was having a psychotic break or that I was betraying the trans community. The silence from the gender clinic when I said I wanted to detransition was deafening.
I stopped testosterone immediately, even though I had just gotten my three-month shot. I started taking a testosterone blocker to help with the process. Coming off T was brutal. My emotions were all over the place, my energy crashed, and I had to face the permanent changes testosterone had made: my voice dropped, I had some bottom growth, and my body shape changed. I was terrified that I had ruined my body and that no woman would ever be attracted to me again as a deep-voiced, masculine-looking lesbian.
But slowly, things started to get better. My body began to change back. My face softened, my hairline started to recover, and my emotions, while intense, felt more authentic. I started to reconnect with my femaleness in a way I never had before. I began to see that my power came from embracing being a soft woman in a hard world, not from trying to be a man.
I regret transitioning because it wasn't what I needed. It was a maladaptive way to cope with trauma, internalized homophobia, and misogyny. I wish I had received proper psychological care that explored the roots of my dysphoria instead of being affirmatively pushed onto hormones. I don't regret the person I became through the experience—it made me stronger—but I regret the unnecessary physical changes and the time I lost.
I don't think medical transition is wrong for everyone, but I believe the current system is broken. There needs to be better gatekeeping, more exploration of underlying issues like trauma or autism, and less blind affirmation. I support everyone's right to live as they choose, but my choice was to return to living as a woman, and that has brought me a peace I never found as a man.
Here is a timeline of my transition and detransition events:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 15 | Suspected I had ASD; dismissed by doctor as "hormonal teenage girl" |
| 18-19 | Began identifying as trans masculine / FTM |
| 23 | Started testosterone (Nebido injections) |
| 24 | Completed trauma therapy; memories of childhood sexual abuse surfaced; began doubting my transition |
| 25 | Decided to detransition (July 2020); stopped testosterone and started blockers; came out to family as a detransitioned lesbian |
| 25 | Lost my boyfriend and most of my friend group due to detransition |
Top Reddit Comments by /u/warpdusted:
It’s illegal to be female and have a female body. You got curves girl that’s oversexualising, you too skinny girl you encouraging the anorexics, you too fat well you’re encouraging people to be unhealthy.
Weird how these discussions always gravitate around female bodies and no one’s ever happy. Women look like all kinds of things, I’m tired of how political it feels to just exist in a female body.
You’re good, we’re good. Our bodies are good.
We’ve already been branded a hate sub. People are still trying to get this sub banned. I’ve seen some pretty cruel things said in GC spaces but not everyone in them is staunchly anti-trans or bigoted. It’s mostly just women concerned about the effect the trans narrative is having on women and discussing the often brushed aside problems surrounding transition, like the numerous male sex offenders that identify as trans women, the problems that come with said people wanting to be in women’s prisons, pressure on lesbians to sleep with trans women, trans women in sports, the detransition rate among young women who were suffering from internalised misogyny, homophobia, trauma, ASD or personality disorders.
Those things are important to talk about, doesn’t make me anti-trans to do so, there are plenty of trans people that are also talking fairly about these things like Rose of Dawn and Blaire White. I’m not as conservative as either of them, but it’s important to listen to what all trans people have to say. It makes me deeply upset that these trans people are being ignored because they’re going against the narrative. There should be bridges between the trans and detrans community as we have overlapping experiences and needs, but it often feels like the majority of trans people (at least on reddit) just want us to disappear.
I hear you and I relate, I don’t have any answers for your feelings but I can share that mine are complicated too, not just about TwoX but about trans politics and censorship in general.
Like, we are becoming increasingly censored all the time, not just about stuff that pertains to this sub, but all kinds of things. I wish it were just a Reddit problem, but I’m seeing it all over social media; this increasingly scary idea of “agree with me or else” no discussion, no conversation.
I find that intellectually frightening. When we’re not able to have open and free dialogue with each other we stagnate, our ideas and our mindset stagnates. Censorship is no good thing for the human mind, all it does is make us stupid and too immature to handle disagreement. In my opinion, allegedly, for entertainment purposes only, don’t sue me.
And as for TwoX, if a sub with a name like that is nothing but trans pictures then I don’t know what to say other than how much more patent does the cognitive dissonance need to be?
I think context is important here. I can understand how trans people could see this as horrifying, BUT we’re talking about how transition was for us the people it doesn’t work for. Who it was wrong for. Sometimes I think of it as another fucked up thing that happened because my brain is weird (and idk I have really terrible personal boundaries I guess). The comparison can make a bit of sense, I hope?
I know trans people who are super happy or comfortable in their transition and that’s valid too, it’s not like that for them!
Lol but for me I feel I did this and for what? Like I’ve been asleep behind my own eyes, I don’t think people really understand how harrowing the darkest parts of the detrans experience can be, not even all detrans folk go there. We all have different stories and points of view and different struggles.
Transition is a BIG DEAL I think sometimes we love to go from A to B when it comes to trans things, IRL it’s not like that, it’s this gradual thing the overlap is a strange feeling that never quite goes away. Even now it doesn’t go away for me I might always be a little different from other women, I hope that’s okay with the world.
We’re all just asking for permission to exist and we’re existing anyway, what’s the deal?
Influencer culture is so fake. When I feel a little more comfortable in my detrans I’m going to start posting about what my life was actually like on the ground as a trans person.
YouTube, insta, and tiktok would honestly have people thinking that being trans is so glamorous. All these gorgeous people talking about their gender journey or whatever, getting jacked up to look like the perfect guy, having bones shaved to look like the perfect woman. Spending so much time, so much money to create this image of a thing. Talking about how happy they are now.
Have we completely tuned out of reality to look at what’s actually happening here? I sure had. Reality is being trans sucks, and the trans community is a terrifying place to be. You’re never safe, you’re never trans enough, and you’re never comfortable in your own skin.
It’s completely coconuts to be honest, unless you’ve been through a medical transition personally well... most people have no idea how intense and brutal the process can be. It’s not that I don’t support trans people, I do! There are many trans people in my life that I love and care deeply for, but the glamourising of transition in conjunction with doctors apparently unwilling or unable to challenge anyone about their believed transness... it’s not good.
You know it sucks enough that this happened to me and all the folks here, but it breaks my heart that I’m writing this right now but it won’t change the girls years in the future who will start T and regret it, because in a lot of ways no one wants to hear about the mistakes. No one wants to think they could be one.
It often feels as though this side of the story is deliberately disavowed, denied, and disowned. Unfortunately the fact of the matter is that this will continue to get worse until something is done about it, I’m hoping we can do that sooner rather than failing an entire generation of young people by telling them that girls can become boys and boys can become girls like it’s magic.
I feel this as a detrans woman. I also support people doing whatever they want with their bodies and having whatever opinions they want to have, it doesn’t seem that the same is returned to me though. I’ve been entirely ousted from my friends and some family for expressing my feelings around my detransition. Specifically that in my experience the social isolation, slurs used against me, and gaslighting I received is comparable to how a religious group may go after a heretic. I find it very interesting that trans people consider detranstioners such a threat that even this sub is constantly brigaded and censored.
I believe in a god, I’m not threatened by people who don’t, you know? I don’t run around deplatforming atheists, what other’s believe doesn’t change my beliefs. Diversity is what makes us human.
People continue to tell me my experience and my transness was/is “all in my head” and several acted as though I was having a mental breakdown when I realised that I’m female and not when I thought I was a man in a woman body. Things are completely backwards. Sorry for venting at you in return I just feel it so much today, I’m sad, stay strong.
I’m 9 days into detrans and I nearly hit the wall thinking this place was gone. I saw some of the comments people were making on /gendercyn and wow they really hate us... like if trans people have a right to exist so do I, if gender is fluid I have every right to change my mind.
Why are they so scared “TERFs” will use my experience against them? I’m not worried about trans people’s experiences invalidating mine, I know who I am.
Word. The “who’s really trans” narrative is exhausting like just watching the trans community squabble about it just makes me think that trans people kinda hate each other and themselves, but they hate us the most. Probably cause we’re more trans than them since we did it twice.
Desist: someone who identified as trans (potentially socially transitioned) but never underwent a medical transition and decided to re-identify with their birth sex would be described as someone who has “desisted”
Destransition: someone who identified as trans and medically transitioned (with cross sex hormones and/or surgery) and then decided to re-identify with their birth sex and potentially stop medically transitioning would be described as someone who has “detransitioned”
They’re sister terms and there’s sometimes overlap in how people will use them. Anyone else can feel free to correct or add information, I don’t know everything.