low self-esteem Detransition Stories & Timelines
Browse through 1462 unique detransition stories and timelines of people who haved shared their experiences in the /r/detrans subreddit, which is the largest open collection of detransition stories and experiences on the internet!
These stories have been summarised with the help of AI.
/u/furbysaysburnthings
I started transitioning to male at 25 to escape feeling like a failed woman and the pain from my past. I was on testosterone for over seven years, but I eventually realized I was using it as a coping mechanism, not because I was truly a man. Moving away from my affirming social circle gave me the perspective to see I was living a lie and dissociating from myself. I've been detransitioning for a year now, working to reverse the physical changes, which is difficult and scary. I now accept that I am female and am trying to build an identity for myself outside of gender entirely.
/u/portaux
I always felt different from other girls and wanted to be treated with respect, which led me to believe I was a boy. I became deeply depressed and nearly took testosterone, convinced it was my only escape from misogyny. After years of questioning, I realized I didn't want to be a man; I just hated the sexist stereotypes forced on women. I never medically transitioned, and I now see myself as a masculine woman who loves herself as she is. My journey taught me that you don't need to change your body to be your authentic self.
/u/cagedbunny83
I was a sensitive boy who felt different and dreaded becoming a man, so I transitioned to female as a teenager. I lived as a woman for a few years but was exhausted by the constant fear of being seen as a fraud. I detransitioned at 19 by simply deciding to see myself as a feminine man, and a huge weight was immediately lifted. I realized my problem wasn't being male, but the pressure to be masculine, and I now live happily as an effeminate gay man. I express myself freely in a way that feels right for me, knowing that my style has nothing to do with my sex.
/u/UniquelyDefined
I started identifying as non-binary at 25, thinking it was the answer to my deep discomfort and depression. I was convinced to try hormones, but just one month of estrogen caused permanent, painful breast growth and other changes. I realized I had made a terrible mistake based on internal issues, not because I was born the wrong sex. Now, I’m focused on healing and have learned my problems were from trauma and other conditions, not my body. I’m waiting for surgery to fix the damage and am finally learning to just be myself.
/u/spamcentral
I was a tomboy from the start and felt punished when puberty hit and my body changed. After years of being misgendered, I identified as non-binary, but that just left me feeling isolated and confused. Losing a lot of weight helped me see my natural masculine frame, and I realized my real issues were trauma and society's narrow expectations for women. I stopped identifying as non-binary and now accept myself as a gender non-conforming woman in a happy relationship. My journey taught me that true peace comes from healing the root causes of pain, not from changing your body.
/u/Luck_Unlucky
I felt like a boy trapped in a girl's body from the time I was a toddler, a feeling that intensified with trauma I experienced. I socially transitioned to live as a man in my 40s and for a while, it felt like the answer. I eventually realized my desire to be male was a coping mechanism tied to my past and internalized shame about being female. Through therapy, I learned to accept my body and understand that my masculine interests don't make me less of a woman. I'm now at peace, living as a masculine woman, and finally free from the depression that haunted me for decades.
/u/cranberry_snacks
I'm a man who, from a very young age, overwhelmingly identified with women and felt a deep disconnect from my own body. I nearly started hormone therapy because I believed becoming a woman was the only way to be happy. But I stopped because I felt changing my body was just an escape from a deeper lack of self-love. Through years of therapy and self-reflection, I realized my "female self" was a part of me I needed to accept, not become. Now I'm at peace, learning to love myself as a man with a female sense of self, and my dysphoria has faded.
/u/novaskyd
I started identifying as a trans man in my late teens because I was a lonely, anxious kid who didn't fit in with other girls. I lived as a man for four years and even got a prescription for testosterone, but using the gel never felt right and made me hesitate. What really changed things was realizing I could still enjoy feminine things and that there's no single way to be a woman. Now, I'm comfortable living as a female; I'm married with kids and see my body for what it can do, not just how it looks. Looking back, I believe my anxiety and social pressures played a big role, and I'm grateful I found my way through it without medical intervention.
/u/Sorry-not-Sorry-666
From a very young age, I felt a deep discomfort with being a girl and desperately wished I was a boy. I thought transitioning was the answer, but I realized it was just an aesthetic change that couldn't actually make me male. I discovered my dysphoria was really rooted in internalized sexism and a rejection of sexist gender roles forced on me. Now, I am at peace as a masculine woman, having learned to accept my female body. My main regret is the years I spent hating myself because of a harmful ideology.
/u/wetfart41968
I started wanting to transition after learning about it online as a kid, feeling like a complete alien around other girls. My journey was driven by trauma, strict gender roles, and a deep desire to escape being female after an assault. I took testosterone for over two years and lived as a man, but it didn't fix my anxiety or self-esteem. I stopped because I realized I needed to address my root issues in therapy, not change my body. Now I'm learning to accept myself as a woman with a unique history, even with the permanent changes from testosterone.
/u/wispo-wills
I started identifying as male at 16 after discovering the concept online, and I was quickly prescribed testosterone. I lived as a guy for a year and a half, but it felt like an exhausting performance that left me isolated. I realized my real issue was internalized misogyny and a deep discomfort with feminine stereotypes, not a need to be male. I stopped hormones at 19 and began the difficult process of accepting my female body, which was permanently changed by testosterone. Now, at 26, I have found peace by rejecting rigid gender roles and embracing my own unique womanhood.
/u/LostSoul1911
My journey started with childhood trauma that made me feel unsafe in my body as a woman. I transitioned to male at 16, thinking it was the answer, but I was never truly happy and my mental health got worse. After top surgery, I realized I was just trying to escape being sexualized and finally detransitioned. I now have to live with permanent changes like a deeper voice and no breasts, which I deeply regret. I'm finally healing, embracing being a woman again, and rebuilding my life.
/u/feed_me_see_more
I started identifying as a trans man at 19, hoping it would solve my deep unhappiness and body image issues. I was on testosterone for seven years, which caused serious health problems and made me feel like I was living a lonely lie. I stopped in 2022 when my body couldn't take it anymore, and seeing a friend breastfeed made me realize I was robbing myself of my womanhood. Now, I'm learning to live authentically as a woman with a body permanently changed by the hormones. I deeply regret the damage done and believe my pain was exploited by a medical system that should have protected me.
/u/Ryncage
I started as a teenager who was deeply uncomfortable with my body and found the idea of being trans online. I was convinced that medically transitioning was the answer, but testosterone didn't fix my underlying self-hatred and depression. I realized I was using it to escape my real problems instead of facing them. Now, I am detransitioning and working on self-acceptance as a female. I regret the permanent changes and wish I had been encouraged to explore the reasons for my unhappiness first.
/u/Lucretia123
I'm a female who started transitioning after a sexual assault made me feel disconnected from my body. I thought becoming a man would let me escape my pain, so I took testosterone and had surgery. I now realize my discomfort was from trauma, not my true self, and I regret the permanent changes. I've stopped hormones and am focusing on healing through therapy and outdoor activities. I'm learning to accept my body as it is and move forward.
/u/verytiredcatto
I started identifying as a trans woman at 25 after discovering the concept online, and I began taking hormones. For six years, I lived as a woman, but I eventually realized I was trying to escape my underlying issues like low self-worth and past trauma. A major turning point was when I developed a crush on a woman and realized I wanted to be her boyfriend, not her girlfriend, which made me question everything. I stopped hormones and have since found a sense of peace by accepting myself as a male. Now, I'm focused on moving forward as a more whole person, comfortable being a feminine man without needing to change my body.
/u/spare_eye
I felt out of place as a girl from a young age and later thought I was a trans man because my feelings matched descriptions of gender dysphoria. I realized that what I truly admired were masculine traits that women could also have, and seeing strong female role models changed everything. As I got older, the intense need to change my body faded, and I found peace through nature and exercise. I now see my female body as a strong, functional tool rather than something that defines my personality. I'm relieved I didn't transition and am finally comfortable just being a woman who doesn't fit the stereotype.
/u/mountain-flowers
I started transitioning at 21 because I felt I didn't fit in as a straight girl and thought becoming male would fix my discomfort with my body. I lived as a man for over three years and had top surgery, which I initially loved. I eventually realized I missed womanhood and felt deep grief over losing my ability to breastfeed, which is my biggest regret. I stopped testosterone at 24 and have since embraced my femininity and my desire for a traditional life. I'm now engaged to a wonderful man and am finally at peace with myself as a woman.
/u/neitherdreams
I grew up in a strict home where being a girl felt like a punishment, which made me want to disappear. I tried to escape by creating a genderless persona online and cutting my hair, but it was really about safety, not identity. I never medically transitioned, and I'm grateful for that now because it gave me time to heal. Through therapy and moving out, I slowly realized my discomfort came from trauma, not from being female. I'm now learning to accept myself as a woman, and I'm focused on the harm caused by pushing medical solutions on vulnerable young people.
/u/Sonderosity
I started transitioning in my early twenties, believing testosterone was the answer to my deep unhappiness and depression. For several years, I felt more confident, but I eventually realized I was using it as a workaround for trauma and self-hatred instead of healing. I stopped hormones a couple of years ago, and the process was physically and emotionally difficult. I'm now living as a woman again and dealing with permanent changes like a deeper voice. My journey taught me that true peace comes from self-acceptance, not from changing my body.